POZ Community Forums
Main Forums => Pre-HAART Long-Term Survivors => Topic started by: alterman on May 19, 2007, 08:34:01 am
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I was infected intentionally by a dude that was shooting dope in my arms and useing a dirty sering.I asked him was it clean and he said yeah its clean.
I noticed he was already sick from aids.And I know I am responcible for my own actions but some people can be so crule.I am a straight man,and I have had sex with alot of ladies since I been Pos.and I have always used protection,and I tell you, the puzzy feel better to me wearing the rubber than without,and I will feel so guilty if I'm responcible for causing someone to get sick and may even die.
The dude who infected me is dead i have already forgiven him but I hope he forgiven him self .
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i hope you inform your partners that you are hix +!!!it's your responsibility and after that it's up to them to make the decision to engage in any sexual activity with you.IF you are honest with them from the begining then you have nothing to feel guilty about.
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Alter, I'm glad you're still around. I think it's great that you take care to always use a condom for intercourse. Well done! That's behaving much more responsibly than that guy did with you.
Thanks for speaking up. We look forward to hearing more from you.
Cheers,
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Armando, it's a personal choice that someone has to make as to if and when they disclose their HIV status. As long as the person always follows safer sex principles and use a condom for intercourse, whether they choose to disclose or not is strictly up to them.
You may not have intended it as such but your admonition to Alterman had a kinda hard edge to it. At least that's how it came across to me. After all, he just finished saying that he always uses condoms.
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Hey Alterman,
Welcome! There must be something magic about 1985. That's when I tested positive as well.
I am glad you found us and look forward to hearing more from you. It truly sucks what that guy did to you. But I think you have done the better thing by forgiving him.
Carrying anger or revenge for too long can be very bad for you. You seem to have let that go and I applaud you for it.
Sorry I sound so disjointed but I am still getting used to the Sustiva buzz in my head and sometimes I just want to swat it!
Take care and let us know how things are going.
HUGS,
Mark
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Good to hear a little about you alterman. My first husband infected me in 1988; that's when I seroconverted. I know that now because I had a terrible cold that wouldn't go away and a lymph node the size of a baseball. Anyway, I tested poz in 1989. My first husband's dead now. I went through going to his grave and yelling at him about infecting me and then leaving me (by dying). Anyway, I finally did forgive him, but it took time. But I know when I truly did, I felt so much better. Thanks for starting this thread.
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Just because someone always uses condoms, does not, in my opinion, negate the need for them to disclose their status to sexual partners. We talk about informed consent and how can the recipient be truly informed, if they do not know the status of their partner?
Andy, I must say, I was very disappointed reading your post, because you imply that following safer sex guidelines resolves us of disclosing our status and I strongly disagree with that premise. Informed consent means you have ALL THE FACTS to base your decision upon, not just those handpicked to get you into the sack.
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I feel that if someone uses condoms, the only thing they would have to disclose would be in they had herpes, which condoms do not guard against. Anything else, that's up to them.
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Betty, I still cannot agree, because what happens if the condom breaks? Then you would have to disclose (both morally and legally) and how would you feel if someone did that to you? I believe that since there is no such thing as safe sex, that informed consent is the only way to go. I know what HIV can do and it will always be my responsibility to disclose my status first, because they have the right to know the truth and I can never decide on what risks are reasonable for others.
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Well, probably 99% of the time, if the condom is put on correctly, it won't break.
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Are you suggesting that because condoms can be very effective in preventing infection, that a poz person would have the right to determine if the risk of failure, no matter how small, was a risk that the unknowing partner would take? If you are so sure that they will agree with your risk assessment, then why not tell them the whole truth? True consent can never occur in the absence of the whole truth.
Sorry, some things in life are inviolate and I believe it to be morally reprehensible to not fully inform any prospective sexual partners. It is called personal responsibility and if more people exercised it, we would prevent countless infections.
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You're right-it is PERSONAL responsibility. Therefore, it is a PERSONAL choice.
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not revealing my get you life