Author Topic: nervous about unprotected sex (Read 11393 times)

worriedinneohio · « **on:** July 28, 2010, 04:15:31 pm »

4 weeks ago I recieved unprotected oral from a sex worker. I know this by itself is not a risk but she admitted that she had just gave someone else a bj a half hour earlier. Since hiv can survive in semen for a couple hours would this put me at risk of getting hiv if the semen was hiv pos and still in her throat? Also when would be the fastest i could test for hiv and get a semi reliable result? Thanks

RapidRod · « **Reply #1 on:** July 28, 2010, 04:38:15 pm »

No risk of contracting HIV from a blowjob.

worriedinneohio · « **Reply #2 on:** July 28, 2010, 06:30:20 pm »

Thanks rod. Knowing how hard it is to get hiv im confident that I dont have it. It just it seems im having all the "symptoms" they say come during ars and I really dont know what else could be wrong with me. The mind will believe what it wants sometimes, despite all evidence to the contrary. With that being said I'm still gonna get tested at the 6 week mark from exposure just for my own well being and I recommend anyone else going crazy thinking about this, put it to rest with the test.

Andy Velez · « **Reply #3 on:** July 28, 2010, 06:38:56 pm »

No matter what details you throw into the mix including that she had a mouthful of cum from someone else, in the entire history of the epidemic no guy has ever been confirmed to have been infected through receiving oral. It's one of the most common of sexual acts so we would have known long before today if it was a risk. It's safe to say you aren't going to make history by becoming the first to be infected in that manner.

Just in general you need to know that if you had a genuine risk such as unprotected vaginal or anal intercourse, neither the presence or the absence of symptoms will ever tell you anything accurately about your HIV status. Only an HIV test taken at 13 weeks past a genuinely risky event can give you a definitive negative result.

Cheers.

worriedinneohio · « **Reply #4 on:** August 01, 2010, 01:10:53 am »

Thanks for the responses. I was about ready to get the whole idea out of my head until I started feeling really shitty about the 4 week mark after the incident. Nothing major at first just a feeling of weakness and I would get run down in the evening and have the chills. Also the lymph node above (and to the left) of my groin became real tender and swollen. Today I went to my doctor and he comfirmed my gland was indeed swollen (which was painful experience in itself) and he gave me doxycycline which should kill most urinary track infections and Im going for some blood work this week. 2 doses into the antibiotic and tonight I have my first "significant" fever since this whole thing started which is 100.8. tThere is no sleep in me tonight as I feel like im on fire. This is day 32 now and Im hopeing its just a urinary track infection of some sort. What do you guys think do these symptoms sound familier in people that are seroconverting? Also I should note that (as far as I know) only one lymph node is swollen right now and it is very painful, which from what I read is not what happens during ars. Sorry about the long paragraph and again I thank you for your expert advice.

Ann · « **Reply #5 on:** August 01, 2010, 07:39:04 am »

Worried,

A temperature of 100.8F is by no means "significant". It's barely a fever at all. None of your symptoms are remotely suggestive of hiv.

While it's quite possible you got some sort of urinary tract infection or bacterial STI from getting a blowjob, there's no way you were infected with hiv from a blowjob. Not one person has ever been infected with hiv through a blowjob and you won't be the first. However, plenty of people have gotten things like gonorrhea from a blowjob.

Here's what you need to know in order to remain hiv negative:

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together.

To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

ALTHOUGH YOU DO NOT NEED TO TEST OVER A BLOWJOB anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results.

Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Ann

worriedinneohio · « **Reply #6 on:** August 03, 2010, 08:13:01 am »

Hi again. The last couple nights I woke up in the middle of the night to find my bed drenched with sweat. It is so bad I cant go back to sleep without changing the sheets. Not saying its definately hiv related, it could be a number of things. With all the symptoms I have been having though, I have to keep it as a possibilty until I know what is wrong with me. The other thing that has happened off and on is blurred vision in the sunlight. I still of the red rash around my genitals so I doubting the initial diagnosis of jock rash. i was looking at all the symptoms for hiv and I have them ALL. Well, my fever subsided and hasnt been over 100.00 for a few nights.
Is there anything I can take, or do, to limit my night sweats and make it manageable. I've searched the web but came up empty on this. Also I'm planning on going for a 6 week rapid test at the local health clinic, but giving all my symptoms if it is hiv ars shouldnt my body already be producing mad antibodies and thus it should show up if i tested even today? Thanks.

Andy Velez · « **Reply #7 on:** August 03, 2010, 08:23:20 am »

Whether you accept it or not, getting a blowjob is absolutely not a risk for HIV transmission. In the entire history of the epidemic no guy has ever been confrimed to have been infected through that extremely common sexual act.

There is nothing even remotely HIV-specific about any symptoms you are reporting. You are interpreting everything through a fear of HIV mindset now. Discuss your symptoms with your doctor.

You can go ahead and get tested if you want to and collect the inevitable negative result. Based on what you have reported of your activities, HIV is not your issue whether you believe us or not.

worriedinneohio · « **Reply #8 on:** August 03, 2010, 03:30:28 pm »

I totally agree that it would defy logic if I got hiv from my exposure. However today I got back my blood work and urine tests and I have no uti's and none of the common stds (Chlamydia, Gonorrhea, Syphilis). Yet I'm experiencing documented symptoms of an infection 35 days after receiving oral. Im gonna finish taking the doxy 100mg and hope that this all goes away but if it doesnt it will only leave more questions. Now there is alot more things it could be, but giving the time frame this is all occurring in, the next best thing to investigate will be hiv / hep. Unfortunately until then I gotta keep it open as a possibility. And whatever illness I do have I do not have a fear of it (I just want to know what I have and get treated). Whatever I have in the end I will let everyone know in case they are having similar issues they will have something to go on. Be safe people.

Andy Velez · « **Reply #9 on:** August 03, 2010, 03:50:52 pm »

Just because you haven't found the cause of your symptoms does not by default mean the cause if HIV. Nothing you did put you at risk for HIV transmission. So you can doubt as much as you want to about the blowjob you received, but no guy has ever been infected that way. You aren't going to make history by becoming the first.

Discuss the situation further with your doctor(s) because it has nothing to do with HIV. Period.

worriedinneohio · « **Reply #10 on:** August 04, 2010, 10:23:37 pm »

I was exploring the forums and I noticed that in the "living with hiv" forum people say they got infected from oral sex. Yet there is no documented cases of someone getting hiv this way. This makes me wonder why havent these people come forward to get the word out that oral sex is indeed a risk, even if it is a small one. Also, Hypothetically speaking, when someone is experiencing ars will all the sympoms go away when the conversion is over or will some symptoms remain? I appriciate you guys putting up with my questions as Im sure you heard alot of them before.

jkinatl2 · « **Reply #11 on:** August 04, 2010, 10:52:18 pm »

Yes, some people claim to have been infected through swallowing semen. No one to date (that I am aware of) has claimed to have been infected through cunnilingus, or getting a blowjob. And upon closer scrutiny, even the first group
s stories do not add up.

People do not always recall how they were infected. People get drunk. People use drugs. And, some people think that some modes of transmission offer them superiority, and make claims that make them feel better. We give a LOT of lattitude over in that section of the forums, because often these people are also fragile, and in more need of support than correction. Maybe feeling superior is the only thing keeping them sane today, or alive.

BTW, what you are doing is called "trawling," looking around in the other section. It's not particularly helpful to anyone.

So if you said you swallowed semen, I would understand your anxiety, though I would correct your scientific knowledge. No one has claimed to have gotten HIV from getting a blowjob in the other section of the forum. Trust me, that thread would be miles and miles long by now. There is some inaccuracy in this world that, compassionate as I try to be, I simply cannot let go uncorrected.

worriedinneohio · « **Reply #12 on:** August 04, 2010, 11:18:07 pm »

Ok that makes sense. The only reason I'm having so much anxiety is because of these symptoms and the timeframe of my exposure. Its getting to the point where I'm resigned to the fact that I'm going to test possitive and I was reading the other sections to kind of know what to expect next. I guess I'm jumping the guns wayyyyy to fast. However I must say these forums have some great people here and excellent moderators. This site is the only thing keeping part of me sane and scientific about my whole situation.

jkinatl2 · « **Reply #13 on:** August 04, 2010, 11:25:13 pm »

I fully expect you to test negative, but if you do test positive over receiving oral sex, rest assured that your healthcare and medication will be likely at no charge, as you will be the subject of great scientific scrutiny as the first documented case ever.

Seriously

Andy Velez · « **Reply #14 on:** August 05, 2010, 07:52:30 am »

You are SO WAY jumping the gun. Go ahead an test if you must for your peace of mind. And then collect the inevitable negative result.

What you ought to be doing is discussing your symptoms with your doctor to find out what the real cause is, which is definitely NOT HIV.

worriedinneohio · « **Reply #15 on:** August 09, 2010, 12:25:33 am »

Day 41 from exposure and I'm still trying to sort through my problems. The doxy I was on eliminated most of the pain in my genitals and my fever/chills/night sweats seem to be gone. The rash also went away (I think the doxy helped that as well). However, I still have swollen glands and a cough. Also now I have a ear infection. The good news is I'm going back to my docs on tuesday to help sort this out. Its looking like I may have had a double whammy of some kind of std and a sinus infection to go with it. I still find it wierd that the time frame was right in line with my exposure. On a side note I'm going for a hiv test on friday (day 45). Which, Assuming its negative, will put this whole notion out of my head. If somehow I turn out to be possitive then I officially had the worst oral sex ever! I should get a trophy for that or something.

jkinatl2 · « **Reply #16 on:** August 09, 2010, 01:36:31 am »

Your problems do not, and scientifically can not include HIV.

Andy Velez · « **Reply #17 on:** August 09, 2010, 09:00:46 am »

It's good that you're seeing your doctor tomorrow so that you can resolve what the real cause of your symptoms is, because it certainly is NOT HIV. Period. End of story.

worriedinneohio · « **Reply #18 on:** August 09, 2010, 11:41:41 pm »

I have another question relevant to my fears. According to aidsmap.com, "the main ways in which HIV is passed on are unprotected anal, vaginal and oral sex, by sharing injecting equipment, and from a mother to her baby during pregnancy, birth or breastfeeding." It also stats: "One American study reported that of 122 gay men with HIV, 8% reported oral sex as their only risk activity". It also said the there has been a few confirmed cases of being infected from receiving oral sex. I know that in all these cases there was probably some other sexual activity, but it would be hard to dismiss a number that high (8%) as all being infected some other way. In trying hard to refute these studies as misinformed but my knowledge of this subject is sadly lacking. So, you see the web is adding to my fears. It makes me wonder how 2 studies about the same thing can have 2 totally different outcomes. That aint science at all if it cant be dublicated. I think I'm gonna refrain from researching this farther because its only complicating things. How do you guys feel about all the conflicting science and information out there? And I know you guys consider recieving oral to be a non risk (0.0000%), but what studies do you base that on so I can read them and possible get peace of mind. I truely believe it is the conflicting info that is preventing me from moving on.

RapidRod · « **Reply #19 on:** August 10, 2010, 07:01:23 am »

You never had a risk of contracting HIV from oral sex.

Ann · « **Reply #20 on:** August 10, 2010, 07:05:05 am »

Worried,

The men who claimed they were infected through oral were GIVING the blowjobs, not being blown. The study you mention was based on patient report, and patient report is notoriously unreliable. Sometimes people forget what they did while under the influence of drink and/or drugs and some people cannot bring themselves to admit to activities like receptive anal intercourse.

The studies that are trustworthy are those which are conducted under strict scientific scrutiny. There have been three long-term studies of couples where one is positive and one is negative. In the couples who used condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, but no barrier for oral activities, not one of the negative partners became infected with hiv. Not one.

There has never EVER been a documented case of a person becoming infected through being blown. That is having their dick sucked, not sucking dick. Get it? Receptive oral refers to the person giving the blowjob because they receive the penis into their mouth. What you experienced was insertive oral, not receptive.

You did not have a risk for hiv infection.

If you read the Welcome Thread before posting like you're supposed to, you will have read the following posting guideline:

Quote

Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). If you continue to post excessively after one Time Out, you may be given a second Time Out which will last eight weeks. There is no third Time Out - it is a permanent ban. The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.

Please consider yourself warned!

Ann

worriedinneohio · « **Reply #21 on:** August 11, 2010, 06:59:52 pm »

Thanks for the reponses. Sorry I was freaking last post but I looked up the study you pointed me too and it looks hopeful. I went to my doc today and he was really surprised all my glands went down from golf balls to normal size. He said he was almost sure I had mono, but since the doxy worked he thinks im fine. Honestly I feel pretty damn good too, cept for a splitting headache this morning. So I'm def in a better mind set today. I didnt mention my hiv fears to him, but I'm going tomorrow to get the hiv test tomorrow at the local std clinic so this will just serve to verify I'm fine. It will be 44 days so it will be pretty close to conclusive giving that all i did was get oral, enough that if i still have fears I should seek mental help.

Andy Velez · « **Reply #22 on:** August 11, 2010, 09:25:22 pm »

No doubt you will test negative based on what you have reported of your sexual activity.

If you can't let go of the fears after testing negative then it will be time to get some professional help.

Good luck on your test.

worriedinneohio · « **Reply #23 on:** August 13, 2010, 03:27:02 pm »

Still waiting for the result and the wait is killing me, but it shouldnt be much longer. I have a quick question regarding antibiotics. I was taking some doxy for a possible uti I had, would this in any way odscure the results of the test? thanks in advance

RapidRod · « **Reply #24 on:** August 13, 2010, 03:40:35 pm »

No antibiotics will not skew your test for a no risk issue.

Andy Velez · « **Reply #25 on:** August 13, 2010, 06:22:43 pm »

You didn't have a risk.

You can test all you want and just collect negative results.

What you are most in danger of at the moment is getting a Time Out from this site for returning here repeatedly with your worries when you did not have a risk for HIV. You need to call a halt to this drama and get on with your life. Really.

worriedinneohio · « **Reply #26 on:** August 16, 2010, 09:03:38 am »

Got the results back and its no surprise I tested negetive to hiv 1 and 2. At least I know HIV is not my problem now, but I still have no clue what is. Thanks for putting up with me. sincerely, nolongerworriedabouthiv

worriedinneohio · « **Reply #27 on:** August 28, 2010, 09:26:47 pm »

I have never been the cheating type, but recently I have been curious about trying new things. Dumb I know and I plan on getting help. Nevertheless I got myself into another somewhat worrying situation. Last thursday I met a guy online for sex. All I did was give him oral. He did not cum in my mouth but I tasted precum. I asked him if he was clean of std of course and he said yes. Its only been a week and I feel fine. However I seen on the website that there is a theoretical risk. My question is should I get tested for this incident. It dont seem like there is a good documented case of someone getting infected this way even if he did have hiv.

Matty the Damned · « **Reply #28 on:** August 28, 2010, 09:48:35 pm »

Quote from: worriedinneohio on August 28, 2010, 09:26:47 pm

I have never been the cheating type, but recently I have been curious about trying new things. Dumb I know and I plan on getting help. Nevertheless I got myself into another somewhat worrying situation. Last thursday I met a guy online for sex. All I did was give him oral. He did not cum in my mouth but I tasted precum. I asked him if he was clean of std of course and he said yes. Its only been a week and I feel fine. However I seen on the website that there is a theoretical risk. My question is should I get tested for this incident. It dont seem like there is a good documented case of someone getting infected this way even if he did have hiv.

First up, please don't use terms like "clean" to refer to HIV status. It suggests that those of us who are HIV positive are dirty in some way. I am HIV positive and I find your use of "clean" in this manner quite offensive.

I'll assume that you gave this fellow an unprotected blowjob.

There is no HIV risk in this case. Whilst performing unprotected oral sex on a male is thought to constitute a very very low risk for transmission it is yet to be proven. Moreover ejaculation would have had to occur. Precum would not be sufficient.

In my opinion HIV testing is not warranted in this instance.

Other STDs such as gonorrhoea and chlamydia are transmitted via oral sex as they are more common in the community and much more infectious than HIV. Ejaculation does not need to occur for those conditions to be transmitted. You might arrange to have throat swabs performed to rule those diseases out.

MtD

worriedinneohio · « **Reply #29 on:** August 31, 2010, 11:47:44 pm »

My apologies on my poor use of terms. That does not reflect my opinion at all and I hope anyone that was offended can forgive my mistake. Thanks for the reply to my question. I was more worried about the stds you mentioned but figured I'd get your guys opinion anyway. Cheerio!

worriedinneohio · « **Reply #30 on:** September 26, 2010, 02:07:27 am »

This is for anyone that is focusing solely on hiv due to symptoms alone. For the record I had every single ars symptom and I was convinced that I had hiv from recieving a blowjob. I was tested for several std's at a clinic and everything came back negetive. The only thing I was not tested for was hiv so I assumed this meant I had to have it. I could not focus on daily activities because I was obsessed with finding more symptoms that I may have and to see if it was really impossible to get hiv from recieving oral. I'm sure Im not the only one to put myself thru this so for anyone who is experiencing similar problems here is what eventually happened. After 2 months of hell and 2 hiv tests I finally realized that I may be going about this all wrong. I went to my doctor and told him about my symptoms and he tested me for mono, which came back possitive to a recent infection. Mono is easily passed and has all the symptoms hiv has and yet I never even considered it. I guess my point is to tell everyone to take a deep breath and let the air settle. If you are having signs off something go to your doctor and tell them... and more importantly listen to him/her and do not diagnose yourself. Just wanted to share this and thank the moderators for putting up with my redundant questions.

Andy Velez · « **Reply #31 on:** September 26, 2010, 07:52:46 am »

It's good you have had your unwarranted concern about HIV resolved.

Get on with your life. And make sure to use condoms everytime for vaginal/anal intercourse.

worriedinneohio · « **Reply #32 on:** April 12, 2011, 01:28:26 am »

Back in January I had a pretty random sexual encounter with a girl. After drinking at a local bar we went back to my place and had protected sex after kissing more we ended up having sex again. The second time I did not wear a condom. I know my statis was negetive before this encounter because I was tested back in the summer and used protection every encounter after until now. The 3 month mark will be this friday and I plan on getting full std testing done. The hiv test always scars the crap out of me right before I go and I have just 2 questions for you. The clinic only offers the rapid oral test. I have read that it is extremely reliable if done correctly. My question is do I just go gently over my gums or do I "scrub" it a little harder to get skin. I know that sounds like a dumb question but it will greatly relieve my anxiety if I know I did it correctly. My second question is at 3 months if I test negetive can I put this behind me knowing the test is 100% accurate. As alway, I am greatful to have such knowlegdable people to take time and answer my questions.

Ann · « **Reply #33 on:** April 12, 2011, 03:47:02 am »

Worried,

I've merged your new thread into your original thread - where you should post all your additional thoughts or questions. It helps us to help you when you keep all your additional thoughts or questions in one thread. It doesn't matter how long it has been since you last posted in your thread or if the subject matter is different.

If you need help finding your thread when you come here, click on the "Show own posts" link under your name in the left-hand column of any forum page.

Please also read through the Welcome Thread so you can familiarize yourself with our Forum Posting Guidelines. Thank you for your cooperation.

If you have questions as to how to do the rapid oral test, then you should ask the person who is administering the test, not us. Some tests differer slightly in how they are performed, so ask the person giving you the test. That person will know - they will have been trained in how to administer that particular test.

And yes, the rapid tests are reliable at the three month point. If you test negative, which I fully expect you to do after a one-time insertive vaginal encounter, you will be conclusively hiv negative.

You need to learn from this and STOP having anal or vaginal intercourse without wearing a condom. Just because it's unlikely that you would become infected from a one-off, doesn't mean it can't happen.

Ann

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Author Topic: nervous about unprotected sex (Read 11393 times)