4 weeks negative?

[cologero]

Hi all,

Let me first just say that this is another great community.  Here is my story.  26 days ago I had unprotected insertive anal with a 42yr old woman (stupid, stupid!).  I guess I never really figured it to be a high risk activity (my own ignorance, I know).  Anyways, once I learned about that risk after the fact I started freaking out, through today.  The following week after the incident I was having panic attacks worrying about the situation and started to become very tired and sleepy ALL day.  I knew the woman was having casual unprotected intercourse with another 27 year old male so I ended up asking the her if I had anything to worry about.  She said the following about her situation:
1. I'm only the 3rd person she's been with in 6 yrs (2nd that she's had sex with)
2. She was tested a couple years back
3. She supposedly knows that the other guy is ok because she's "known how he is for years."
4. I'm crazy
5. I dont have to worry
After about the first week, I started getting VERY tired.  19 days after the incident I took a rapid test which came back negative.  The woman will not take one as she says I'm just acting crazy and thinking she is a ho or something.  Since about a few days to a week after the incident I have been stressed beyond belief.  I feel like I have mono and feel very weak now.  I've started getting a sinus infection and sore throat which is making me feel worse about myself.  I ordered a home blood test but have not taken it yet.  The clinic I originally went to said they would not test me again until the 3 month mark.  I'm feeling very fatigued and am convinced this is ARS.  I know I'm stupid and I deserve to feel this way for my stupidity, but is there any reassurring advice?  Should I take the Home Test this weekend (it will have been 29 days)? I feel like I let everbody I know down.

[Matty the Damned]

Col,

Yes, you have been at risk of infection and you should test for HIV. The likelihood that you've contracted HIV from this single episode of unprotected insertive anal sex is not great and I would expect that you will test negative.

Don't test this weekend. The window period for HIV testing is 13 weeks not 29 days and you won't receive a definitive answer from a test taken now. You should also be screened for other STD's as well.

What's important here is not what your sexual partner told you, but what you did. So going by what she has said is not a reliable way to know what's going on.

Please take the time to read our Welcome Thread and follow the links to our Lessons to learn more about how HIV is and is not transmitted.

MtD

[cologero]

Thank you for the reply.  I feel so guilty like I deserve this.  Do my symptoms sound like ARS? I know its hard to tell HIV based off of symptoms. I've read that 4-6 week testing is 90% accurate.  Should I retest at this time and then again at 13 weeks? The fatigue is making me feel terrible.

[Matty the Damned]

We don't discuss symptoms here. The symptoms that some people experience during acute HIV infection are indistinguishable from those of other viral infections. Whilst most people who test positive do so by the 6 week mark, a conclusive negative result cannot be obtained until week 13.

HIV is not a punishment for bad behaviour. It's simply a virus and doesn't operate at a moral level.

MtD

[cologero]

Is there a test that can be done now by my family doctor that could be more conclusive.  The waiting until 13 weeks is really making me nuts.  I read on the lessons section that there are tests available.

[Matty the Damned]

Not really.

The official window period is 13 weeks. A 6 week test is only conclusive if you test positive. If (as I expect) you were to test negative at 6 weeks, you'd have to wait until week 13 to have that result confirmed.

It's a bastard isn't it?

The good news is that a negative result at 6 weeks almost inevitably leads to a negative test result at 13 weeks.

The "other tests" you refer to are used in particularly dire circumstances, are very expensive and are not applicable in your case. Generally those results also have to be confirmed by antibody testing in any event.

This is the thing about unprotected fucking. It often leads to weeks of stress during the window period.

Now there are things you can do to lessen the stress while you wait. Go about your daily life. Do normal, productive things. Avoid the urge to search the internet looking for "information" on HIV testing/symptoms and all that other crazy stuff.

If you're sensible this time will pass very quickly.

MtD

[cologero]

Thank you very much for the encouragement. I truly learned my lesson!  I think Ill try and go back to the original place I went to at 6 weeks and see if they'll do a retest just to calm my nerves. I'm trying to not think about it now but my fatigue is just making me think "what if." This just really sucks and I hope everything comes back ok. I feel like I let everyone down.

[cologero]

I just had a test at 30 days and it came back negative! While I will definitely have a test at 3 months (maybe even again at 6 weeks just to calm my nerves more), but my question is "what are my odds (roughly) of continuing to test negative?" 50%, 60%,70%? I thought I read that the CDC states that "typically" the virus shows up on average at 25 days. Thank you all for the help and support!

[Ann]

col,

I've merged your new thread into your original thread - where you should post all your additional thoughts or questions. It helps us to help you when you keep all your additional thoughts or questions in one thread.

If you need help finding your thread when you come here, click on the "Show own posts" link under your name in the left-hand column of any forum page.

Please also read through the Welcome Thread so you can familiarize yourself with our Forum Posting Guidelines. Thank you for your cooperation.

We don't do odds here - we're not bookies. However, as the insertive partner, your result is unlikely to change. You do need to confirm your result at the appropriate time of three months.

Ann

[cologero]

col,

I've merged your new thread into your original thread - where you should post all your additional thoughts or questions. It helps us to help you when you keep all your additional thoughts or questions in one thread.

If you need help finding your thread when you come here, click on the "Show own posts" link under your name in the left-hand column of any forum page.

Please also read through the Welcome Thread so you can familiarize yourself with our Forum Posting Guidelines. Thank you for your cooperation.

We don't do odds here - we're not bookies. However, as the insertive partner, your result is unlikely to change. You do need to confirm your result at the appropriate time of three months.

Ann

Ok thank you!