Should I Move On..

[Irrationalfears]

Hello guys!

I'm a 26 year old heterosexual male, engaged, a child on the way with a severe lack of judgement;

Back in early May for my birthday, my friends wanted to take me to a strip club (last birthday before I'm married and before my daughter arrives). I was against it at first, but said why not?! I'm not paying for anything!

So fast forward, I'm really liquored up and my friends buy a private dance for me with a dancer we all know (from previous trips to the same club). While receiving my dance I stupidly did a "quick-lick" of her vagina (literally lasted probably at most 2 seconds with tastable fluid on tip of tongue) and immediately sobered up and regretted it and stopped the dance.

I didn't put much concern on it immediately after (just extreme guilt) but on the way home I remembered, I have a broken tooth (looks like there's no tooth there, but it's there -- broken down to the gum line with hole where tooth used to be -- doesn't bleed or hurt).

I immediately started freaking out and thinking about the possibility of being infected due to my quick stupid decision and literally playing a bunch of unknown scenarios in my head (what if once I did it I immediately put the tip of my tongue in the hole where my tooth used to be?!)

Anxiety has been through the roof since then.. some days I tell myself I'm being silly (you know saliva renders the virus inactive! Stop worrying! Plus you didn't do it for a long time). Others I'm literally chewing my nails down to the knuckle with who knows scenarios!

I haven't experienced any "worst flu ever" symptoms. Maybe a mild sore throat here and there but nothing too worrisome.

It's been 7 almost 8 weeks since the event and I'm ready to just put this behind me!

I took a Oraquick oral swab test at 6 weeks that came back negative.. but feel like I won't feel completely in the clear until 3 months (since that's what the box says.)

Do you guys feel like my typical low-risk exposure was increased due to my broken tooth? Or do you guys feel like I'm just being silly?

Thanks!

[Jim Allen]

Hi

So transmission of HIV via cunnilingus, well see the fluid a woman produces when sexually excited comes from the Bartholin's glands, this is a lubricating fluid and does not have any more hiv present than other bodily secretions such as saliva, sweat or tears. Saliva, sweat and tears are not infectious fluids.

Keep in mind that HIV firstly needs to be present for it to be a risk and in sufficient quantity for it to transmit, it also than needs an effective route,
and it must also reach cells which are susceptible to infection.

Move on and continue practicing safer sex and keep in mind that some sexual practices which may be described as ‘safe’ in terms of HIV transmission might still pose a risk for transmission of other STI's.

So please do get fully tested regularly for all STI's including HIV and more frequently if unprotected intercourse occurs. Also note that it is possible to have an STI and show no signs or symptoms and the only way of knowing is by testing.

Finally use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, to avoid sexually transmitted hiv infection.

Kind regards

Jim

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[Irrationalfears]

Thanks for the response Jim!

I do a lot of reading on this forum, especially in the past year. My older sister passed away from AIDS-related complications last year (she kept it a secret for a long time) and ever since I've been doing my own research and trying to educating myself!

But do you think I should retest at 3 months for conclusive result or should I not worry about it? Also did I even have a "risk"situation IYO?

[Jim Allen]

Hi

If what you posted is correct than from a HIV standpoint you have nothing to worry about and can move on.

Jim

Move on and continue practicing safer sex and keep in mind that some sexual practices which may be described as ‘safe’ in terms of HIV transmission might still pose a risk for transmission of other STI's.

So please do get fully tested regularly for all STI's including HIV and more frequently if unprotected intercourse occurs. Also note that it is possible to have an STI and show no signs or symptoms and the only way of knowing is by testing.

Finally use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, to avoid sexually transmitted hiv infection.

[Irrationalfears]

Hey again Jim -

Just another reassurance or question if you will (your previous replies helped out a lot by the way and I can't thank you enough)..

I received conflicting information regarding unprotected oral (if you would even classify my "taste test"with the tip of my tongue with very minimal fluid, oral sex) -- although everyone agrees the risk are extremely low with some even believing testing isn't warranted (HIV wise), others classify "open sores or wounds of the mouth" as increasing the risk slightly but still very low.

Which brings me back to my point about my decayed to gumline broken "tooth" (mine is top back of mouth near wisdom teeth -- also include "bite ulcers").

1. Would this be considered an open wound even though it doesn't bleed (on occasion maybe), but has a obvious hole?

2. What would you consider "theoretical risk" wounds or sores of the mouth that may potentially cause transmission? (eg. large profusely bleeding wound that requires medical attention, large canker sore vs. bite ulcer on side of cheek, small split inside lips from dryness?)

3. Would you agree that someone would have to be exposed to "gallons" of infectious fluid in their mouth along with these "wounds or sores" for transmission to be even remotely possible?

Thank you Jim for your expertise!

[Jim Allen]

Hi

I can't really comment on what others say on the internet. I can tell you that as i explained in my first post

"So transmission of HIV via cunnilingus, well see the fluid a woman produces when sexually excited comes from the Bartholin's glands, this is a lubricating fluid and does not have any more hiv present than other bodily secretions such as saliva, sweat or tears. Saliva, sweat and tears are not infectious fluids. "

So unlike giving a BJ to a man the fluids you came into contact with are not infectious to start with, also they had been exposed outside the human body. So there are 2 barriers to your concerns and here is a 3rd, the virus is very fragile, and your mouth has dozens of protein and enzymes that damage the virus and render it unable to infect.

If this is your only concern you have not put yourself at risk.

Jim