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Author Topic: Fingered  (Read 21021 times)

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Offline scared785634

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Fingered
« on: August 07, 2006, 12:15:48 pm »
Hi I am a female who was recently fingered by a male( not sure if he is HIV + or -). I am pretty sure he didnt have any cuts on his fingers. Is there a possibilty that i contracted HIV from him?

Offline Gargamel

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #1 on: August 07, 2006, 12:37:42 pm »
welcome to the sweet world of fingering-anxiety. No you didŽnt have a risk.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #2 on: August 07, 2006, 12:39:37 pm »
Fingering, whether with or without cuts, nicks, scrapes, bruises and other such on the fingering hand is not in anyway a risk for HIV transmission.

But you do need to become better informed about HIV transmission in general because this epidemic is going to be with us for a long time to come.

Please read the lesson on this site on transmission. You can find the link to it in the first thread in this section.

Cheers,
Andy Velez

Offline scared785634

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Fingered
« Reply #3 on: August 07, 2006, 12:43:50 pm »
Thanks.. because I've been so worried about it... so fingering is considered low- risk?

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #4 on: August 07, 2006, 01:17:19 pm »
Fingering is NOT considered low risk. It's considered non-risk.

As with many sexual activities the risk if one wants to call it that is only in theory as is almost any activity theoretically risky. In the real world transmission never happens through fingering and you aren't going to make history by becoming the first to be infected in that manner.
Andy Velez

Offline Gargamel

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #5 on: August 07, 2006, 01:23:15 pm »
not to worry fingered or anything, but how can you be so sure andy?
« Last Edit: August 07, 2006, 01:27:59 pm by Gargamel »

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #6 on: August 07, 2006, 09:27:00 pm »
Gargamel, quit hijack other peoples threads. Keep all your questions or thoughts in your own thread.

Offline scared785634

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #7 on: August 14, 2006, 02:56:57 pm »
I think I am going crazy... =[... Ever since I was fingered I can't calm down and i keep looking for symptoms. I had a sore throat and that went away. Now i think that my lymph nodes are swollen... Is this HIV?

Offline Ann

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #8 on: August 14, 2006, 03:03:48 pm »
scared,

Not one person has ever become infected with hiv through being fingered and you will NOT be the first.

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL STIs together. To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with a sexually transmitted infection.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can make sure your fella is using them properly. While you're on either of those pages, have a look through the bottom three links in the left-hand column. They discuss ways that you, as a woman, can protect yourself. I recommend the female condom as they are also excellent barriers against hiv infection, and importantly, they give YOU the control over condom use. They can even be put in place in advance so you're not fumbling around at the crucial moment. They're fiddly to use at first, but if you can put a tampon in, you can use these. It gets easier with practice. Give them a try.

Please also read through the Welcome Thread and follow the link to the Transmission lesson.

You did NOT have a risk of hiv infection. Make sure condoms are being used for intercourse and you won't have a risk in the future either. Use condoms and avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline scared785634

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #9 on: August 14, 2006, 03:06:16 pm »
Ok thankss... so the sore throat that i had and the possible swollen lymph nodes are from some other illness?

Offline Ann

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #10 on: August 14, 2006, 03:13:18 pm »
scared,

Go see your doctor about your concerns. Whatever is going on, it won't be hiv. And keep your hands off your lymph nodes - touching them all the time to see if they're swollen will MAKE them swell.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline scared785634

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #11 on: August 14, 2006, 03:29:40 pm »
Okay thanks so much Ann for the quick response and you definately put my mind at ease. And i think my lymph nodes did actually swell because i was always touching them and stuff to see if they were swollen or not...

Offline scared785634

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #12 on: August 18, 2006, 09:16:16 am »
Ann i have noticed that one of my lymph nodes behind the neck is swollen and my neck is slightly stiff. I cant stop worrying and thinking that its HIv. Should i get tested?
Thanks for the help

Offline Ann

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #13 on: August 18, 2006, 09:26:39 am »
scared,

If you are a sexually active adult, yes, of course you should test as a matter of routine. Everyone should because it's the only way to accurately know your status. However, if being fingered is the most sexually advanced thing you've ever done, then you really don't need to test for hiv because fingering will NOT put you at risk of hiv infection.

Please re-read my earlier posts to you. None of my advice has changed. Especially the thing about keeping your hands OFF your nodes! Go see your doctor about your physical concerns - they are not hiv related.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline scared785634

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #14 on: August 18, 2006, 09:28:21 am »
Okay thanks I think that I'll try keeping my hands off my nodes and see what happens then =]

Offline scared785634

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #15 on: August 18, 2006, 10:32:31 am »
And also does deep kissing pose a risk of getting HIV?

Offline scared785634

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #16 on: August 18, 2006, 10:38:57 am »
In addition to my post before this one... im asking this becuase different sites have different answers...

Offline Ann

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #17 on: August 18, 2006, 10:43:40 am »
scared,

How about you read through the Welcome Thread and follow the Transmission Lesson link? Your question is answered there.

Kissing is not a risk because saliva is not infectious. Read the Transmission Lesson so you know what is and what isn't a risk.

And please, re-read your thread. OK?

Other sites sometimes have hidden agendas - such as religious ones. Some don't bother to keep up on current transmission research. Some just seem to get their kicks out of frightening people. Here at AIDSmeds.com you ONLY get the real deal. Most of us who answer in this forum live with hiv every day of our lives. We have a vested interest in knowing what is risky and what isn't. We give advice from the perspective of experience coupled with reading and understanding the transmission studies published in current, first-tier, peer-reviewed scientific/medical journals.

We want everyone to not only know their status, but we also want people to stay hiv negative. You get the real deal here.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline scared785634

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #18 on: August 18, 2006, 10:46:23 am »
Oh okay thank you very much =]...
You have helped me so much Ann and now I can actually calm down and stop thinking that every little itch or sore throat or something like that is a sign that I have HIV...

Offline scared785634

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #19 on: August 19, 2006, 09:33:33 am »
Hi I have another question... for the symptoms of HIV do they all come at once or does like a sore throat first appear then swollen lymph nodes after the sore throat goes away and then maybe a week later the sore throat comes back again... Is this how the symptoms occur?

Offline Ann

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #20 on: August 19, 2006, 09:46:06 am »
scared,

Why are you worrying about ARS? You did NOT have a risk and therefore I can guarantee you aren't experiencing anything related to hiv.

Symptoms or the lack of symptoms means nothing when it comes to hiv infection - and if symptoms do happen at all, they come all at once and go all at once.

If you keep having trouble with sore throats, see your doctor. It's nothing to do with hiv.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline scared785634

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #21 on: August 19, 2006, 09:50:55 am »
Okay thanks... because right now all i have is two slightly swollen lymph nodes on the back of the left side of my neck and i think that they are swollen because i was constatnly touching and pushing on them a while ago and now i touch them from time to time.... so that might've made them swell...

Offline scared785634

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #22 on: August 19, 2006, 10:12:09 am »
And Ann also one more question... how long does it take the lymph nodes to calm down after like if I have been pusshing on them and bothering them?
« Last Edit: August 19, 2006, 10:13:42 am by scared785634 »

Offline Ann

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #23 on: August 19, 2006, 10:14:55 am »
scared,

It can take as much as a week or more for them to get back to normal, depending on how much you've irritated them. There is a good chance they were never swollen in the first place as glands near the surface of your skin can often be felt in their normal state. See your doctor about them if you continue to worry.

Whatever is going on, it's not hiv. You didn't have a risk.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Gargamel

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #24 on: August 19, 2006, 10:16:52 am »
fingered, youŽre not alone in this. check out my thread for support and lots of calming facts.

Offline Ann

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    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Fingered
« Reply #25 on: August 19, 2006, 10:19:36 am »
Gargle,

Stay in your own thread please, do not hijack other threads with your own story. Thank you for your cooperation.

Ann

(and don't bother to respond to this post either)
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline scared785634

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #26 on: August 19, 2006, 10:21:49 am »
Alright thanks Ann... now I'll definately keep my hands off them and see what happens =]... I really apprecaite the great support that I got thanks... and now i think that I can move on with my life knowing that I didnt have a risk  :)

Offline scared785634

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #27 on: August 22, 2006, 08:19:57 pm »
I have a questionnn....
What do swollen lymph nodes feel like verses not swollen?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #28 on: August 22, 2006, 08:24:52 pm »
See your doctor. Most people can't tell when their lymph nodes are swollen.

Offline scared785634

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #29 on: August 22, 2006, 08:43:53 pm »
But if they are even swollen and its only two nodes on one side of my neck is that HIV related?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #30 on: August 22, 2006, 09:36:22 pm »
Y NO...It could be a hundred things that cause it. Go see you doctor and ask and get him/her to say you have swollen nodes.

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #31 on: August 22, 2006, 10:26:37 pm »
We can cheerfully discuss what is and nit not lymph node swelling all day long. And of course, not only does stress cause them to swell, but so does poking at them to see if they are swollen. Hurts too, after a bit.

Thing is, you did not get HIv through a fingering episode. It would seem, however, that you contracted a major case of guilt. And please believe me, guilt and stress and anxiety can manifest themselves in some horrific ways. Lymph node swelling, night sweats, fever, weight loss, diarrhea, rashes. Stress can do ALL of that. And more.

I urge you to look outside the HIV "box" for the cause of, and the solution to, your situation.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline scared785634

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #32 on: September 02, 2006, 09:31:08 am »
For a few days my tongue had a white coating on it... I think that is called oral thrush... and i know that is one of the symptoms of HIv infection... so far thought all my sore throats or swollen lymph nodes and oral thrush all occured at diffeent times... I calmed myself down at first knowing that I didnt have HIv... but after a while i started to worry again...Do you think I really have HIV or am I just paranoid and relating every little thing that appears wrong on my body to HIV?

Offline Ann

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #33 on: September 02, 2006, 09:40:59 am »
scared,

Once again, you did not have a risk of hiv infection through fingering. Not one person has ever been infected this way and you will not be the first.

Yes, I think you are relating every little thing going on with your body - incorrectly - with hiv. Go see your doctor or dentist about your tongue if it worries you. Whatever is going on, it won't be about hiv.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline scared785634

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #34 on: September 02, 2006, 07:42:18 pm »
Okay but what does it mean when they say being fingered is a theoretical risk?

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #35 on: September 02, 2006, 07:52:24 pm »
They mean that if you cut off the top of your finger and stick the bleeding stump into a woman who is menstruating, you could theoretically become infected with HIV. However, it has never, ever been documented to happen.

HIV is overwhelmingly transmitted through unprotected anal and vaginal sex. If you use condoms for those activities, you will have protected yourself against HIV.

No one has ever gotten infected through fingering, and you will not be the first.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline scared785634

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #36 on: September 02, 2006, 08:29:30 pm »
oh alrightt =]

Offline scared785634

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #37 on: September 03, 2006, 10:09:03 am »
But out of curiosity... if a person has HIV and they get a regular bloodtest after lets say 2 months of having HIV will the bloodtest show up that the person has some abnormalities in their blood(HIV)? or will it not be able to tell that the person's blood is infected with HIV?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #38 on: September 03, 2006, 11:19:54 am »
No, it takes an Antibody test. Regular CBC or WBC will not detect it.

Offline scared785634

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #39 on: September 03, 2006, 11:23:26 am »
Oh I see... but do you think  I should get tested for HIV over my fingering incident?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #40 on: September 03, 2006, 11:27:24 am »
If you didn't have a risk, why would you take an HIV test?

Offline scared785634

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #41 on: September 03, 2006, 11:55:51 am »
Yeah thats true...but i cant stop relating every little thing that happens to my body to think that its HIV.. =[

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #42 on: September 03, 2006, 12:05:20 pm »
That's a problem you'll have to work on.

Offline scared785634

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #43 on: September 03, 2006, 12:14:16 pm »
Yep i guess so... but you guys helped me out a lot because i dont know how i would have managed without this site =]

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Fingered
« Reply #44 on: September 03, 2006, 12:18:05 pm »
Just because your mind may continue indefinitely to churn out scary thoughts doesn't change the facts of the situation as far as HIV science is concerned.

You did not do anything which put you at risk for HIV transmission. Period. End of story.

This is not an HIV situation.

Andy Velez

 


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