Sharing something incredibly private - hoarding!

[mecch]

Compulsive collecting running into hoarding runs in my family.  My Mom and my uncle both suffer terribly. 

I watched those American series about hoarders and found them very helpful and scary too.  I talked to my shrink and have been tackling keeping my own tendencies in check.   I was always a collector of many various things and it was always in control until I broke up with my ex, had a breakdown, then serocoverted, then adjusted to that. 

I've spent the last few months already getting rid of stuff.  It was hard in April and May keeping up the pace because my energy was low, and two HAART changes.  My feet were hurting terribly with the Norvir - but its resolved almost completely with the switch to Isentress - just some morning and late evening soreness.

First I emptied a storage room I took when I split up with my longterm ex-bf. 

In June I managed to chuck an entire garden - more than 10 years of plants and hundreds of pots.  Gave away the nice ones to friends with gardens.  Many many trips to the city recycling to get rid of all the earth and old clay pots.  It was a garden based on a gravel courtyard and there was no natural place to chuck it all.

The apartment is still quite a nightmare but getting better by the week.  I'm quite a clean freak, but can tolerate incredible amounts of disorder. Now I'm putting things in order. For instance, while I have stacks of beautiful antique linen sheets and change them every couple of days, this week is the first time in several months I actually made my bed up the way it always used to be.

I don't think any of this mess would have happened if I had been living with someone - in fact, it was really a surprise that I let the disorder build so much, so quickly.  It started as redecorating and buying new things to put my old life behind me - and then after a year spiraled out of control. 

Now, on holiday, its quite fun and satisfying in the end, coming to terms with self-regulation for my own sake.  I love that I have all different things to live with, down to the last teaspoon, and it will be fun to have it all in place and liveable soon, having dinner parties, etc.  In fact to make sure that I dont have too much I bought about 6 big old armoires and cabinets - one for each room, and all the stuff will go in, behind glass, making rest for eye and keeping down on dusting in the future.  The goal is, anything that doesn't fit in a closet or armoire, has to go!



 

[Matty the Damned]

Unless you live like this:

You cannot call yourself a hoarder.

MtD

[mecch]

He he, the original hoarders!  

While I don't have 10 grand pianos in a dilapidated town house, I am typing this from my new bedroom and looking at three crystal chandeliers - one waterford, one murano, and one marie therese of unknown origin, none of them hanging because I finally decided on the san francisco gay 90's brass one that is hanging!  There are at least half a dozen other lustres hanging in the attic!

While my abode is not as bad as that pic, my mother has rooms that bad, so I am very very on guard!

PS - no hoarding of garbage, newspapers, etc etc here.  Oh my god, have you ever seen the Hoarder series (there are two different ones).  The things people hoard, and their rationales, its otherworldly, when its not also quite funny to an outsider.

[mecch]

I'll tell you what, if the board will be kind and encouraging about this, I will post before and after pictures in September . 

[weasel]

  I LOVE Crystal Chandeliers 
  Can never have too many fine antiques 
  Bob cringes when I find new very old Lighting fixtures  LOL
  I found a fixture that really looks like an EGG Platter ! Has Crystals  hanging off it !
  And a week later found the matching BABY  one !  I love them !
  I say if you got the room it is not clutter !
                                                                 Carl

[Dachshund]

I am typing this from my new bedroom and looking at three crystal chandeliers - one waterford, one murano, and one marie therese of unknown origin

Sounds like a bad case of labelqueenitis to me.

[David_CA]

While it's good you're getting rid of unnecessary 'stuff', just make sure you don't get rid of something that you actually want / need.  I'm just kidding, kind of; I tend to keep lots of things around, too!

David (whose husband often calls him a horder)

[mecch]

Yeah me too on the chandeliers but it took me quite a few purchases to figure out that my new aesthetic runs less to Louis XVI and Marie Therese and more to black lacquer, brass, Regime's, Biba, San Francisco Hippy, florescent pressed tin, vaseline glass, boobie, Italian 60's and 70's neoclassical modern, film noir, Venetian.  The only constants are Thonet and Bauhaus

[mecch]

If ANYONE has a lead on a Fenton Gone With The Wind lamp, in bright blue or fuscia, for less than the 500 I see them for on ebay - I'm BUYING!!!

[john33]

Mecch,
having just moved i just discovered loads of useless things I'd been keeping "just in case i light need it again" and cursed myself thouroughly.

But you've just put me in perspective.

Mind you that feeling after the sort and tidy is soooooo good. enjoy

(by the way sorry I can't help you on the lamp)

John

[Hellraiser]

PS - no hoarding of garbage, newspapers, etc etc here.  Oh my god, have you ever seen the Hoarder series (there are two different ones).  The things people hoard, and their rationales, its otherworldly, when its not also quite funny to an outsider.

You mean like bagging and storing their own feces?  Yes I've seen that. they're probably saving it to fingerpaint their walls in a lovely shade of brown.

[skeebo1969]

I'll tell you what, if the board will be kind and encouraging about this, I will post before and after pictures in September . 

I won't give you a hard time about it.  I tend to be an extremely sensitive person who would never make fun of someone else's personal issues.  Can you at least post a before pic right now?  I think it would be best and might just inspire you to accomplish your goal faster.  Post a pic Mecch, I won't say anything negative. 

C'mon we wanna see this fucking pigsty you've been eating caviar in..  right guys?

[Matty the Damned]

I won't give you a hard time about it.  I tend to be an extremely sensitive person who would never make fun of someone else's personal issues.  Can you at least post a before pic right now?  I think it would be best and might just inspire you to accomplish your goal faster.  Post a pic Mecch, I won't say anything negative. 

C'mon we wanna see this fucking pigsty you've been eating caviar in..  right guys?

Whereas Skeeter will be the soul of sensitivity, Matty the Damned will excoriate you mercilessly.

So yeah, go on. Post the pictar!

MtD

[phildinftlaudy]

Congrats Mecch-
I try to fall (sometimes not as successfully) the rule that if I have looked at it or used it for 6 months then I probably don't need it.... and I dispose of accordingly.

Of course this rule does not apply to certain body parts....

[Hellraiser]

Congrats Mecch-
I try to fall (sometimes not as successfully) the rule that if I have looked at it or used it for 6 months then I probably don't need it.... and I dispose of accordingly.

Of course this rule does not apply to certain body parts....

I'm actually very spartan I regularly throw things out when I forget they exist.  Regularly go throw my stuff if it's in storage or boxes and toss it.  The only exception is clothes for some reason I'll hold onto a shirt until it's just a midriff T

[Rev. Moon]

Sounds like a bad case of labelqueenitis to me.

Don't blame huh for sitting there having a late dinner with the finest Dom Pérignon and caviar under her fine chandeliers (which she forgot to mention belonged to royalty at some point) as she types this entry. 

Blame her for the misleading title; I don't see how this confession is something "incredibly private."  It would fall under that category if the story involved hoarding used condoms or other mementos from her adventures with fabulous and famous rich men at Harvard or in Geneva.

This entry puts the meh! in mecch.

[Miss Philicia]

Do I need to disclose before hoarding Murano lamps in my bushes or not? 

[OneTampa]

OMG!  Last week I began a post about hoarding and decided to delete it.  I intended to ask about it as  I found out that a friend I recently re-connected with is a hoarder and is very aware of it.  He is a nice guy, handsome, well educated and works in the health field. When I offered to come over and help him move some stuff, he nearly bit my head off.  I was too through!  I later found out that many of his things carry memories of friends and times.  The other stuff is just that--stuff and clutter.

This is an interesting topic.  

[Merlin]

Everyone's a hoarder to some degree if one dares to admit it. There's a huge difference between a home and a showroom. Once I visited the showroom house of an ex boss to drop off some work stuff and man, his place looks unlived in. He had that place for years. The sofa still had the original plastic polytene wrappings!
He was so proud of his immaculate mansion and followed me everywhere (as if he was afraid I would touch anything) whilst he boasted about where he bought all his expensive antiques and furnishings. It was so stressful that I almost dared not even breathe !
I heard from the office staff that his wife left him becos of his obsession with keeping everything overtly orderly to the dot. It translated at work too. He was a control freak.

Unless compulsive hoarding starts to block access ways to any room, I believe holding on to some precious memories in stuff is healthy. That's my view. 

[WillyWump]

My mother is a hoarder on the realm of what's pictured above. She lives in a 3 bedroom house and all the rooms are full of crap, old magazines, a ton of yarn, old coffe cans, empty styrofraom egg cartons (thousands of them). etc... etc... oh and 3 cats. There are trails through the house, she sleeps on the couch next to a pile of 5 year old newspapers.

I am so repulsed by it that I find myself throwing out everything that I havent used recently. If I havent used it in a month, its tossed. I started collecting Hallmark Kiddie Cars, and then decided I had too many (6 of them) so I sold them on Ebay. Dont get me wrong I love to go to Estate Sales and bring back a box of crapola, but none of it stays around too long, I either give it away or sell it on Ebay.

Right now as I type this I can pack up everything I own into 3 boxes, except for the furniture. I like it this way.

JUST SAY NO TO CRAP!

-Will

[Rev. Moon]

Right now as I type this I can pack up everything I own into 3 boxes, except for the furniture. I like it this way.

Good.  It will make your move to Philadelphia or Miami a lot easier.  Unless you are still planning to move to Argentina to become Mrs. Jesus Hernandez.

[GSOgymrat]

"If you haven't touched it in a year it doesn't need to be here." - Ford

[WillyWump]

Good.  It will make your move to Philadelphia or Miami a lot easier.  Unless you are still planning to move to Argentina to become Mrs. Jesus Hernandez.

I get moving to Argentina for "Jesus". But Philadelphia....are you suggesting that I move to Philly to force the unrequited love issue with MissP?

And who the hell is in Miami?

-Will

[Miss Philicia]

Good.  It will make your move to Philadelphia or Miami a lot easier.  Unless you are still planning to move to Argentina to become Mrs. Jesus Hernandez.

What kind of cocksucker only has 3 boxes of possessions?  That wouldn't even hold my shoe collection.  I bet Wumpy even rents his furniture.

[Rev. Moon]

I get moving to Argentina for "Jesus". But Philadelphia....are you suggesting that I move to Philly to force the unrequited love issue with MissP?

And who the hell is in Miami?

I believe that you and La Felicita would make one lovely couple. 

Who's in Miami?  Hmmmmpf.... Did you expect me to move to awful San Antonio when you proposed a few weeks ago?

[WillyWump]

I believe that you and La Felicita would make one lovely couple.  

Who's in Miami?  Hmmmmpf.... Did you expect me to move to awful San Antonio when you proposed a few weeks ago?

Oh my bad. I forgot I proposed to you. There's just so many to keep track of. *sigh*.

@MissyP - ummm, ok Imelda Marcos you need to downsize the shoe extravaganza.  and no I dont rent my furniture. I did however get my Natuzzi Leather living room set second hand off Craigslist.

and your blatant silence regarding my reference to our unrequited love is deafening...and it stings.

-Will

[Miss Philicia]

and your blatant silence regarding my reference to our unrequited love is deafening...and it stings.

-Will

I'm too busy laughing at your hand wringing about hot weather in Vegas when you live in San Antonio.  Anyway, I'll quickly be second fiddle with whatever cheap rentboy you pick up after gorging on buffets 24/7.

[Rev. Moon]

I'm too busy laughing at your hand wringing about hot weather in Vegas when you live in San Antonio.  Anyway, I'll quickly be second fiddle with whatever cheap rentboy you pick up after gorging on buffets 24/7.

Good heavens.  That ghastly "classy" twink cannot be 19 as he claims.  But my oh my, what gift he has been given between them legs.

[Matty the Damned]

Good heavens.  That ghastly "classy" twink cannot be 19 as he claims.  But my oh my, what gift he has been given between them legs.

Ugh. I know. Such things are wasted on some boys.

I always fancied the Vumpy and Teddy would make a cute twosome.

MtD

[WillyWump]

I'm too busy laughing at your hand wringing about hot weather in Vegas when you live in San Antonio.  Anyway, I'll quickly be second fiddle with whatever cheap rentboy you pick up after gorging on buffets 24/7.

FINALLY, you have found something I can sink my teeth into. Now I need to find another $225 for the Vegas trip. Much obliged P, Much obliged.

-Will

[Rev. Moon]

I always fancied the Vumpy and Teddy would make a cute twosome.

Throw Miss Trey in the mix and they can have a little rednecky pozzie love-nest.

[mecch]

Rev.Moon -
I come to this forum for community and support.  Yeah entertainment too.  Please spare me your off-topic, personal attacks.  Nasty Ignorant Shade describes your response to my thread very well.  Hoarding is a real problem and its comes with shame and it IS something very private and I didn't open this thread to invite abuse.  

If you were a gentleman you would apologize for your gross remarks, rather than wearing them as a badge of honor.  

Now stop haunting me please with your negative presence - in this thread and elsewhere. Keep your cattiness on topic, at least, that I can respond accordingly.  

And rethink the global purpose of why people belong to this community.  

If I need a reality check via workaday bitchiness like yours, I can go to the local queenie bar.

[emeraldize]

Hey Mecch,

I've seen one of the Hoarders series--quite a number of the shows were run back to back one weekend. I was glued to the set. I didn't realize there are two series. I think it's fascinating as a disorder and tragic for the sufferers.

I'm not a hoarder, but I definitely have some stuff to chuck---mostly papers/books----but a LOT OF PAPERS/BOOKS.

So, no matter that you've got chandeliers laced into your piles of stuff, I think what I'm reading is you are trying to confess and address as a way of movng on.

I have several friends who are in the same boat and we talk about it---it's reassuring to know that you're not the only person who has a hard time making decisions about what to keep/toss.

And, it can be motivating to fess up and then someone can ask periodically, so, how's it going? Is the living room clear yet? Are you still sleeping on the couch? Have you put that whatever for sale on eBay or taken items to Goodwill or Salvation Army.

I am determined to get my stuff cleared out!! You wanna share a before picture? Please do. Cuz when you post the After picture or pictures, I will root you on.

Wanna set some goals on this? If not here, via PM. I'm envious of people who have a way of dealing with the materials flow in life---clothes, receipts, tools, incomplete projects, paint and on and on.

Hell, I did a deep clean on condiments in the fridge recently--after looking at shelf lives online for some stuff I had and that was very educational. Dumped a bunch of contents, recycled the glass jars and purchased new mustard. Done.

So, I don't know if your comments to Rev. Moon are serious or humorous---I'm not in tune with all the subtle interplays here anymore. But, I think you started this thread in the hope of getting some support.

I'm game.

Em

[Assurbanipal]

Hey Mecch,

I've seen one of the Hoarders series--quite a number of the shows were run back to back one weekend. I was glued to the set. I didn't realize there are two series. I think it's fascinating as a disorder and tragic for the sufferers.

I'm not a hoarder, but I definitely have some stuff to chuck---mostly papers/books----but a LOT OF PAPERS/BOOKS.

Oh NOES!!!!    !!!!

I used to think that maybe I had too many books. 

But that was an error!!  I merely did not have enough bookshelves.     After all, a wall of bookshelves provides superior insulation, decorative elements, safety, amusement, world peace...

But now, perhaps I don't have enough walls.

 

[edfu]

The only thing I've ever "hoarded" was books (and Playbills, over 1,000).  Since I had been working in book publishing for 35 years, it was not at all surprising or unusual.  I was also lucky enough to have a room in my NYC apartment of 25 years I used as a library and computer room.  In addition, I had book shelves on one wall of my living room, floor to ceiling, 12 feet high.  In all, I had an estimated 2,500 books.  When I moved and had to downsize, most of those books had to go.   

It was a real struggle to give them away.  No one wanted them:  NYC Public Library, Housing Works, Gay Men's Health Crisis (I had one of the largest privately owned collection of titles relating to AIDS), Salvation Army, etc.  Part of the problem was that I was living in an 1850 Georgian townhouse, on the fourth floor, with no elevator.  I attempted to sell some of what I thought were the most valuable, but it wasn't worth the effort.  The most I got for one of them was $100 for a first edition of Hunter S. Thompson's "Hell's Angels."  Finally, quite by accident, my ophthalmologist agreed to take most of them, particularly the AIDS collection.  In the end, I had to call a "junk collector" the day before my move, and he removed several hundred to be scrapped.

It was very painful, and I still regret not keeping more than I did, but the situation became a crisis right down to deadline.     

[mecch]

So, no matter that you've got chandeliers laced into your piles of stuff, I think what I'm reading is you are trying to confess and address as a way of movng on.

I have several friends who are in the same boat and we talk about it---it's reassuring to know that you're not the only person who has a hard time making decisions about what to keep/toss.

And, it can be motivating to fess up and then someone can ask periodically, so, how's it going? Is the living room clear yet? Are you still sleeping on the couch? Have you put that whatever for sale on eBay or taken items to Goodwill or Salvation Army.

I am determined to get my stuff cleared out!! You wanna share a before picture? Please do. Cuz when you post the After picture or pictures, I will root you on.

Thats a really sweet post and yes, you nailed the issue - even though I don't have piles of garbage, I've got piles of funky interesting beautiful stuff and it has destroyed the functionality of my home, compounded by piles of all sort of other unattended to business.  Overwhelmed feeling for more than a year - just doing my job well and enjoying that.

Pictures will come 1) when I figure out a picture hosting site and 2) when I trust I won't be abused here.

[Matty the Damned]

Thats a really sweet post and yes, you nailed the issue - even though I don't have piles of garbage, I've got piles of funky interesting beautiful stuff and it has destroyed the functionality of my home, compounded by piles of all sort of other unattended to business.  Overwhelmed feeling for more than a year - just doing my job well and enjoying that.

Pictures will come 1) when I figure out a picture hosting site and 2) when I trust I won't be abused here.

1) http://photobucket.com
2) Tuffen up, Mary.

I, for one, cannot wait to see rooms filled from floor to ceiling with cuckoo clocks and fondue sets.

MtD

[edfu]

when I trust I won't be abused here.

When pigs fly....

[Dachshund]

Look, I don't give a rat's ass, but nothing described here is about hoarding. Self-centered navel gazing, you bet. Hoarding, no way.  

[edfu]

Self-centered navel gazing, you bet. Hoarding, no way.  

As I said:  when pigs fly....

[Jeff G]

What is navel gazing ? I would hate to miss out on a new fangled insult I may could use at the right moment .


Never mind ... I looked it up . I'm surprised it didn't have my pic by the definition .

[Dachshund]

As I said:  when pigs fly....

Oh honey, keep repeating that ad nauseam.

[edfu]

If you want to use Latin, you should spell it correctly.

It's "nauseam." 

[BlueMoon]

1) http://photobucket.com
2) Tuffen up, Mary.

I, for one, cannot wait to see rooms filled from floor to ceiling with cuckoo clocks and fondue sets.

MtD

Sounds like we could be talking Luriddigs.com* here.

*Not safe for work or human sight.

[Matty the Damned]

Sounds like we could be talking Luriddigs.com* here.

*Not safe for work or human sight.

Indeed.

MtD

[Dachshund]

If you want to use Latin, you should spell it correctly.

It's "nauseam." 

thanks doll, duly noted

[mecch]

So today I started on the mountains of clothes.
It's a wrenching experience to sort and get rid of stuff.
Plus some I am getting rid of because I got fat in the last 18 months.
Some I am saving because I might go back to normal?
And some I get rid of because I am too old for the style.
And some I get rid of because it reminds me of times I don't want to remember.
I wish I had the courage to throw it all away but some I want to keep and wear. And need to wear in my life. And I don't have much cash to replace an entire wardrode.
I bought a couple of pairs of fat jeans since its just the waist and tummy that seems to have expanded so quickly. All the rest of it is sort of unnoticeable in clothes, which still fit everyere else, because I was gangly before and some meat on the bones is welcome.  I kind of like filling out the shirts in the shoulders, arms.

The key is that I bought those armoires for every room. So eventually, every thing I want has to fit in th armoire in each room.
This is arbitrary and it helps a lot to force the purge.
Its very hard each time I have to start this work and several times during it I have to stop and breathe or have a Temesta or cry.  I cry at least once every day I really work on this mess I have made.
My shrink said it was fine, however, and just to keep on pushing even if its stressy and sad and tiring.

[skeebo1969]

So today I started on the mountains of clothes.
It's a wrenching experience to sort and get rid of stuff.
Plus some I am getting rid of because I got fat in the last 18 months.
Some I am saving because I might go back to normal?
And some I get rid of because I am too old for the style.
And some I get rid of because it reminds me of times I don't want to remember.
I wish I had the courage to throw it all away but some I want to keep and wear. And need to wear in my life. And I don't have much cash to replace an entire wardrode.
I bought a couple of pairs of fat jeans since its just the waist and tummy that seems to have expanded so quickly. All the rest of it is sort of unnoticeable in clothes, which still fit everyere else, because I was gangly before and some meat on the bones is welcome.  I kind of like filling out the shirts in the shoulders, arms.

The key is that I bought those armoires for every room. So eventually, every thing I want has to fit in th armoire in each room.
This is arbitrary and it helps a lot to force the purge.
Its very hard each time I have to start this work and several times during it I have to stop and breathe or have a Temesta or cry.  I cry at least once every day I really work on this mess I have made.
My shrink said it was fine, however, and just to keep on pushing even if its stressy and sad and tiring.

Pics or it never happened....  I didn't read the above by the way, but I see the word cry in the part I quoted as I type this.  Did you stub your toe?  Pics or it never happened....

[mecch]

You'll get pics when the project is closer to finished.
I can't take the meanness and lack of understanding of the seriousness, since I'm guarding my strength for the project itself, it's touch and go, doing it alone.

[leatherman]

hang in that and keep tackling it a bit at a time. What a personal acheivement this will be for you when it's all completed. 

[john33]

yeah keep at it Mecch

and hanging onto a pairs of jeans is a good idea, a goal sort of.

[Ann]

Well Mecch, I have a confession to make - and I never thought I'd say this, but - I empathise with you very much on this. I'm a bit of a hoarder too; I think it stems from a time in my life when I had pretty much nothing.

The trouble is, I have to move temporarily some time in 2011. I live in a council house and the houses on my estate are due for an upgrade - new wiring, new kitchens and bathrooms, new mains-wired smoke alarms and things like that. It means I have to move out, lock, stock and two smoking barrels, into a transit house, then move back in two to three months when the work is complete. That's two moves with a helluva lot of crap to shift.

I have the option to stay in the transit house, but that means I have to arrange the move myself and pay for things like new carpet and the cost of decorating in the transit house. If I don't want to stay in the transit house, they pay professional movers and my house would also be completely freshly painted, free of charge. I really can't afford to stay in the transit house, which will be a bit of a wrench if I get one in an area of town I like better than where I am.

I'm going to have to start whittling my possessions down, whichever way I go on this. For example, I've got well over 1,000 books. Maybe if I get busy and start selling some of this stuff on Ebay I might be able to afford to stay in the transit house. I'm going to have to raise some money somehow anyway, because even if I stay in the house I'm currently in, I'll probably have to replace the living room carpet and the lino in the kitchen. I just don't have that kind of dosh.

And the kicker? Last time I had to move, my daughter was away at university and I had to do the move all on my own. She's been back home living with me for the past year, but when this move-to-a-transit-house thing comes up, probably in February, she'll be at the University of East Anglia in Norwich studying for her teaching certificate. Not fair!

[RapidRod]

Well Mecch, I have a confession to make - and I never thought I'd say this, but - I empathise with you very much on this. I'm a bit of a hoarder too; I think it stems from a time in my life when I had pretty much nothing.

The trouble is, I have to move temporarily some time in 2011. I live in a council house and the houses on my estate are due for an upgrade - new wiring, new kitchens and bathrooms, new mains-wired smoke alarms and things like that. It means I have to move out, lock, stock and two smoking barrels, into a transit house, then move back in two to three months when the work is complete. That's two moves with a helluva lot of crap to shift.

I have the option to stay in the transit house, but that means I have to arrange the move myself and pay for things like new carpet and the cost of decorating in the transit house. If I don't want to stay in the transit house, they pay professional movers and my house would also be completely freshly painted, free of charge. I really can't afford to stay in the transit house, which will be a bit of a wrench if I get one in an area of town I like better than where I am.

I'm going to have to start whittling my possessions down, whichever way I go on this. For example, I've got well over 1,000 books. Maybe if I get busy and start selling some of this stuff on Ebay I might be able to afford to stay in the transit house. I'm going to have to raise some money somehow anyway, because even if I stay in the house I'm currently in, I'll probably have to replace the living room carpet and the lino in the kitchen. I just don't have that kind of dosh.

And the kicker? Last time I had to move, my daughter was away at university and I had to do the move all on my own. She's been back home living with me for the past year, but when this move-to-a-transit-house thing comes up, probably in February, she'll be at the University of East Anglia in Norwich studying for her teaching certificate. Not fair!

I feel for you Ann. I hate moving.

[Ann]

I feel for you Ann. I hate moving.

Oh man, I hate it too. I hate to complain though, because I'll be getting new kitchen cupboards, sink and worktops as well as a new bathroom suite. All of the existing is pretty old and has been used by countless other tenants. (these houses were built in the 1960s) My bathtub has loads of ciggy burns in it from the last tenant. How on earth they got there, well, I'm not sure I want to know. They're not on the edge, which I could understand, they're inside the tub. Too weird.

I've seen other houses they've refurbed and they do a good job. It's almost like moving into a brand-new house. The transit houses are all refurbed before they go on the transit list, so it would be the same thing if I kept the transit.

I spoke about my misgivings to the housing officer, who also happens to be a friend. He said, "Well, it will give you the chance for a clear-out" as he eyed the three-deep, ten-to-fifteen-high, nine-long stack of paperbacks in front of one of my over-flowing bookcases. And he didn't even look in the under-stair closet off my kitchen. I wish I had a magic wand.

[Rev. Moon]

Ugh, I hate the mere thought of moving. I'm glad I won't have to do that again for a good while. Way too many books, clothes, CDs, movies, and 12" records to put in boxes.

I guess most people (if not all) are boarders of some type.

But will it make you happy?

[Realist]

Council contractors - refurb it in 2-3 months my eye! Don't believe any of that crap!

Joking aside, when they are done it should be like moving into a completely new house. How invigorating.

I have to admit, I am the complete opposite to you hoarders - if I haven't used it or touched it in the past couple of weeks its gone - with the exception of my books.

 I'll pop over and give you a hand to shift if you like.

[Ann]

Council contractors - refurb it in 2-3 months my eye! Don't believe any of that crap!

Actually, they're pretty good. They've done other houses in town and they've never taken more than three months and all these houses are exactly the same cookie-cutter type places.

 I'll pop over and give you a hand to shift if you like.

I'll take  you up on that! Since my daughter will be away at uni, you can have her room. And you can take some books home with you!

[john33]

Good luck Anne,

I moved a month ago and had to have a major clear-out.

The biggest surprise, apart from how much crap I'd accumulated (never have been able keep to the not-touched rule) was how i managed to fit it all in my old place, it was only 22m˛ and badly designed to boot.

[wellington]

I think it's great that you have been able to write about and express something so personal and private with such lucidity and conviction. I have no doubt that your 'after' photos will do your journey credit.

[skeebo1969]

   I get worried about Mecch when he ain't around for a day...... especially since he's tackling this all by himself.  Does anyone have his number?   I keep having visions of him trapped between a reproduction Picasso and a Renaissance era chandalier, all the while not being able to get to his pillbox.

[mecch]

LOL.  
When it gets really dreary, I just give up and leave the apartment for the day.  
Today was pretty good. Though i felt weary and depressed in the afternoon when I was getting moving.  
Tomorrow I'm doing a run with the car to get rid of some piles I made in each room.
Its hard to resist the temptation to move things from one room to another and not get anywhere, but I am on top of my pesky hoarder devil spirit and try to overcome!

Oh by the way, there are NO paintings in my apartment, so certainly not any reproduction Picassos!

I hope the kitchen hall and office are clear so I can still have my voodoo cocktail on Friday. Mess or no mess in the other rooms.  

I invited some weekend guests in September so it really has to come together.  My best friend hasn't visited in a year because of this disaster in the apartment.

And I still didn't get a bed.  Won't get it until I have a place all clear to put it!

[Ravhyn]

I'm a hoarder..

me and the hubs live in a 3 bedroom house. and two of the rooms are used mainly just for piling stuff up in. My husband is a hoarder too and he hordes like computer stuff we have just tons and tons of computer units and monitors lieing everywhere three big 52 inch T.v's that dont work.  Not to mention my hundreds and hundreds of barbie dolls, craft items, vhs movie collection and my movies.  It's sad when its just us with so much junk.  We've even got a 50 gallon fishtank I got off of craigslist that we have never used. It just sits in the laundry room.

Make matters worse I'm a survivalist so I get really finicky about throwing things away because I stick to if the world goes to hell one day we may need some of the stuff...for trade, or barter or to live off of.

[Joe K]

Mecch,

Being an ex-hoarder myself, I can empathize with what you are going through and how difficult it can be. The reason that I stopped hoarding is that I no longer wanted my possessions to control me. Stephen and I have been down sizing, since we moved from Florida and we have gotten rid of about 75% of what we owned. The liberation that came, by only keeping those items, of real value, we find ourselves with a manageable household. In a way, I see hoarding as another form of addiction, to material things. For me, when a facet of my life begins to overpower my life, I will do whatever I need to regain my piece of mind. I say, if you want to change, take your time and do it however is easiest for you. You should be proud of yourself for wanting this change and I would not worry what others think of your actions. You do not need the approval of anyone, to do what is right for you. Good luck.

Joe

[ballerina]

Two years ago I went through a rough time,  and started acquiring stuff as a distraction. It piled up, and moved with me into my current house. I did get rid of some, but most got stuffed into all the closets in the house, where it has stayed until last week.  I started a full-scale, get-rid-of-shit mission, and have taken three car loads to Goodwill so far. Sorting through it is relieving but also disturbing,  because it makes me re-live the emotional crap that caused me to collect it all.

Hang in there, it sounds like you are steadily working through it. That's really the best way to do it!

[weasel]

  Hey  mecch ,
                        I'm in Connecticut !

     Fab  antique stores !

    I have taken some great photos  of  hanging  Chandler   YOU  WOULD LOVE !

    I'll have to post !

    My Twin has what my Mother would have called  a    " STUNDEAN "   hanging from the second

    floor mezzanine   in his   FOY AY 

                     Be well   my Friend , I'll be  in  Huntington

       And then off  to P-Town , Cape Cod   for a birthday with my twin 

                                                           Carl

PS : yes HOARDING !

        BOB JUST CALLED AND SAID  A HUGE BOX CAME FROM   LAS VEGAS

        I HAVE MY HOARDING IN CONTROL .

       IT IS BOB THAT HAS THE  " WHOME IS GOING TO DUST THIS CRAP "  SYNDROME !

       ROTFLMAO ! 

    I SHALL COLLECT TILL THE COW COMES  HOME 


     Live your life for you !  , I LOVE to have things and friends AND FOOD  with drink !
       

[skeebo1969]

    I have taken some great photos  of  hanging  Chandler   YOU  WOULD LOVE !

 

  I know it's not porn, but the moderators might take exception if you post photos of some dead guy named Chandler hanging.

[RapidRod]

If I move again it's adding eight wheels bolt in the tongue and hook a truck to it and down the road it goes. The only things that need picked up is the skirting and the concrete blocks. 

[mecch]

Still chugging along.  A friend is coming to visit for next weekend and I got a bed for him and room that won't make him faint. I still don't have space for my bed, however.  Almost. Hopefully this weekend, with another truck rented on Monday for a run to the dump.

Would the people who happen to read this, and continue to make cracks about my hoarding as somehow worthy of dismissive comedy, please stop.  If you can't wrap your minds around the fact that hoarding and hoarders are real, and a painful challenge to solve, have the decency to me, personally, to stop being cavalier.

To the supportive members, my many thanks, your words here and in private messages have been very helpful this summer.

[Ann]

Mecch, I hate to be the one to break it to you, but when you post on a public website, you gotta take what you get. If you don't want unsupportive responses, don't post. It really is that simple. It's the internet, not your bedroom. Duh.

[leatherman]

with another truck rented on Monday for a run to the dump.

to get anything accomplished it takes hard work and patience. It sounds like you're still chugging along - and moving forward. WooHoo! Keep at it.  Just keep in mind how neat, clean, and healthy your place with be without the clutter, and dust-collecting items.

[mecch]

Mecch, I hate to be the one to break it to you, but when you post on a public website, you gotta take what you get. If you don't want unsupportive responses, don't post. It really is that simple. It's the internet, not your bedroom. Duh.

You're wrong. I have to listen to what I get, but I don't have to "take it." Its mean.

Because I said I have a real problem to deal with. And when people doubted that, I clarified and restated that it is quite serious and also asked people to be kind. 

If I came on here and said I was a drug addict and was detoxing and it is difficult, would you feel the same?

Members of this forum have an obligation to not bully, am I correct?

Fun and joshing where it belongs.  Not when someone cries uncle. 

Surely you are aware of that Ann. If you are not, I'll send you some literature.

So be mean if you want, anyone, but that's all it is, and I don't have to "take it".

[Jeff G]

Hang in there Mech ... I have a buddy that is dealing with his hoarding issues . It takes time but you can get there . It took me three years just to get Tim to throw away a few bags of stuff so I think you are on the right path .

[skeebo1969]

You're wrong. I have to listen to what I get, but I don't have to "take it." Its mean.

Because I said I have a real problem to deal with. And when people doubted that, I clarified and restated that it is quite serious and also asked people to be kind. 

If I came on here and said I was a drug addict and was detoxing and it is difficult, would you feel the same?

Members of this forum have an obligation to not bully, am I correct?

Fun and joshing where it belongs.  Not when someone cries uncle. 

Surely you are aware of that Ann. If you are not, I'll send you some literature.

So be mean if you want, anyone, but that's all it is, and I don't have to "take it".

Mecch, you were not around during my first year here.  I did share about my constant going in and out of hospitals and having to give up a very good paying job.  It was during this time that I fell behind in child support and my mortgage.  I was an open book..... about pretty much everything.  Some of my brothers and sisters here were extremely supportive during this time, especially one named Matty.

But.. every so often I would get the sarcastic comment of "Oh hey Mr. Father of the year", or "you're a loser of the worst kind".  I admit I took that shit hard, but like Ann said I shared it and if someone does not want to understand the plight of trying to regain ones health back, well what was I suppose to do?

I didn't pussyfoot around about it.  When they came at me I spoke my mind, but I didn't sit here and rant like you are now.  

Plus I would like to add, weren't you the same person who was jibing on people's - spelling, grammar, and sentence structure just a few weeks ago?  Get over yourself dude and work on your issues.  Take pride when you accomplish what you want and quit bitching about it.  It makes you stronger...trust me on this.

And no... I didn't proof read this at all homie.

[mecch]

But.. every so often I would get the sarcastic comment of "Oh hey Mr. Father of the year", or "you're a loser of the worst kind".  I admit I took that shit hard, but like Ann said I shared it and if someone does not want to understand the plight of trying to regain ones health back, well what was I suppose to do?

I didn't pussyfoot around about it.  When they came at me I spoke my mind, but I didn't sit here and rant like you are now.

I am not ranting. I am doing just what you said. The shit hits hard and I reminding the people who keep doing it that its out of line. E.g. Speaking my mind. Amen.

[sharkdiver]

You might want to ask for this thread to be moved to the mental health forum. In off topic your just asking for trouble. Hoarding would be categorized as a sign of other "issues " anyways

[Matty the Damned]

The "poor me y'all are so mean" routine Meech is handing out is (whilst par for the course) getting a bit sickly.

So we're a bunch of evil mean fuckers who live only to beat up on him. If this is so and he finds it so traumatic why on earth would he start a thread like this one?

How can he condemn a goodly number of us as bullies of the worst stripe and yet present us with his soft, white belly? I mean that's what this rather gormless thread seems to be.

And yes his kvetching, pissing and moaning about how horrid some folks are predates this cringeworthy thread.

Resolve this small conumdrum and I think we'll all have a better understanding of the complex little poppet who calls himself meech.

MtD

[skeebo1969]

I am not ranting. I am doing just what you said. The shit hits hard and I reminding the people who keep doing it that its out of line. E.g. Speaking my mind. Amen.

Good for you.  Always remember you get what you put in and... If I may add, keep in mind, you tend to be very critical of others.  When doing this and opening up about yourself you could be inviting the unwanted responses you don't desire.

You don't bend at all, but you want everyone else to.

[mecch]

The "poor me y'all are so mean" routine Meech is handing out is (whilst par for the course) getting a bit sickly.

So we're a bunch of evil mean fuckers who live only to beat up on him. If this is so and he finds it so traumatic why on earth would he start a thread like this one?

How can he condemn a goodly number of us as bullies of the worst stripe and yet present us with his soft, white belly? I mean that's what this rather gormless thread seems to be.

And yes his kvetching, pissing and moaning about how horrid some folks are predates this cringeworthy thread.

Resolve this small conumdrum and I think we'll all have a better understanding of the complex little poppet who calls himself meech.

MtD

And there it is. Pretty isn't it. You are bullying me MTD.

And move the thread to mental health, that's totally valid, given the shrink and pills I have to take this summer to get through this passage.  My mom lost this battle and its tragic. I won't. You could learn about it or you could be mean. 

[Matty the Damned]

And there it is. Pretty isn't it. You are bullying me MTD.

And move the thread to mental health, that's totally valid, given the shrink and pills I have to take this summer to get through this passage.  My mom lost this battle and its tragic. I won't. You could learn about it or you could be mean. 

Well, whatever Meechie.

This is all getting a bit too creepy for my tastes.

MtD

[mecch]

Then lay off, you big bully.  I don't claim you bully everyone, but you have a foul mouth and you do bully me.

[Matty the Damned]

Then lay off, you big bully.  I don't claim you bully everyone, but you have a foul mouth and you do bully me.

Foul mouthed I'll cop to. No fucking doubt about that. My profanity is fucking legendary. The Right Wing of my Party refer to me as "Pol Potty Mouth."

But the bully stuff is utter bullshit and I won't wear that tag. As others have noted in other threads you appear to have a growing persecution complex thing happening.

Get some professional help, dollface.

MtD

[sharkdiver]

a thicker skin may be needed here

 especially to survive with this disease.

[BT65]

Mecch, I don't understand why you don't put Matty on ignore if he causes you such stress.  Don't you advise others the same? 

Listen, I've had people come after me with curt (SP) responses.  You have to learn to let things slide.  I agree with the Sweet D.O.,  (Matty), you seem to be getting a huge persecution complex.  Maybe you want people to feel sorry for you?  Maybe you're looking just for sympathy responses? 

Matty pretty much tells it like it is.  He's not afraid of that, and that's one of the reasons I love him so much.  He's even done that with yours truly.  Did I take offense?  No, not at all.  It actually helps to take a closer look at the issue at hand.  I would never say Matty is a bully.  He's a dear friend, and I don't like to see him getting insulted, at all.  It's not justified, and it's not right.

[Andy Velez]

Mecch and Matty, you've both made your opinions and feelings clear. There's no need to expend further energy in repeating same.

Please resist having further exchanges about this as I expect that would likely only escalate matters to no good purpose.

Thanks for your cooperation.

[Rev. Moon]

Zombie thread.

Just saw this video.  Was gonna post it in the "YT links of the day", but figured it made more sense to include it here instead.  Disclosure: this is not meant to offend or hurt the OP in any way.  It is just for S&G.

http://youtu.be/0lFuoOuK5Ok

[skeebo1969]

   I can tell that I had some good smoke in August of 2010......  ahhh the good ole days.  Hey Meccula, you never did post those before and after photos you promised.

   

[Miss Philicia]

wat

[Ann]

Moonie dearest, have you been hoarding this thread?

[Rev. Moon]

Moonie dearest, have you been hoarding this thread?

Yessum.  I had kept it in a plastic container along with threads about poor grammar.   I also have a bazillion boxes full of disclosure threads.  I may donate them to Goodwill at some point.