HIV risk? ARS symptoms

[OHBOY]

I have a series of quick questions I am hoping to get some insight on.  I am a gay male in a relationship with another gay male.  My BF and i do have unprotected sex and have always been monogomous. 10 days ago i had a very brief 'cheat' with another guy.  He was a massage therapist.  He very briefly (~10-15 seconds) gave me fellatio.  He then rubbed his penis against my rectum, pushed against it.  I think he pushed it in once slightly - about 1/2 inch and then i pushed him out right away and it didnt go in beyond that.  Then, i just freaked and we stopped, jacked-off and that was the end of it.  this guy did say he was negative and tested a month before...but who knows.  I decided based on this, not to tell my Boyfriend and to just let it go.  I am now RIDDLED with guilt because i am worried i did put my BF at great risk, even though i thought this was safe enough sex.  Here are my questions:

1.  Now 5 days after sex with my BF and 10 days after my cheat experience (with my BF, i was insertive top, no cumming), he has some inflammed red bumps under his armpits and a rash on his things.  He has no other symptoms or fever or other inflammed nodes.   they look like ingrown hairs, the size of eraser tip and are a bit red.   his derm said it is prob bacteria infection from a hottun he was in 48 hours before.  He said the rash is tender.  I AM FREAKING OUT.  Could this be ARS based on what i did sexually with this other guy?  Is this too soon for ARS for him (5-6 days)?  I feel fine and have no symptoms (14 days into possible exposure).


Please help!  I am so scared!

[OHBOY]

sorry - statement should read 'rash on his thighs', not 'rash on his things'.  thanks

[Ann]

Oh,

You didn't have a risk with the massage person. Although symptoms or even the lack of symptoms means nothing where hiv is concerned, I can tell you the rash you describe is NOTHING like the rash that sometimes accompanies acute hiv infection.

I hope you two tested hiv negative together before you stopped using condoms. Hiv can be asymptomatic for years in some people, so if you're going by a lack of symptoms instead of test results, you might be fooling yourself.

Ann

[RapidRod]

alittleworried36, amazing how you received the same answers isn't it?

[OHBOY]

Hey Ann,

THANK YOU for your response (btw, i find your responses to others on here to be with the most empathy and insight).  

That is the emotional thing i am dealing with.  We have been SUPER careful, tested a lot, discussed this very openly before making these choices and know we are taking each others health into our hands with this decision.  This is why my behavior is unspeakable and I am dealing with taking personal accountability for my actions.  

Would you be willing to explain what the rash DOES look like in acute HIV / ARS?

Also, can you explain why that super brief receptive moment that didnt fully go in isnt enough to worry about?

And finally, can you help me understand if 5-6 days is too early to show ARS?

if these questions bug you - no worries.  i am just curious and dealing with my guilt and pain on this issue and need to feel 'secure' that i didnt wrong my boyfriend beyond the 'cheat'.

thanks.

[OHBOY]

HA TEAK!

Yes, not amazing.  But so true.  You said the same.  I know.  I

 am trying to put this behind me.  This is helping.  I know my post(s) must annoy you, but helping me understand the circumstances of ARS is helpful, nonetheless.

I hope you understand, and sorry if you feel i am abusing the blog land.  but again, this insight is helping me get through this, as did your posts.

thanks

[OHBOY]

Hi.

In general, and KNOWING that HIV DNA PCR is not the effective or approved HIV testing tool, can you please let me know the following:

How accurate would a negative result be at 11 days past exposure on the HIV DNA PCR?

thanks,

[RapidRod]

You answered your own question in the question you posted. How many times do you have to be told you never had a risk?

[OHBOY]

I am just looking for an informed answer on my specific question above, regardless of risk in the original thread, which is why i posted a new thread. 

[Ann]

Oh,

A DNA test is NOT to be used for diagnostic purposes. If you insist on wasting money on a VERY expensive test that you do NOT EVEN NEED, the only PCR test approved for diagnostics is the RNA.

Ann