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Author Topic: Maybe I'm crazy  (Read 9774 times)

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Offline shadowfluid

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  • Posts: 398
  • Mike
Maybe I'm crazy
« on: July 04, 2007, 06:09:48 pm »
Since my diagnosis in May (good numbers) I've been super paranoid about getting sick (staph or pneumonia)...and I wake up today with a fever of 101 and I flip out like I'm dying.  "No you're not going to die", my friend told me. Haha..ugh. Back to bed.
Jan 08       321/23%  VL 92,000 (very mild shingles)
Feb 1 08    Start Truvada+Viramune
March 08    470/33%  VL 320
mid-May     Start Reyataz/Norvir/Truvada
June 08      571/ 40%     VL   80
August 08   585/ 33%     VL >50
Nov  Lab error!!!!!!!!wah.
Jan 09        535      Undetectable
March 11     756

Offline Cerrid

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  • Posts: 500
  • only as good as your last haircut
Re: Maybe I'm crazy
« Reply #1 on: July 05, 2007, 04:29:39 am »
I don't think you're crazy. The first weeks and months following the diagnosis are no easy time. Your mind plays tricks on your body and creates monsters and demons. Most of the time, it helps if you find yourself a counsellor who is used to this situation. After a while, you get accustomed to your diagnosis, the anxiety fades and you'll see that life goes on. No need to worry mate, many more have made the same experience, gone through the dark valley but now are back, alive and kicking. Never give up.
"Boredom is always counterrevolutionary. Always." (Guy Debord)

Offline Ann

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    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Maybe I'm crazy
« Reply #2 on: July 05, 2007, 04:34:01 am »
Shadow,

You're still going to get ordinary, run of the mill colds and flu from time to time and it's nothing to freak out about. Saying that, most of us go through this at first so you're not alone.

Most of the illnesses that are dangerous to us are ones that you will only become acquainted with if your counts go below 200. Hopefully you will try out the hiv meds before this ever happens.

These illnesses are referred to as Opportunistic Infections, or OIs for short. There is a section on them in the Lessons. A normal headcold or flu is NOT an OI.

For myself, I got over the paranoia after educating myself as much as I could about the virus - and time... time will help too.

Of course if you are still worried about a fever or anything else going on with your body, by all means contact your doctor for further advice. When in doubt, see your doctor.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

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HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline minus_25

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  • Posts: 32
Re: Maybe I'm crazy
« Reply #3 on: July 06, 2007, 01:31:55 am »
I'm sorry, I lol'd when I read your post.  I remember going through the paranoia phase. Right after diagnosis, I would notice any little change in or on my body and think it's because of the hiv, or that my body won't be able to heal some very minor thing because of hiv.  The paranoia will subside with time, I promise.

I don't know if I would consider a fever minor though.  I guess it would depend on how high it is.  Just be sure and tell your HIV doctor about it.

I hope it your fever breaks soon.

Offline milker

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Re: Maybe I'm crazy
« Reply #4 on: July 06, 2007, 12:26:59 pm »
Hi Shadow,

since you're reading this, your not dead, so I hope you're feeling better? Like minus said, everything that we used to take as an annoyance now seems to be HIV related. You haven't seen my panic about little bruises on my arms, everybody on here must have laughed their ass off.

Like before, if the fever is not going down, just see your doctor. Your latest numbers certainly not suggest anything HIV related.

I know it's not easy to stop thinking about HIV, but everyone on here will tell you that although it will be part of your life, it will fade out, you won't think about it 24h/day, and sooner than you expect :)

Milker.
mid-dec: stupid ass
mid-jan: seroconversion
mid-feb: poz
mar 07: cd4 432 (35%) vl 54000
may 07: cd4 399 (28%) vl 27760
jul 07: cd4 403 (26%) vl 99241
oct 07: cd4 353 (24%) vl 29993
jan 08: cd4 332 (26%) vl 33308
mar 08: cd4 392 (23%) vl 75548
jun 08: cd4 325 (27%) vl 45880
oct 08: cd4 197 (20%) vl 154000 <== aids diagnosis
nov 2 08 start Atripla
nov 30 08: cd4 478 (23%) vl 1880 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
feb 19 09: cd4 398 (24%) vl 430 getting there!
apr 23 09: cd4 604 (29%) vl 50 woohoo :D :D
jul 30 09: cd4 512 (29%) vl undetectable :D :D
may 27 10: cd4 655 (32%) vl undetectable :D :D

Now accepting applications from blowjob ninjas™

Offline shadowfluid

  • Member
  • Posts: 398
  • Mike
Re: Maybe I'm crazy
« Reply #5 on: July 06, 2007, 02:38:19 pm »
So I have some nasty throat infection I'm on antibiotics for...I went to the school doctor as opposed to driving 35 miles to see the HIV doctor. I think I'm going to call him to let him know...thanks to everyone who replied.
Jan 08       321/23%  VL 92,000 (very mild shingles)
Feb 1 08    Start Truvada+Viramune
March 08    470/33%  VL 320
mid-May     Start Reyataz/Norvir/Truvada
June 08      571/ 40%     VL   80
August 08   585/ 33%     VL >50
Nov  Lab error!!!!!!!!wah.
Jan 09        535      Undetectable
March 11     756

Offline thunter34

  • Member
  • Posts: 7,374
  • His name is Carl.
Re: Maybe I'm crazy
« Reply #6 on: July 06, 2007, 02:43:35 pm »
Meant to reply to this before.  I know what you mean about being freaked about getting sick.  I was terrified to leave the house at first.  And it was cold and flu season.  Every little *cough* from someone near sent me into a mental frenzy.  I even put on a little mask sometimes and walked around looking like milker's avatar.  Heck, I even went into a mental spin when an internet commercial came on & they talked about "VIRUS PROTECTION".  I was totally mentally tweaked.
AIDS isn't for sissies.

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: Maybe I'm crazy
« Reply #7 on: July 06, 2007, 03:21:01 pm »
I even put on a little mask sometimes and walked around looking like milker's avatar. 

Oh is THAT what that is?  I thought it was a pashmina scarf.
"I’ve slept with enough men to know that I’m not gay"

Offline shadowfluid

  • Member
  • Posts: 398
  • Mike
Re: Maybe I'm crazy
« Reply #8 on: July 06, 2007, 05:29:43 pm »
Wow thunter34...just wow.
Jan 08       321/23%  VL 92,000 (very mild shingles)
Feb 1 08    Start Truvada+Viramune
March 08    470/33%  VL 320
mid-May     Start Reyataz/Norvir/Truvada
June 08      571/ 40%     VL   80
August 08   585/ 33%     VL >50
Nov  Lab error!!!!!!!!wah.
Jan 09        535      Undetectable
March 11     756

Offline thunter34

  • Member
  • Posts: 7,374
  • His name is Carl.
Re: Maybe I'm crazy
« Reply #9 on: July 06, 2007, 05:44:34 pm »
yep.  that's how it can be when you've only got a few dozen t-cells & falling.  it was pretty much an anxiety trip until i was able to get onto some meds and start climbing back upward.  you wrote that you have some good numbers, though.  mine were not hot, so i felt pretty vulnerable to attack.
AIDS isn't for sissies.

Offline J.R.E.

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  • Posts: 8,207
  • Positive since 1985, joined forums 12/03
Re: Maybe I'm crazy
« Reply #10 on: July 06, 2007, 09:26:51 pm »
Hello Shadow,

Welcome to the forums. Is that temperature coming back down? Sorry to hear about the throat infection, those anti-biotics should start working soon for you. Just make sure to take them on time, and continue taking them ! Don't stop taking them , because you are feeling better.


Hope your feeling better soon----Ray
Current Meds ; Viramune / Epzicom Eliquis, Diltiazem. Pravastatin 80mg, Ezetimibe. UPDATED 2/18/24
 Tested positive in 1985,.. In October of 2003, My t-cell count was 16, Viral load was over 500,000, Percentage at that time was 5%. I started on  HAART on October 24th, 2003.

 As of Oct 2nd, 2023, Viral load Undetectable.
CD 4 @676 /  CD4 % @ 18 %
Lymphocytes,absolute-3815 (within range)


72 YEARS YOUNG

Offline shadowfluid

  • Member
  • Posts: 398
  • Mike
Re: Maybe I'm crazy
« Reply #11 on: July 07, 2007, 02:59:25 am »
Hello Shadow,

Welcome to the forums. Is that temperature coming back down? Sorry to hear about the throat infection, those anti-biotics should start working soon for you. Just make sure to take them on time, and continue taking them ! Don't stop taking them , because you are feeling better.


Hope your feeling better soon----Ray
Yeah I'm feeling better. Antibiotics make me feel sooo fatigued. Making lots of iced white tea with honey. I get throat infections ever year around the same time. I don't get it...
Jan 08       321/23%  VL 92,000 (very mild shingles)
Feb 1 08    Start Truvada+Viramune
March 08    470/33%  VL 320
mid-May     Start Reyataz/Norvir/Truvada
June 08      571/ 40%     VL   80
August 08   585/ 33%     VL >50
Nov  Lab error!!!!!!!!wah.
Jan 09        535      Undetectable
March 11     756

Offline J.R.E.

  • Member
  • Posts: 8,207
  • Positive since 1985, joined forums 12/03
Re: Maybe I'm crazy
« Reply #12 on: July 07, 2007, 03:23:30 pm »
Since my diagnosis in May (good numbers) I've been super paranoid about getting sick (staph or pneumonia)...and I wake up today with a fever of 101 and I flip out like I'm dying.  "No you're not going to die", my friend told me. Haha..ugh. Back to bed.


Hello Again Shadow,

I can't add much more to what the others have already mentioned to you. Things will eventually settle down, and that "paranoia" will also diminish.

One thing you can do is to talk to your doctor, and find out what immunizations are available to you as an HIV infected person. This may be the ideal time for some immunizations, since you are newly infected.

There are several immunizations that are available to you. Click on the link below, and talk to your doctor. This is in PDF format .

http://aidsinfo.nih.gov/contentfiles/Recommended_Immunizations_FS_en.pdf



Take care------Ray
Current Meds ; Viramune / Epzicom Eliquis, Diltiazem. Pravastatin 80mg, Ezetimibe. UPDATED 2/18/24
 Tested positive in 1985,.. In October of 2003, My t-cell count was 16, Viral load was over 500,000, Percentage at that time was 5%. I started on  HAART on October 24th, 2003.

 As of Oct 2nd, 2023, Viral load Undetectable.
CD 4 @676 /  CD4 % @ 18 %
Lymphocytes,absolute-3815 (within range)


72 YEARS YOUNG

Offline shadowfluid

  • Member
  • Posts: 398
  • Mike
Re: Maybe I'm crazy
« Reply #13 on: July 07, 2007, 05:23:34 pm »
Got all my immunizations already. :) thanks
Jan 08       321/23%  VL 92,000 (very mild shingles)
Feb 1 08    Start Truvada+Viramune
March 08    470/33%  VL 320
mid-May     Start Reyataz/Norvir/Truvada
June 08      571/ 40%     VL   80
August 08   585/ 33%     VL >50
Nov  Lab error!!!!!!!!wah.
Jan 09        535      Undetectable
March 11     756

 


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