A bit nervous about infection.

[PolyglotAmi]

Hello Forum.

Just a bit of background info on me. I'm 30 years old and homosexual. I always always always have protected sex but recently had an experience that's made me a bit nervous.

After a long night of partying, I went to a guy's house and things got steamy. He proceeded to perform oral sex on me and I performed mouth-to-anus oral sex on him. He then pulled out gel but not a condom, so I got out one of mine. We had sex for a while (with me as the top) and I came into the condom a bit but kept going. The condom slid some at the end but the head of my penis was well covered the entire time.

A week later, I started to have a white discharge come from my penis. I went to the doctor and it was confirmed that I had gonorrhea. I called to ask the guy if he had any symptoms and he says he didn't. I asked him his HIV status and he said he has been positive for many years but is taking meds and as of his last check-up is still undetectable. 

Three and a half weeks from that night, I have been having some strange symptoms. Tiredness, achiness where my lymph nodes (armpits and neck) are, a bit of a cough, sore muscles and a general malaise feeling. No fever or rash though.   

Questions:

1. What is the likelihood of my having contracted HIV in this scenario?
2. When a condom slides, is it a concern for the active partner as well?
3. How indicative are these symptoms really of possible HIV infection?

Many thanks ahead of time to any responders. You guys are doing great work.

[Joe K]

Poly,

You did not have a risk of HIV infection from protected sex.  Condom movement is not a concern, unless the condoms fails or is fully removed from the penis.  None of this happened in your situation and so you had no risk.

What you did find is that STDs can be much easier to contract.

Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to HIV testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start.  As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine HIV tests to return with negative results.

Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than HIV.  Some of the other STDs can be present with no obvious symptoms, so the only way to know for sure is to test.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid HIV infection. It really is that simple!

Joe

[PolyglotAmi]

Thank you for you fast response, Joe. I really appreciate it.

Is it possible the to asymptomatically carry gonorrhea and then show symptoms at some point later?

I guess I'll just get a test at the three month mark to be sure. I feel reassured though.

Thanks again!

[Ann]

Poly,

YES! It is totally, absolutely possible to have asymptomatic gonorrhea. Chlamydia can also be asymptomatic. Up to 80% of men never experience any symptoms of these two bacterial infections. And yes, they can cause symptoms at a later date.

Gonorrhea can infect the oral cavity and therefore be transmitted orally, chlamydia not so much. Oral gonorrhea can cause a sore throat, but it often doesn't.

And what's more, primary syphilis symptoms often go unnoticed. Syphilis causes a small sore (called a chancre) that is PAINLESS, so if you don't see it, you would never realise it was there. (It can hide in your mouth, in your anus, between your ass-cheeks, somewhere on your scrotum etc.) Syphilis will ultimately kill you if you do not test for it and get it treated. And UNLIKE hiv, it only takes skin-to-skin contact to become infected with syphilis.

STIs other than hiv are MUCH more easily transmitted than hiv and can be asymptomatic, or the symptoms are so mild they get shrugged off or not noticed at all. Sometimes they can be mistaken for primary hiv - such as in the case of syphilis which is called "the great imitator" because it can mimic so many other illnesses.

And people wonder why we always insist that sexually active adults should be having regular, routine, COMPLETE sexual health check ups. Hiv isn't the only dangerous STI out there. Untreated syphilis can kill, and untreated gonorrhea and chlamydia can cause infertility and arthritis. Yes, you read that right. Arthritis.

Hiv is MUCH more difficult to transmit than any of these other STIs, thankfully.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!!!

Ann