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Author Topic: NO LIFE INSURANCE !  (Read 10625 times)

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Offline netta

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NO LIFE INSURANCE !
« on: November 04, 2009, 02:05:04 pm »
Believe it or not, I am one LTS who does not have life insurance. I don't know how to get any being HIV+.I don't want to be a burden to my family, although I know they would come up with the money to bury me, but it worries me to no end. I have been on disability for 15 years. I am 51 years old, been poz for 20 +(my boyfriend died 1987 of aids) I was diagnosed 1991,on meds 1994, 15 years. Does anyone have any sugguestions, I am even enbrassed to talk about it here. Please help! :-[
"to thine own self be true"

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: LIFE INSURANCE
« Reply #1 on: November 04, 2009, 02:07:39 pm »
Yeah, I don't have any either.  I'm sure you could make arrangements in advance and have everything pre-paid.  Of course, you're on your own in terms of figuring out where/how to go about that in your own locality.
"I’ve slept with enough men to know that I’m not gay"

Offline netta

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Re: NO LIFE INSURANCE !
« Reply #2 on: November 04, 2009, 02:22:27 pm »
Yeah, I could if only I could afford to, my little check is barely enough to live off,would be nice to find a low cost insurance or something!
Thanks for your respond!
"to thine own self be true"

Offline leatherman

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Re: NO LIFE INSURANCE !
« Reply #3 on: November 04, 2009, 05:00:38 pm »
I'm at LTS too. Diagnosed with AIDS in 93 and buried my first partner in 94; but here I am at 47 still alive and kicking.  ;D

Unfortunately, I just had to request/plead/beg/borrow and receive contributions to cremate my second partner when he unexpectedly went into the hospital in Mar 08 and passed away just two months later in May 08 from AIDS. So I have had to think about and deal with this issue of what to do about myself when I pass away.

When I first was diagnosed with AIDS at 31 yrs old and was deadly ill, personally I didn't really think about the matter and figured if I was dying so young, my family could just deal with the consequences. But now it look like I have a while to go (WooHoo!), I've seen the consequences first hand, and at 47 it's fairly irresponsible of me to lay this burden at the feet of whatever family may be remaining when I pass away.

I just recently moved from OH back down to the Carolinas, in part because of the passing of my partner, so my plans aren't 100% together yet but perhaps my plan could help you see an option for yourself.

So my solution has been three-fold: 1)money, 2)cremation; and 3)memorial

1) The first part is collecting the money. Since right after my partner passed away, I have been setting aside money (I'm also on disability, so it's only been a little bit here and there) into a savings account. Each Christmas and bday, I have requested, in lieu of any gifts, that I would like a donation to my fund.

2) The second part is to find a cremation organization in your area. (check the internet, but most importantly check the phone book and your local organizations.) Many have plans that you pre-register with so that they handle all the details when you pass away. For anywhere between $800 - $1500, many of these companies that you pre-register with (sometimes pre-pay and some even with payments plans) will provide body transportation, cremation, death certificates, and even obituary listings in the newspapers.

Currently, as I said since I just moved, I am looking at two SC cremation organizations. One only works within a 300 mile radius, and I think we're 315 miles away. The other one is about $200 more; but that may be my only option. Fortunately, I'm not on death's doorway right now, and with Christmas right around the corner, I'll have some more money in my fund soon and will be acquiring a plan hopefully at the first of 2010.

3) As far as funerals, you could pay even more the chapel, a viewing, and a church service of course, and even have a costly burial. I would kindly suggest what was suggested to me and how we said goodbye to my partner. I simply held my own memorial service. Though most cemeteries frown on "unsanctioned" memorials and scattering of ashes on graves (they would prefer your money), anyone can hold a memorial service anywhere.

With friends gathered at the grave side of my first partner, I spoke an eulogy I had prepared and then several other close friends said remarks of their own. I then scattered his ashes. Afterwards, we covered the grave in $25 worth of red and white carnation that I had purchased, before releasing $25 worth of red heart-shaped and silver mylar helium balloons, with little signed notes attached to the strings, from my guests saying their good byes to my partner.

Afterwards we all went back to my house, where in lieu of a normal pool party we used to hold, I had a cookout for my guests. My guests got to look through old photo albums I had placed around the house and watched through a CD worth of images from scanned pix that played on the TV, while we all told stories and remembered the wonderful man my partner had been.
(all of this is chronicled on my blog at http://reigningpages.com/leatherman, use the calendar at the left to go to May 2008, then jump down to Week Five)

So now, 1) I've got nearly enough money saved up now to cover the cost (I'm opting for an obit in the paper so my total will be around $1100). 2)I'm about to sign up for a cremation plan at the first of the year. 3)I wrote up instructions for a memorial service (and with these instructions am leaving $50 for flowers and balloons), and I have 2 friends and 2 family members (you never know who will go when, so I made plenty of arrangments, just in case ;)) that I have contacted and who have promised to organize and hold the memorial service for me at my passing. (we've all already been to the grave once for Randy, and then for Jim, so they all know how to get back there with my ashes too ;) )

I hope this information helps or gives you another idea about how to handle the situation of what to do when you pass away. It's never an easy thing to think or talk about; but it's something that'll happen to ALL of us no matter what health problems you might or might not have. I've personally felt how terrible the burden is when it's left to someone unexpectedly, so any pre-planning and arrangements that you can make beforehand will relieve a unnecessary burden from your loved ones when they are already grieving your loss.

lordy, I sound like a funeral director or something, don't I? LOL But in a way that's exactly what I was. ;) If you'd like to talk any more about this, I'll be happy to. You can always PM me.
leatherman (aka Michael)

We were standing all alone
You were leaning in to speak to me
Acting like a mover shaker
Dancing to Madonna then you kissed me
And I think about it all the time
- Darren Hayes, "Chained to You"

Offline aztecan

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Re: NO LIFE INSURANCE !
« Reply #4 on: November 10, 2009, 10:12:47 pm »
I am even enbrassed to talk about it here. Please help! :-[

My dear, never be ashamed to discuss something here, especially in the long-term forum. We are all in the same leaky canoe.

I still have a small insurance policy, but it ends when I am 72, I think, if I live to see 72.

I like leatherman's idea of setting up a fund or a savings account and building it up as you can. One caveat I would add is to have someone else on the account along with yourself. Maybe a parent, sibling, etc.

If you don't, when you die, the money in the account will most likely have to go through probate if you die intestate.

Just something to mull over.

HUGS,

Mark
"May your life preach more loudly than your lips."
~ William Ellery Channing (Unitarian Minister)

Offline leatherman

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Re: NO LIFE INSURANCE !
« Reply #5 on: November 10, 2009, 10:30:34 pm »
One caveat I would add is to have someone else on the account along with yourself.
that is a good idea  ;) just in case.

actually the plan I proposed has me living long enough to spend that money ;D to pre-register and pre-purchase the cremation/obit etc then my surviving loved ones don't have to worry about any of that. They'll only have a phone number to call the agency who will arrange for a graceful pickup and handling. Plus, if you don't pre-register it usually costs  $50-200 more. ;)

If I haven't already done it just before I pass away, the people I have chosen to handle my memorial know at my death to grab my bank card and to remove the $50 or so in that account to cover the expense of balloons and flowers. (I'm too poor for there to be anything to probate anyway. LOL)
leatherman (aka Michael)

We were standing all alone
You were leaning in to speak to me
Acting like a mover shaker
Dancing to Madonna then you kissed me
And I think about it all the time
- Darren Hayes, "Chained to You"

Offline BT65

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Re: NO LIFE INSURANCE !
« Reply #6 on: November 11, 2009, 05:50:08 am »
I don't have life insurance either.  But, when I went through the wasting back in '94, my aunt paid for my services at a local funeral home, and I still have those papers.  So, I'm assuming I'm still covered.  I wouldn't know where to look for life insurance.  I kind of think we're SOL on that.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline Nico

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Re: NO LIFE INSURANCE !
« Reply #7 on: November 12, 2009, 01:34:33 pm »
Netta,
Are you a member of AARP?  If so, you can apply for guaranteed life insurance through NY Life.  The benefits are limited for the first two years in the event of death, however after two years the life benefit you applied for kicks in.  There are no health questions to answer.  The link is below.

https://www.nylaarp.com/products/gal_brief.asp

Good luck
Poz since 1990.

Offline AlanBama

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  • Alabama: the 'other' 3rd World Country!
Re: NO LIFE INSURANCE !
« Reply #8 on: November 12, 2009, 01:49:27 pm »
I took out a $15,000 'term life' insurance policy in 1999; my premiums had gone up to about $54 a quarter.   I was notifed last month that my 'term' had ended!  Hard to believe I had that insurance for ten long years; never dreamed I wouldn't need to use it for burial expenses.

Now, I have to option to 'convert' (no questions asked) to a whole life policy.  My premiums are going up to $101.90 a quarter.  (none to thrilled about that)   I suppose I will keep it going.

I am lucky enough to be part of a group life plan at my part-time job; as a lay employee of the Diocese of Alabama, I am entitled to $45,000 of life insurance!  They pay my premiums (about $19 a month); this is the one and only "benefit" I have on this job.   But jobs come and go; I may or may not be working here when I die.  It's not something I can 'count on for sure', so I think I need to keep my whole life policy in effect, just in case.   If I am working here when I die, it will be a nice thing for my partner and family.

Good luck in finding something, Netta.   I sometimes see ads for "no questions asked" coverage, so keep your eyes and ears open....

Hugs, Alan
"Remember my sentimental friend that a heart is not judged by how much you love, but by how much you are loved by others." - The Wizard of Oz

Offline pos2007

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Re: NO LIFE INSURANCE !
« Reply #9 on: November 12, 2009, 09:28:31 pm »
Life  insurance  for  HIV  positive people  is available  In the  U.K. as of earlier  this  year. I  am   sure  there are stipulations. In a matter of  time I expect it  to be available  in  the  U.S.  . Once  the actuaries figure  out  how  much to  gig  us  for,  figure  out how  many  will   have  to  drop out  because  they  can no-longer afford  premiums after paying  for a few  years  and  find a way to sell  the  packages  to  wall street.
Diagnosed  CD4 138 VL. 38,000
Partner Diagnosed CD4 <20  VL.  488,000

Offline BT65

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Re: NO LIFE INSURANCE !
« Reply #10 on: November 13, 2009, 07:06:29 am »
Pos2007, I was wondering, since your avvy has "2007" in it, is that when you were diagnosed?
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline Moffie65

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Re: NO LIFE INSURANCE !
« Reply #11 on: November 14, 2009, 10:18:10 am »
Netta,

I don't know how you feel about cremation, but the Neptune Society will do it for about 1500 dollars.  You can pay in advance over time, or else other means can be done.  If you happen to be a Vet, it is even cheaper.  I have chosen this route, simply because life insurance and regular burial for my corpse is a complete waste of money.

My ashes are scheduled to be shipped to Kenya and spread over the foothills of Kilimanjaro, my home as a young adult.

Hope you can resolve soon.  Stress as you well know is a complete downer for us HIV'ers.

Love,
Tim.
The Bible contains 6 admonishments to homosexuals,
and 362 to heterosexuals.
This doesn't mean that God doesn't love heterosexuals,
It's just that they need more supervision.
Lynn Lavne

Offline beau1200

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Re: NO LIFE INSURANCE !
« Reply #12 on: November 16, 2009, 01:41:50 am »
I went on disability in Nov 2007.  I have continued to pay for cobra for health insurance.  I found out that my disability (UNUM) will pay out 3 months worth of what I am getting for disability.  I also found out that if I keep the cobra, then convert it to an individual policy, they will pay a months salary when I die.  That is what I hope to pay for my funeral with so that I don't have to burden my family. 

My broker, a good friend, told me it wasn't worth the cost of getting or keeping my life insurance policy from my previous employeer.  I am not close to my family, and if I have money when I die, i will donate it, so life insurance isn't really that important to me, given my situation. 

Best Wishes!

Offline toren

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Re: NO LIFE INSURANCE !
« Reply #13 on: November 18, 2009, 05:23:52 pm »
I have found rewarding the many perspectives on this subject, and my own do not differ greatly, if at all.  I am a LTS (20 years from date infection) and what with working for an employer who went bankrupt, and another (current) whose policy for employee group life insurance has a cut-off at age 65, I have little in the way of life insurance.

But I am comfortable with cremation, or even better the process developed in Sweden, using liquid nitrogen to freeze the body which then shatters easily -- so dig a hole, put what is left of me there, and plant a tree!  What has swung me over to "minimal remains disposal" is the knowledge that I am taking up space in a traditional grave, and that wherever I am, I would prefer not to be a perpetual cost or source of guilt for my daughter not visiting my grave.  I might be buried in one part of Canada, and she living in another far way.  The cost of cremation?  Far less than traditional burial.  Driving south out of Winnipeg today, I passed a small building which had a sign announcing "Immediate Cremation: $995.00 (!).  Sounds good to me.  We live on in the hearts of those we love and who love us.  What greater legacy can there be?

Offline AndyArrow

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Re: NO LIFE INSURANCE !
« Reply #14 on: November 19, 2009, 03:38:28 am »
I also have no life insurance and will either have to think about pre-paying somewhere or donating this lovely bod to science.  ;)

One thing to keep in mind for those who are NOT currently on disability is that a life insurance policy is considered an asset and could actually be used against you in denying benefits.  I know this isn't your situation Netta but I just wanted to throw that out there.
It is not the arrival that matters.  It is the journey along the way. -- Michel Montaigne

Offline hoyle63

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Re: NO LIFE INSURANCE !
« Reply #15 on: November 19, 2009, 10:31:05 am »
Greetings fellow LTS!
I went on disability in 2006. I COBRA'd my life insurance policy from the hospital. The premiums are ~140 bucks a month, but I'll pay it now while I can afford it. The death benefit is somewhere around 350k. Thought about even getting my beneficiaries to chip in if it gets more expensive. I took the life insurance out when I was able to qualify and have maintained it. I feel fortunate for having it.

About your partner's memorial. I think your idea was a very respectful and personalized service that your partner would have been very proud of. Only us can remember them like they deserve to be remembered, not a boiler plate service and eulogy from a funeral home. I lost my second husband in 2005 and did something similar with the exception of his ashes. I still have them. Funerals and memorials are for the living anyway.
surviving since 1981!

Hoyle

Offline leatherman

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Re: NO LIFE INSURANCE !
« Reply #16 on: November 19, 2009, 11:50:58 am »
Greetings fellow LTS!
Greetings Hoyle! and welcome to the forums :) you shouldn't be such a stranger around here  ;)
(sorry to be greeting you in such a morbid thread though LOL)

I lost my second husband in 2005
as a two-time "widower", let me say how sorry and sad I am to hear that. :'( My best wishes and sympathies go out to you.

I ... did something similar with the exception of his ashes. I still have them.
since we're in a rather morbid thread, I will share something else that I don't often get to discuss. Frankly, I was amazed at how much "cremains" remained (about 6lbs or so!), so I didn't scatter all of Jim's ashes upon Randy's grave.

I have a lovely ceramic decanter-style vase/urn that Randy had painted, that I filled up with Jim's ashes and sealed it. I filled up another small glass jar (like a lg baby food jar) and hid that very far under the rafters in the attic of the house. Jim's parents had died young and bequeathed him that house, so he lived there all his life. While he was in the hospital, he had continually begged me to take him home, which I finally did after 60 hellish days. And that's where he passed away. I thought it was appropriate then for part of Jim stay in the home that he so longed to return to. (Though I moved from that house and am living back in SC now, it gives me some peace and comfort knowing that Jim is still "at home" in OH). The rest of the ashes were scattered during the memorial. Today I have the filled urn on a shelf, along with some pictures of both Jim and Randy; and the empty cardboard box from the crematorium is stored away with the boxes of memorabilia from both of my guys.

Funerals and memorials are for the living anyway.
Exactly! Everytime I hear someone say that they don't want any service, funeral or fuss, etc, I explain that after they're gone, it's really not about them at all  - it's about the people left behind. And they are going to want to grieve, so it's just rude to ever think that when you die (since YOU won't be there) that there shouldn't be some sort of service for your friends and family to attend.
leatherman (aka Michael)

We were standing all alone
You were leaning in to speak to me
Acting like a mover shaker
Dancing to Madonna then you kissed me
And I think about it all the time
- Darren Hayes, "Chained to You"

Offline jm1953

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Re: NO LIFE INSURANCE !
« Reply #17 on: November 19, 2009, 09:55:21 pm »
Believe it or not, I am one LTS who does not have life insurance. I don't know how to get any being HIV+.I don't want to be a burden to my family, although I know they would come up with the money to bury me, but it worries me to no end. I have been on disability for 15 years. I am 51 years old, been poz for 20 +(my boyfriend died 1987 of aids) I was diagnosed 1991,on meds 1994, 15 years. Does anyone have any sugguestions, I am even enbrassed to talk about it here. Please help! :-[

So sorry about the loss of your boyfriend.  Two of my very best friends were died in 1987 and I was diagnosed the same year.

As one member said, no need to be embarrassed to talk about this.  It's important.

I have four Life Insurance Policies for $10,000 each all of which do not ask health questions.  One is through AARP which you would qualify for.  Another through Peoples Life Insurance, and two through Mutual of Omaha.  Might give them a holler.

You'll be o.k.!!!

Best,

Jeff
Positive 29 years. Diagnosed 10/1987.  Current CD 4: 720: Viral load: almost 100.  Current drug regimen, Tivicay, Emtriva, Endurant, Wellbutrin, Clonazepam, Uloric, Losartan Potassium,Allegra, Ambien, Testosterone, Nandrolone, Vicodin, Benedryl, Aspirin, lots of vitamin supplements.

Offline netta

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Re: NO LIFE INSURANCE !
« Reply #18 on: November 20, 2009, 12:54:50 pm »
I have been sick so pardon my late respond, also I forgot about this thread!charge that too my age LOL,Thank you all so much, I am looking into aarp and others, sounds good and blessings to all of you who have lost loved ones.
« Last Edit: November 20, 2009, 12:59:17 pm by netta »
"to thine own self be true"

Offline leatherman

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Re: NO LIFE INSURANCE !
« Reply #19 on: November 20, 2009, 01:24:09 pm »
charge that too my age LOL
it's never about your age, honey, it's all about the HIV brain fog that made you forget.  ;)
(that way you can still claim to be 35 and still have an excuse  :-*)
leatherman (aka Michael)

We were standing all alone
You were leaning in to speak to me
Acting like a mover shaker
Dancing to Madonna then you kissed me
And I think about it all the time
- Darren Hayes, "Chained to You"

Offline bwd1960

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Re: NO LIFE INSURANCE !
« Reply #20 on: December 01, 2009, 06:37:43 pm »
I don't have life ins. either. there is some you can buy ,however it is expensive.Look it up on the net. ;)
living with this since 1996.

 


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