POZ Community Forums

HIV Prevention and Testing => Do I Have HIV? => Topic started by: jj on November 13, 2006, 05:21:12 am

Title: worried
Post by: jj on November 13, 2006, 05:21:12 am
About one week ago i did something really stupid. I was in sydney and while there i got fairly drunk and visited a sex worker.

It turned out that she was an IV drug user. I asked because she seemed to have a very strange eyes. As a result of my suspicion i asked her if she was and she said yes. I asked her did she use clean needles and she replied that she did and that they were supplied to her by the Government. As a result of this i decided not to have intercourse with the women. Instead i decided that i would only have protected oral sex performed on me with a massage.

After the incident i checked the condom and it was fully intact. I was just wondering if there was any risk from this incident?

One thing that worries me is this ; suppose that she had blood in her mouth. What if the blood went from her mouth to condom, then from the condom to her hand, and then from her hand to my thighs, where there were very small one day and a half old cuts? The cuts were tiny. Could i get HIV from this? Would the cuts be too old to fascilitate a transmission?

What do u think

Thanks

JJ
Title: Re: Worried Sick
Post by: Ann on November 13, 2006, 06:14:56 am
jj,

Getting a blowjob, with or without a condom, is not a risk for hiv infection. Saliva is not infectious and for this reason, you need not worry about the mouth to condom to hand to thigh scenario you present. And yes, small, old cuts do not present an entry for hiv.

Please read through the Welcome Thread (http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=220.0) and follow the Transmission Lesson link found there so you can have a better understanding of what is risky and what isn't. Here's what else you need to know to avoid hiv infection:

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL STIs together. To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with a sexually transmitted infection.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

While you do NOT need to test over this specific incident, anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results. Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Ann
Title: Re: Worried Sick
Post by: jj on November 16, 2006, 12:20:32 am
but what happens if there was blood in her mouth?How surprised would u be if i got infected in this manner?

Thanks

JJ
Title: Re: Worried Sick
Post by: Ann on November 16, 2006, 07:04:20 am
jj,

Unless you punched her in the mouth before she gave you head, there is no way there'd be enough blood present to cause concern.

Getting a blowjob, no matter what sort of spin you want to put on it, is NOT a risk for hiv infection. Not only is saliva not infectious, but it also contains over a dozen different proteins and enzymes that break down any hiv that might be present and render it unable to infect.

Ann
Title: Re: Worried Sick
Post by: jj on November 20, 2006, 02:53:54 am
lets make some assumptions:

1) assume there was blood in her mouth.
2) assume that it got onto the condom.
3) assume that it got onto her hand.
4) assume it got from her hand to my thigh.
5) assume the blood was infected

question : would the virus still be active once it had reached my thigh?

Why do u say that transmission must take place inside the body when people have bee known to get it from giving head?
Title: Re: Worried Sick
Post by: RapidRod on November 20, 2006, 07:21:59 am
Lets not assume anything. You didn't have a risk and that is it. End of story.
Title: Re: Worried Sick
Post by: Andy Velez on November 20, 2006, 08:35:49 am
Stop with the what ifs. Receiving oral is not a risk for transmission. Even allowing for all sorts of what ifs, in the entire history of the epidemic and an uncountable number of oral sex episodes later, there has never been a single case of transmission in this manner.

It's safe to say you aren't going to make history by becoming the first, no matter what ifs your mind comes up with.

There's no need for testing. Get on with your life. No kidding.
Title: worried
Post by: jj on November 26, 2006, 12:01:59 am


Well I am on my travels at the moment. I am in Melbourne and I did something last night that I should’nt have done. I went to a legal brothel and shagged the ass off this Aussie girl when drunk.

When the sex was all over I got into a long conversation with her about STD’s. I asked her if she was scared of STD’s and she responded with a rather forcefull yes answer. I asked her if she always used condoms and she said that she did. I asked her if she ever got offers to have unprotected sex for extra money and she said yes. She said she always rejects the offer and she referred to such people as idiots because they could never know what she had or did not have. She seemed quite angry just thinking about such people. She said she had had an offer for unprotected sex just before I came in. I asked her if she ever had a condom breakage and she said that she did and got pregnant as a result of it. I asked if she ever had an STD and she said that she once had crabs. She told me that she always uses lube in order to prevent condom breakage. She said that she sometimes use two condoms at a go but she that eneded up stopping that for a reason that I can’t remember. She said that she would never have unprotected sex for extra money because it just wasn’t woth the risk. She seemed to be fairly well informed about STD’s. She pointed out to me that it wasn’t just HIV that one should worry about. She mentioned Syphillis, Chlamydia and Gonnerrehea. She says that she does not engage in anal sex. Over all she seemed quite wary of STD’s.

Okay so her is my first question: 1) does the information in the above indicate to you that she is vary unlikely to be infected with HIV?

Before I had the above conversation with her I engaged in protected oral and protected vaginal intercourse with the sex worker that lasted about 20 mins. The session started off with the worker giving me head. I have now fears concerning an infection here. After I had done that I proceded to do her doggy style. I kept an eye on the condom while doing it. She for the most part got had her hand placed between her legs on the condom. I think she was just making sure that it was still on and secure. However she did not always have her hand there and I did not always have my eyes on the condom. I just checked back and forward now and again. And likewise she just put her hand there now and again to check. I also touched the condom to make sure that it was secure.

Having finished the doggy position I asked her to turn around so that I could put her on her and shag her in the traditional position. That is the position whereby she is on her back with her legs spread. I shagged her in this position and again I an eye to make sure that the condom was still on for the duration of the fun.

After that sex scenario I asked her to suck me off again. She agreed but said that we had to change the condom. I’m not sure why she wanted to change the condom. Maybe she felt that it would be difficult to suck me off with there being lube and vaginal fluids on the condom. She may have felt that there was not enough friction to get the job done properly. This is where my worry comes in:

Do u think that it could have broken and that I could have not noticed and that she could have noticed but not told me about it? Would I be right in thinking that the break would have been obvious and that she would have told me? Surely she would have responded with something along the lines of –“Ohhh shit the condom broke”.

Also I am worried about the following. 2) Is it of any concern that a small bit of vaginal fluid could have gone from her fanny to her hand to the condom to my cock as a result of the condom change over?

In addition, I also have a vague memory that I looked at the condom when finished and that it was in tact. But I really can’t be sure. I also felt a bit of squelching when shagging. It worries me that that could have been the condom bursting.

After she had put the seconfd condom on she continued to suck me off. I have no fears as far as that is concerned.

After that I continued that to shag. After I blew my load I checked the condom by pulling it back and it was perfectly in tact. So I have no problem with pushing that happenned after the condom change over.

So as u can see it is the change over and the fear of the condom bursting that puts the fear into me. 3) So I was wondering if you think that I should be concerned?


4) Do u think I should just forget about this incident and move on because a breakage would have been obvious to me?


Title: Re: worried
Post by: Queen Tokelove on November 26, 2006, 02:41:26 am
JJ,

It sounds like to me that you both were being very careful when it came to the condom. It also sounds like this person is well informed about STD's which I feel all sex workers should be. Did the conversation include HIV as well? It is good to know that she cares about her well being, you should see what roams around these parts..lol.. The information you supplied tells me that she is very educated on the subject but I could not give you an honest answer on her status of infected or not, I don't think anyone could, but that's just my opinion. I'm sure one of the moderators will give you a more detailed answer.

As far as her wanting to change the condom before getting you off, who knows? Maybe that was just her preference. I think if the condom would've broke you both would have noticed, seeing how you both were checking. I think you got yours and had a decent time..No worries....
Title: Re: worried
Post by: Andy Velez on November 26, 2006, 07:54:32 am
When a condom breaks it is not a subtle event. It's very clear what has happened. The idea of a tiny little and almost unnoticeable break is in the realm of urban myth and it just doesn't happen that way.

So from what you have described of the events I don't see any cause for concern about HIV in relation this incident. Just keep using a latex condom every time for intercourse and you'll be ok as far HIV is concerned.

Cheers,   
Title: Re: worried
Post by: Ann on November 26, 2006, 11:47:24 am
jj,

I've merged your new thread into your original thread - where you should post all your additional thoughts or questions. It helps us to help you when you keep all your additional thoughts or questions in one thread.

If you need help finding your thread when you come here, click on the "Show own posts" link under your name in the left-hand column of any forum page.

Please also read through the Welcome Thread (http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=220.0) so you can familiarize yourself with our Forum Posting Guidelines. Thank you for your cooperation.

Ann
Title: Re: worried
Post by: jj on November 26, 2006, 10:01:23 pm
but surely it could have burst without me knowing.
Title: Re: worried
Post by: Andy Velez on November 26, 2006, 10:36:34 pm
A condom is not a nuclear weapon but it is also not a subtle event when it fails. It's not about teeny tiny holes that people often worry about. When a condom breaks or gives way it's quite clear what has happened.

I don't see any cause for concern about HIV from what you have reported.

However, you seem to be sexually active. We always recommend that anyone who is active should regularly get a full STD panel done regularly. Annually is good and every six months is even better.

Right now I don't see that you have an HIV problem.

Cheers,
Title: Re: worried
Post by: jj on December 07, 2006, 01:20:18 am
Would u agree with the following logic concerning condom breakage and its obviousness?

If condom breakage wasn’t obvious then we would see a pool of people develop that consist only of people who have the disease, but cannot understand why they have it, because they always practiced safe sex.

Since no pool of people is known to exist condom breakage must be obvious.


Thanks a mill and happy Christmas.
Title: Re: worried
Post by: jj on April 15, 2007, 12:45:20 am
Well its been awhile since ive been here. As you can tell from my previous posts i am a bit of a worrier and that i suffer from anxiety disorder.

The other night i went out for a couple of drinks with people from work. After that i felt a bit horny so i decided to go and look for some company. i met up with this pre- operative transsexual. Before i went back to her place i told myself not to have anal sex with this individual because number one she was a sex worker and because number two i dont now alot about her. When i went into her room she had no lube so this provided more reason for me to abstain from having any form of anal sex with her. When we sarted to et downto business she started to feel my genitals. I immediately got the feeling from this that she wanted to proceed without the use of condoms, which was of course a no no for me. So i asked her if she had a condom and she responed with an -"OHHHH WAIT TILL I GO AND GET ONE".  So while she went off to get what we so obviously neede i lay on the bed waiting for her. when she came back i put the condom on and rolled it down the shaft of my penis. I noticed that she hadnt put a condom on and that concerned me because it gave me the impresion tha she want me to suck her off without a rubber. So i said to her - did u only bring one condom. She responded with - "no i brought three". She then put a rubber. I tink she got the message that i wasnt goingto suck her off without a ruber.

After all that she went down on me with the condom on and i went don on her. I checked regularly that my condom was down the full lenght of my penis. I also check a couple of times to make sure that er condom was on properly. Therefore whenever i sucked her of or she sucked me off there was a condom on the penis in question.

In addition to the giving and receivin of protected fellatio i masturbated her and she masturbated me. The condom was on during all the masturbation for both of us.

There was no mouth to mouth kissing. I didnt feel comfortable doing the kissing, so i abstained. However there was a bit of massaging going on here and there.However im not worried about that.
She did very lightly massage for a brief period, my anal area. Do u think tha shoild concern me.

During the session she asked me to give her anal sex but i refused.  This concerned me because if she is willing to receive anal sex from me without lube she is wiling to do the samewith her other punters. And that of course puts her at risk for contracting HIV. Also when you consider the fact that she was willing to suck me off and be sucked without a condom you have to think that she would be willing to do the same with other people. This like the anal-no lube scenario also increases the risk that she could have HIV. Also at the end i took off the condom and came in her mouth because she asked me too. This really concerns me because she has probably done likewise with many other customers. All that has been said in this paragraph sugests to me that she could very well have HIV.

Afer the sexual encounter i said to her that she shouldny be allowing people to cum in her mouth. She said shedoesnt usually allow it. I then asked her i she was clean to which she responded that she was. I asked if she ever got anything and she said no. I asked her if she got tested alot and she said yes. She said she got tested every month. I said to her that i thought that that was alot. She responded by saying that se needed to get tested regularly because she sucked alot of cock. After that i left vey worried that i may have just had a sexual encounter with a HIV carrier.

It wasnt just wat she said and what she wated to do thatworiied me it was also the following ; At the end of the encounter she lay on the bed  and i knelt beside her head as we both masturated oursleves. she played with er willy nd i played with mine. We both had condoms on. she at the very end took her condom off had masturbated till she climaxed. I didnt even notice straight away that she had cum because i was looking straigh at the face and masturbating myself. As soon as i noticed she asked me to cum i her mouth i then took off the coondom and about 30 secs to 1 min later i came in her mouth. My penis did not touch her mouth. she tried to touch it with her mouth after i came but i pulled away because i didnt have a condom on at that time. then it all eded and i stared to ask her about her STD status.

Okay so what worries me? Im worried that blood could have gone from her mouth to the condom. Then from the condom to my hand. Then from my hand to my penis once i had taken the condom off.
I also worry that her semen could have gone from her hand to the condom then to my hand and then to my penis once the condom was taken off. (please note that she did not touch my penis without a condom at any sage except briefly at the very beginning of the session).

please respond





Title: Re: worried
Post by: thunter34 on April 15, 2007, 01:00:18 am
I have a short answer for your really, really long post:  not an HIV concern.  Move on.


EDITED TO SAY:  You're worried about blood from her mouth ....to the condom...to your hand...to kalamazoo and back....

Come on.  You've been around this site enough to know better about real transmission risks.   Read the Lessons section.
Title: Re: worried
Post by: jj on April 15, 2007, 02:00:57 am
but why is hiv trnsfer not possible? i ust need some rationale?
Title: Re: worried
Post by: RapidRod on April 15, 2007, 02:41:26 am
Read the lesson sections. You didn't have a risk.
Title: Re: worried
Post by: Ann on April 15, 2007, 06:30:07 am
jj,

I think you just like to give us a blow-by-blow run down of your sex life. If you want to write porn stories, this isn't the appropriate place, got it?

You didn't do anything risky, but I think you already know that. Keep using those condoms and you'll be fine, no matter if the person you are with has hiv or not.

Ann
Title: Re: worried
Post by: jj on April 16, 2007, 05:32:05 am
if i had had anal would i remember? u cant say im at no risk?
Title: Re: worried
Post by: RapidRod on April 16, 2007, 05:39:38 am
if i had had anal would i remember? u cant say im at no risk?

The thing is you didn't have anal sex with "HER," you didn't have a risk, so it's time for you to move on from this forum. Read the lessons before you move on. No need to post any further questions.
Title: Re: worried
Post by: jj on May 24, 2007, 07:54:19 pm
just got tested. Scared to death. Think im ok?
Title: Re: worried
Post by: Matty the Damned on May 24, 2007, 08:08:38 pm
Think im ok?

Well I don't know about OK, but I certainly think you'll test negative for HIV. You didn't have a risk to begin with.

MtD