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Author Topic: Dating Part XII: Labors of Love, Love's Lost, and Loving Life.....  (Read 70278 times)

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Offline confusedme

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  • Posts: 74
  • wishing away reality
Re: Dating Part XII: Labors of Love, Love's Lost, and Loving Life.....
« Reply #100 on: December 09, 2007, 12:00:06 am »
Queen I am sorry you feel like you are talking to yourself. I am reading I've just hit a funk. The husband pisses me off. He's trying to be sweet now cuz he knows I am pissed off and that just makes me madder. Add his BS with the money problems and the car breaking down last night (it's fixed now) I've just been kinda blah. I musta been a rough bitch in a past life b/c I haven't been bad enough for my karma to be this bad. I'll try to check in more. Maybe it will keep my funky mood down to a min.
08/13/07 - Diagnosis confirmed
08/30/07 - T-cells 400, VL 6,500 (Baseline)
11/30/07 - T-cells 428, VL 9,950

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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  • Cheech 2.2.94 - 4.23.10 We miss you so much!
Re: Dating Part XII: Labors of Love, Love's Lost, and Loving Life.....
« Reply #101 on: December 09, 2007, 12:43:38 am »
Hey now, give a girl a break with her first week back to work AND running with the masses at the malls and shopping centers today, lol!  I have checked in a little but I am exhausted!  Didn't get crap done tonight, could only wrap a few gifts cause I need tissue paper, so its back out again tomorrow.

BT~ I can't remember if you're on meds are not, I'm thinking you are.  Get yourself taken care of OK?  Now I want marshmallows covered in chocolate, I need a fondue pot.....lol!  :D

Queen~  Drink a Corona for me, with LOTS of lime, I LOVE lime, mix it with heavy metal and I do crazy shit, ask Iceman, lol.

~ Cindy
« Last Edit: December 09, 2007, 12:46:27 am by MOONLIGHT1114 »
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Part XII: Labors of Love, Love's Lost, and Loving Life.....
« Reply #102 on: December 09, 2007, 08:21:04 am »
OK, Cin, you get one break.  Yes, I'm on meds.  Sustiva and Trizivir.  The doc that put me on that combo was an intern and he's been gone for about six or eight months.  The doc I have now is not an intern and is very well versed in HIV.  So he'll probably put me on something else.  Oh, btw, that chocolate covered marshmallow thing was sooooooo yummy!  The chocolate there at South Bend Chocolate Cafe is so good.  They did have a selection of sugar-free chocolates, but why should I behave? :D  Christmas is here and this is major sweets time for me.  Anyway, you got a break, now you better check in more regularly! ;)  Good luck out shopping today.  I'm so glad I got my shopping done.

Confused, sorry that you're going through all that mess with your hubby.  It helps me to check in here every day.  I'm not saying you have to religiously check in every day, just saying it might help you to talk things out here and get different people's views on things. 

Well, it's time for someone else to start a new thread.  Who will it be?  Today I'm going to do some grocery shopping and I'm interviewing my oldest sister for my child & adolescent psychology class.  She lives a couple towns north of me and it was freezing rain during the night.  It should be interesting making the trek to her house.  If it's too bad, I'm just going to do it over the phone.  No sense tempting fate.  My bro is coming over tonight for movie time/pig-out.  He's diabetic also, but like I said above, 'tis the season!  I hope you ladies have a nice day.  *thinking about NY and her new baby*
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Offline Dragonette

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Re: Dating Part XII: Labors of Love, Love's Lost, and Loving Life.....
« Reply #103 on: December 09, 2007, 12:31:36 pm »
hi ladies

hand still hurts so gonna be careful. sunday night here, i had a painful conversation with the bf, we are still very good, but i dont think he want to start working on the baby thing soon and i am not sure either. it seems that he is not sure that he is sure that he wants to be with me *forever*. having a baby would just cement the whole thing, there are other issues too, not knowing where to live, him being unemployed, him not knowing where we would live, me vetoing living in his hometown, there are just so many obstacles. i try not to think of it as being rejected cos i know he loves me very much, but it hurts, anyway on thus he will be going to spain and i will join him less than a week later and will stay there for 2 weeks, i am not feeling up for that to say the least. i have entertained the idea of postponing my ticket to another day for a while.

strangely i am upset about this but i can say i am still ok. tue i have the scan for my feet, which will find out if i have pn or not, and hopefully for my arm as well which will find out if its carpal tunnel syndrom, but i reckon its standard rsi.

Betty pls be careful with the sugar, you know food is addictive... i know cos i am addicted to it also. as well as the internet, one reason why i got my arm in such a state. both are things we need to use moderatly, in my case i go online for work every day as well, and so its a more complex addiction than the usual ones. i hope you get your numbers sorted asap. Queen hope you heal your heart asap. i will try to check in writing again in a few days. love you all,

"If you keep one foot in yesterday, and one in tomorrow, you piss all over today". Betty Tacy

Offline Queen Tokelove

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  • Smokey the Smurf
Re: Dating Part XII: Labors of Love, Love's Lost, and Loving Life.....
« Reply #104 on: December 09, 2007, 02:01:33 pm »
Hey Ladies----

Since this thread is moving at a snail's pace or so it seems, I will let this thread ride out til tomorrow. If no one starts a new one then I will again. I know you ladies are busy doing your thing and I seem to be the one who is here on a regular. Well, Betty and Dragonette too.

Betty, I am glad you enjoyed yourself last night. It sounds like you had a really good time. Confused, I understand being in a funk but don't keep it bottled in is all I'm saying. You know we are here for you and it sounds like you need to vent. Let it out!!!! Cindy, Yes, you're a working girl and has a man now so there is not much time left for little else. We understand, give us a holler on your day off or something. Dragonette, You are going through so much right now. I will be praying for you. Not sure what else to say.

Rico did end up showing up last night. I guess he could see my attitude cause he went to explaining himself but oddly enough, I really didn't care about what he said. It went in one ear and out the other. He noticed the difference in me because now he is singing the tune of he knows he has to prove himself. I'm just like whatever, I'm not holding my breath to see if he does or not. I hate being this way towards him but he caused it so now he has to deal with it. I feel beat. I think I will just be lazy all day today and sleep off and on. It's Sunday, not much else to do really. Have a good one, ladies.....

Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

Offline cjc

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  • Sweet Girl
Re: Dating Part XII: Labors of Love, Love's Lost, and Loving Life.....
« Reply #105 on: December 09, 2007, 08:20:47 pm »
Hello Ladies. Hope everyone is well. Queen and Betty, you are definitely not talking to yourselves , I check in often but do not always have time to post.                                                    Betty, yes, IF my brother came back , I would have to go. He raises my stress level so much that I want to get high. And that's no longer a option for me.     Sorry about your cold sore and rash. Hope your doc can give you something to help.            Queen, That sucks that Rico is being a pain but glad you  let it slid off. I will check your blog for a new post. i like your blog.                            ML, hope you are well.                  Has anyone heard from NY or did I just miss it.                                      Dragonette, Sorry you hands and feet are giving you trouble.   Try to have a great time in Spain.                                                 Anyway, Take care. Later, Cristy

Offline Queen Tokelove

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  • Smokey the Smurf
Re: Dating Part XII: Labors of Love, Love's Lost, and Loving Life.....
« Reply #106 on: December 09, 2007, 08:35:41 pm »
Would you believe I still did not get any damn sleep!!!! I guess that just means when I do go to sleep, I will sleep like a baby. Before I forget, My Cowboys are 12-1 and we won our division. It was a tight one, winning by one point but a win is win, baby!!!! I'm just chilling and watching Kill Bill Volume 1. Nothing much else to do..... :-\
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

Offline confusedme

  • Member
  • Posts: 74
  • wishing away reality
Re: Dating Part XII: Labors of Love, Love's Lost, and Loving Life.....
« Reply #107 on: December 09, 2007, 09:20:46 pm »
I know I should check in and vent here. I know you ladies would so have my back. I just know how I am when I am angry or upset. I say things that I might mean but don't always impliment. When I don't do what I said I feel like I am backtracking whatever. I don't like that. I will sit back and think I want him to leave but I never do anything to let him know I want him to leave. If he ever thinks I am pissed he kisses ass and finally does the right thing to make me get over it.

I am pissed off at him now because he is still not working and he is spending too much money. Everything has been a contant struggle since he came home. I knew it would be hard but I had no idea it would be this hard. I'm frustrated and getting fed up. I know I am not totally fed up yet because I haven't put him out. Sometimes I hate that I don't have a short fuse. Mine is way too long. I know that I should have already told him to go and started on straightening out my life again. I'm just not at that point yet and I don't even really know why.
08/13/07 - Diagnosis confirmed
08/30/07 - T-cells 400, VL 6,500 (Baseline)
11/30/07 - T-cells 428, VL 9,950

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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  • Posts: 1,918
  • Cheech 2.2.94 - 4.23.10 We miss you so much!
Re: Dating Part XII: Labors of Love, Love's Lost, and Loving Life.....
« Reply #108 on: December 09, 2007, 10:27:39 pm »
Hi GFs~

Oh I should be in bed, I am ready to fall over.  I decorated the tree tonight and got the rest of the decorations for table tops, etc out, including my Nativity scene.  I actually knelt with Cheech next to the tree and prayed tonight.  I prayed for all of the special people in my life, including all of us and those who have HIV.  Whenever I pray, I cry, which is why I can't bring myself to go to church, I feel I get too emotional.  I hope to overcome that someday.

Iceman was a little hurt by how my Mom doesn't seem to have anything nice to say about him, he was reading my earlier post in here.  I told him not to worry, that Mom is too critical most of the time, and then she goes and can be your best friend.  For example, she called today to pass along a nice compliment that my Dad made about me.  After spending all of yesterday running around with my parents, my Dad told my Mom that I was actually pleasant to be around.   :D  He told Mom he wasn't sure that if it was the result of Iceman or my new job, but he saw that I was in a good mood.  Well, Yay for me, I say!  I am usually in a funk because of something, but I think I am doing OK now.

Iceman is at the Ravens game, texting me and saying how the game stinks!  Poor guy, the Colts are clobbering his team!

Confused~  I'm sorry to hear about the stress at home with your man.  Don't hate that you don't have a short fuse, that way you won't make any rash decisions that you may regret later!
Cristy~I hope your brother stays away, as rude as that sounds.  It would suck if he wrecked your home life with your parents and son.  Hang in there!
Queen~What are you going to do about Rico?  Since he came over and you talked are you hoping that things will die down and be easier for the both of you?  I'm thinking that because you haven't shut him out completely that you're willing to give this another chance.  At least he knows who's boss, and that you don't take any shit.  How are your ears doing?  And the cough?  I can start the next thread tomorrow night if you want me to.  I want to think of a catchy title with "December" or "Holidays" in it.  Oooh, I just had a lightbulb moment!  Hee-hee!
Drag~Well it sounds like that pretty head is still of "sound mind" on your shoulders.  You and your man have so many things going on, just give everything a little time.  The living location and his changing jobs are crucial to your future.  I have been meaning to ask what "RSI" stands for with regards to the pain you've been having.  Do you have or have you had blood clots in your legs before?  Some people in my support group are dealing with PN and the nurse said to check for circulation problems and clots.  It seems very common, I hope everything will work out OK for you.
BT~I hope you get to switch your meds.  I am on Sustiva and Truvada.  Have you ever been on Truvada before?  Its been an easy regimen for me.  I have been pigging out and buying more crap for myself than for Iceman while shopping.  Well, not really, but I got new jeans and new shoes for work! 

OMG I haven't told you all about work!  You can start as early as 6am or as late as 730am, and then leave 8-1/2 hours later.  You get 2 scheduled breaks, 15 minutes each, and you take a half hour lunch whenever you want to.  You can switch up your schedule every day, arrive late, arrive early, it doesn't matter.  I have been in a training room with three other women, but tomorrow is the big "first day" out in cubicle world!  You can listen to your iPod, MP3 or CDs with your headphones on, everyone does.  The work is easy, no challenge, so its a good segway for me getting back into the working world.  The casual dress (jeans!), the 3 mile commute and the headphones to block out the chatter boxes are all adding up to a good job.  The pay is less than what I've made in about 5 years, but its a start.  At least I have my MADAP to cover my COBRA benefits until next fall!

OK, going to start the new thread while I have my "inspiration!"  I hope you all like it!

Cam, tendai, Win, NY and all the rest of us fine GFs, stay safe and warm tonight!

~ Cindy


« Last Edit: December 10, 2007, 11:09:49 pm by MOONLIGHT1114 »
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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  • Posts: 1,918
  • Cheech 2.2.94 - 4.23.10 We miss you so much!
Re: Dating Part XII: Labors of Love, Love's Lost, and Loving Life.....
« Reply #109 on: December 09, 2007, 10:34:02 pm »
Its time to go check out Dating Thread Part XIII!!   ;D
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

 


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