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Author Topic: Having a hard time dealing with slowly wasting away  (Read 16387 times)

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Offline whiteboy500

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Having a hard time dealing with slowly wasting away
« on: June 18, 2009, 03:05:01 pm »
I live in Dallas, and i started working out 2 yrs ago.   I am not happy with the results because i don't get bigger, I get veinier.   In my legs, on my arms, I can see the bones in my chest area.   Then i went to the food pantry for PWA and i got to noticing all the guys coming in, it's summer, and all i see is skinny legs with veins popping out.  It doesn't look right!   And i think, that's me right now!   And all the fat loss from my Hiv drug therapy is NEVER going to come back!   So I didn't consult w/ a doctor, my t-cells are below 200 and viral load undetectable, been taking Hiv meds since '94.   I don't want to get as skinny as some of the guys i've seen lately.    So i quit my meds!  I'm not going to be the face of aids!  I hate what it makes me look like.   I look like a skinny freak!  So i'm not asking a question, i'm just wondering how others deal with this?   A few days ago, i decided myself, that i don't want to waste anymore.   This slow wasting is killing me, I can't stand to look at myself in the mirror anymore.  I'm SICK of it.   Any advice would be greatly appreciated!   Depression has sunk in again too, no amount of therapy is going to make me happy!   
      Thanks,,......Greg!

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: Having a hard time dealing with slowly wasting away
« Reply #1 on: June 18, 2009, 04:43:36 pm »
I don't think it's wasting, it's lipoatrophy -- they're two different things.  And you probably got it from medications you took in the 90's, not anything you are on now, unless you are stating that this is something you're only seeing in the last couple of years and that up until then you looked perfectly fine.

At any rate quitting HIV medications is not going to correct something that happened to your body already, as lipoatrophy is at a cellular level and doesn't really reverse itself.  In fact, you'll probably eventually get sick and in the hospital with PCP and end up losing 30 lbs, and in that case you will have wasting, on top of lipoatrophy.  Not to mention you'll possibly die.

Of course, it's ultimately your decisions and yours alone whether or not to take your HIV meds, but you should have the correct information to base this decision on, not faulty information.  I hope you revisit this thread to discuss the issue more in depth.  I'd be interested to know what meds you were on in the 90's, what you are on now, what your "baseline normative" weight is versus what it is now, and what the timeline was exactly as regards to the body shape changes you are referencing.

edit: I'm reading your old posts and it seems, indeed, you've discussed this issue previously so it shouldn't be all that new to you.  Are you still on videx (didanosine, or ddI) as mentioned last October?  That's one that they don't use so much anymore, as most people that used it in the 90's got lipoatrophy, so there you go.  I'm not sure why you're on that when you're on the other meds you listed, as your doctor has you thus on 3 NRTI class meds instead of the normative 2.  I'll assume that it's an issue of your resistance profile, but obviously I don't have those test results to look at nor am I medical doctor.  Still seems a bit odd to me, and I'd think that your doctor would have considered something else but perhaps not.  Have you discussed lipoatrophy and videx/didanosine with your doctor and if not, why not?

I, too, have lipoatrophy and the issue with veiny legs and lack of fat on the bottom of my foot, and this is an issue I've dealt with now for over a decade.  I'm sure we've been on much of the same medications in the past 15 years.  I use foot pad inserts when things are bothering me, I pumice my soles regularly to prevent the build up of painful calluses, and I generally refrain from wearing shorts which, of course, sucks royally when it's hot.  Otherwise I put on shorts and just don't care if people see my veiny legs.  I'm 44 and while not an ancient fossil yet, I'm not trying to pick up 20 year old twinks on the street.  It can at times be depressing so I pro-actively have seen a therapist once monthly for the past eight years, and I also attend a monthly local support group for long term survivors dealing with similar issues.
"I’ve slept with enough men to know that I’m not gay"

Offline whiteboy500

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Re: Having a hard time dealing with slowly wasting away
« Reply #2 on: June 18, 2009, 05:29:53 pm »
Yes, i have discussed lipoatrophy w/ her.   I've had painful Sculptura shots to fill my face back up .   And i am still on DDI.   Which i will now quit!    So where is all the extra fat coming from that distributes itself around my waste like an extra tire?  I don't eat anything sweet, i barely eat to maintain my weight! 
       I have not gone into great detail w/ my doctor, but she knows that i'm not happy w/ all my fat loss. But what can anybody do right?   I'm just very down, sry if i sound snappy!   I hope u revisit!  If so, let's talk?   

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: Having a hard time dealing with slowly wasting away
« Reply #3 on: June 18, 2009, 06:28:00 pm »
Yes, i have discussed lipoatrophy w/ her.   I've had painful Sculptura shots to fill my face back up .   And i am still on DDI.   Which i will now quit!    So where is all the extra fat coming from that distributes itself around my waste like an extra tire?  I don't eat anything sweet, i barely eat to maintain my weight! 
       I have not gone into great detail w/ my doctor, but she knows that i'm not happy w/ all my fat loss. But what can anybody do right?   I'm just very down, sry if i sound snappy!   I hope u revisit!  If so, let's talk?   

Hey sweetheart -- of course my heart goes out to a fellow lipo traveler, like I said I just want you to understand what's going on and have facts.  The gains in your tummy, which seem illogical when it's counteracted by losses in your face and limbs, is actually what's called "visceral fat" meaning it's not on the surface (as in "grab an inch") but buried underneath your abdomen, in between internal organs.  As far as I know that's more closely associated with the protease inhibitor class, though as you are on Prezista I would speculate that you obtained this visceral fat from previous older line protease inhibitors like Kaletra (were you on that one previously?).  I too have this visceral fat issue, but mine is somewhat minimal compared to what I've seen in most other LTS HIV patients.  You might get some from the Norvir booster you use with Prezista (I'm on that med too) but boosters are very minimal, so it's not convincing that not using this will do much.  There is a new medication called GS-9350 in clinical trials that hopefully we can use in place of the Norvir booster, and indeed I'm hopefully going to do this as soon as I qualify for the drug trial.  You probably have an elevated lipid panel as well.

Like you, I do not consume a lot of sugar/sweets nor do I particularly overeat.  In fact, I generally only eat two meals each day and the morning meal is never very large.

I still recommend further conversations with your doctor, and specifically ask why you are on Videx as opposed to something in place of that when it's known to greatly increase these issues.  Mind you, I will re-state that these are cellular changes and that halting such a med will not reverse what you are seeing, but hopefully it will prevent it from increasing over the years.  I hope that point is clear.
"I’ve slept with enough men to know that I’m not gay"

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Having a hard time dealing with slowly wasting away
« Reply #4 on: June 18, 2009, 07:01:57 pm »
I have been poz since 1993, and from 1996 to 2002 I was on protease inhibitors.  I took Fortovase, 6 pills, 3x a day.  I used to be shaped like a pear, haad a very full face and was heavy through the hips and thighs.
                                                                                               
Now my shape has changed.  I call myself a "beachball with sticks."    My arms and legs are finally slender, but yes, veiny.  Everyone asks me if I work out because the veins pop out so much in my arms.

I have a bigger chest now and a "budda belly."  I was really concerned about it at first but now I see this is just how it is for me.  I can't tell my body where to place the fat.

I'm learning to accept me for me and I'm just thankful I am here today.

Chin up, I understand your frustration.  I went through it, too.

~Cindy
« Last Edit: June 18, 2009, 07:03:36 pm by MOONLIGHT1114 »
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Offline Solo_LTSurvivor

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Re: Having a hard time dealing with slowly wasting away
« Reply #5 on: June 19, 2009, 12:23:04 am »


Hey sweetheart -- of course my heart goes out to a fellow lipo traveler, like I said I just want you to understand what's going on and have facts.  The gains in your tummy, which seem illogical when it's counteracted by losses in your face and limbs, is actually what's called "visceral fat" meaning it's not on the surface (as in "grab an inch") but buried underneath your abdomen, in between internal organs. 

And while this is not a laughing matter, I thought I'd toss just a touch of humor into the mix.  Welcome to the world of being "skinny fat."  Believe me, it's not fun -- especially when from all outward appearance you look thin as a rail, and then you take your shirt off and it looks like your 18-hour girdle died after 10 minutes :)

All of my life, I have been rail thin with an extremely fast metabolism.  I have been the brunt of numerous crack addict/manorexic jokes and people telling me that I need to eat more.  Then it seemed like as I started getting older -- meaning over 42 (I'll be 46 on Saturday), I started to notice a belly.  I just couldn't believe that my midsection was bigger than my pecs and I would have to start actually thinking about particular shirts to wear to camouflage this gut I was developing.

I also went through a period where my diet wasn't the best because of difficulty eating -- so my doctor thought it would be a good idea for me to drink supplements, as well as take Megace, which puts on water weight so I could sorta attempt to bulk up and not look so disproportionate.  This is not a permanent solution when one is not able to support lots of weight on their thin frame, as it is.

I lost a lot of weight in my face during that period where I wasn't able to eat -- so I really began to feel self-conscious about myself as I felt I had the "look" and everyone "knew" that I was infected.

Then one day I just woke up and told myself, these are things I cannot really change.  Sure I can utilize my gym membership in order to tone up, but the bottom line is that I will always be a skinny guy.  It's in my genes.  I can only live my life for myself because I am responsible for my own happiness and do what I feel is right for me.

As you are aware that the particular meds you take are affecting your body in this manner, I think it is absolutely necessary to speak with your doctor and look into switching regimens.  Maybe also speak to a fitness expert as well and develop some type of routine that may help you transform the areas about yourself you are displeased with.

Yes, it is frustrating -- but as many have said -- we're still here and ultimately have to deal with the good along with the bad.
don't equate intelligence with lack of masculinity
Jim Phelps, Mission Impossible
____________________________

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Offline Gary85741

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Re: Having a hard time dealing with slowly wasting away
« Reply #6 on: June 19, 2009, 09:35:59 am »

I surely share the frustrations of which you guys have spoken.  What has helped me some is Nandrolone (injectible steroid.)  To best metabolize it (get the best use) I lift weights every other day.  The manufacturer (Watson) quit making a year or so ago, but there are compounding pharmacies who do.

Now I kind of look like I have two different body parts put together.  Above my waist I look fairly good I think, but below the waist and I have leg and butt wasting.  As MP discussed, I would never consider wearing shorts, and I live in Arizona of all places...not exactly the a cold climate.  I am self-conscious about what I wear and buy to wear. 

I've always been slender anyway...we inherit basic body types.  I get quarterly Radiesse injections (three syringes per visit) to keep my face looking pretty normal.  My veins are prominent and now I'm being more cognizant of what I eat so I don't get a protruding stomach...which is more conspicuous of course on a slender person.

Pretty much now I just accept my situation.  Some people may reject you physically (have you had that occur?)  Others it doesn't bother.  No one, after all, is found attractive by everyone.

Gary   



Poz since '89. 
Current regimen: Rescriptor, Emtriva, Kaletra, Invirase, Acyclovir, Lisinopril, Lipitor, Prilosec, Valium, Testim, Nandrolone, Loperamidr, Marinol.

Offline aztecan

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Re: Having a hard time dealing with slowly wasting away
« Reply #7 on: June 19, 2009, 09:58:27 pm »
I think many of us our in the same boat as you, Whiteboy.

Thanks to Crixivan, AZT, and, probably to some degree, the virus itself, I have the crix belly, buffalo hump and horsecollar neck so often referred to by those of us who took the older meds.

For a time it really bothered me, especially when at the gym and I was poked and questioned by people who didn't need to know.

But, now, I don't really care any more.  I am what I am, - a 50-something, bald headed, just shy of 6-foot-tall man who has a belly, a hump a bizarre neck and, I hope, a sense of humor about the whole thing.

I can now do a really good impression of Jabba the Hut!  ;)

I am not making light of your plight, Whiteboy. But sometimes, we just have to grin and bear it. We don't have too many choices.

The only thing I would add to what has already been posted is is that I would keep working out were I you. I found, that, even though skinny, my arms and legs were muscular enough that I didn't look like I was wasting away. I just looked like a skinny guy with a bit of muscle thrown in for good measure.

Maybe that was all in my head, but I felt better for it, so what the hell.

Stay with us and let us know how you're doing.

HUGS,

Mark
"May your life preach more loudly than your lips."
~ William Ellery Channing (Unitarian Minister)

Offline Theyer

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Re: Having a hard time dealing with slowly wasting away
« Reply #8 on: October 16, 2009, 08:49:49 am »
hi
DDI did it for me, the loss of fat has had painful consequenses as my feet are bone and skin.That and the PN means daily pain meds and fentalyn patches.I have been offered face injections ,which in the uk are free,but I have so far turned them down. Work on your self image as much as you work on your body and maybe a happier balence could be there for you.
Take care
theyer
"If we can find the money to kill people, we can find the money to help people ."  Tony Benn

Offline mewithu

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Re: Having a hard time dealing with slowly wasting away
« Reply #9 on: October 16, 2009, 09:35:11 am »
  I don't like to argue this point but I will one more time for good measure lipoatrophy is wasting . all you have to do is look it up or better yet if your ID DR is worth his merit he should know this already.
 I know you all think i don't know what i am talking of but I have been fight this thing for many years and call it what you may it is still a terrible thing to have to go through as if we dont have enough to worry with as it is. The main culprits in the medicine world were Zerit AZT and a few other oldies i dont wish to go in to all of them. The Virus itself has a tremendous deal to do with wasting also. Once it starts attacking the myoapthy I know  I spelled or said that wrong there is little we can do to stop the damage. It is hard to deal with mentally as i have it and i have days that i look better than others but mainly I was always skinny anyway until one point in my life i got up to 130 which for a person who is only 5 foot 6 inches and full of muscle wasn't a bad looking dude. I am stuck at 115 lbs right now and i try walking every day and other things and nothing seems to want to turn this thing around and make me look normal like I use to be. Yes it makes me depressed and all that, but what can I do. If I drink the ensures i get a belly and that makes me look freaky,  hey isn't that part of a song. Any All we can do is try our best to combat this desease the best way we and the Drs know how. Lots of luck And i know that isn't much help but that is all I can think of to say right now. I came from nothing if you read my profile to at least where I am now. That is something anyway to look up to for myself worth.
1997 is when I found out, being deathly ill. I had to go to the hospital due to extreme headache and fever. I fell coma like,  two months later weighing 95 pounds and in extreme pain and awoke to knowledge of Pancreatis, Cryptococcal Meningitis, Thrush,Severe Diarea,  Wasting, PCP pneumonia. No eating, only through tpn. Very sick, I was lucky I had good insurance with the company I worked for. I was in the hospital for three months that time. 
(2010 Now doing OK cd4=210  VL= < 75)
I have become resistant to many nukes and non nukes, Now on Reyataz, , Combivir. Working well for me not too many side effects.  I have the wasting syndrome, Fatigue  . Hard to deal with but believe it or not I have been through worse. Three Pulmonary Embolism's in my life. 2012 520 t's <20 V load

Offline dixieman

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Re: Having a hard time dealing with slowly wasting away
« Reply #10 on: October 16, 2009, 10:45:06 am »
Whiteboy (Greg) how old are you? you stated youve been on the meds since 1994... are you 40  or plus over 40... Well look at what your folks looked like when they got older... my dad was a hockey player built like a brick house and when he reached 40 he went to pee as he told me one he could not see his dick...lol turned around and his butt disapeared... he said it would probally happen to me.. Well under different circumstances in a way it has... I have a small belly... and my duck butt is no longer there... I kinda look like an human anatomy model... veins and muscles with limited fat only in the mid-section... but, my stomach looks like washboard abs? figure the fat is visceral fat but, for almost 50 I look Damn good... I exercise... eat well... my cd4's are almost 1600... I more skin issues than I ever had but, oh well... I still have my hair... I paid to have filler injections to fatten up my cheeks... I bought an AB Circle to see if it will help with the mid-drift and I lift weights to keep big arms... chest and I was born with muscular legs and I walk up 20 flights of stairs several times a day to keep a butt... not a big as it once was ... well no fat at all but, hey its there... I can build muscle thats about it...
no my body is not what it would look like without the meds but, hey I'm alive and I feel good... It was great to go to my class reunion (30) year class from high school... Wow did all the boys get ugly or what? there were a couple who looked good but, everyone changed... and most would not make it on the cover of play-girl... but, hey lifes GREAT! I think you may need to get some professional counciling... I hope you find out how lucky you are to be alive...even if its not perfect... I know many who would love tobe here today but, are not...

Offline sharkdiver

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Re: Having a hard time dealing with slowly wasting away
« Reply #11 on: October 16, 2009, 10:49:17 am »
this guy hasn't signed on since June, I doubt he is paying attention to this.

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: Having a hard time dealing with slowly wasting away
« Reply #12 on: October 16, 2009, 11:30:50 am »
  I don't like to argue this point but I will one more time for good measure lipoatrophy is wasting .

Wrong.
"I’ve slept with enough men to know that I’m not gay"

Offline netta

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Re: Having a hard time dealing with slowly wasting away
« Reply #13 on: October 16, 2009, 04:06:43 pm »
Wow I just started a topic on a similar situation!
"to thine own self be true"

Offline veritas

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Re: Having a hard time dealing with slowly wasting away
« Reply #14 on: October 18, 2009, 05:48:00 am »


mewithu,

Your absolutely correct. Lipoatrophy is wasting  As a matter of fact, all lipoatrophy is wasting, however, not all wasting is lipoatrophy. I can see you have done some homework on this subject ---- good for you!

Definitely one of the most difficult adverse side effects to deal with. Good nutrition, exercise (weight training is best), and fillers (if affordable) are the best ways to treat this condition today. The toll both physically and mentally can be difficult. If you want more information, pick up a copy of "Built to Survive"by Michael Mooney and Nelson Vergel. It's an Hiv Wellness Guide.

Greg,
I know it's difficult but it's a matter of getting in the right frame of mind. Please don't stop taking your medication. You can overcome this. Read the book I suggested, it will give you a starting point for a plan to cope. Remember, a lot of others have dealt with this problem and so can you. If I'm not mistaken,one of the authors of that book lives in Texas. There might be a group you could go to if there is one close to you.

v
« Last Edit: October 18, 2009, 05:52:13 am by veritas »

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: Having a hard time dealing with slowly wasting away
« Reply #15 on: October 18, 2009, 09:53:26 am »
Wasting and Lipodystrophy both result in changes in body shape.  They are two specific and separate syndromes.
"I’ve slept with enough men to know that I’m not gay"

Offline Ann

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Re: Having a hard time dealing with slowly wasting away
« Reply #16 on: October 18, 2009, 10:23:12 am »
From the Lessons:

...the term "lipodystrophy" can be broken down to reveal exactly what it means. "Lipo" refers to fat and "dystrophy" refers to abnormal growth or change. Put it all together in plain English, and what you're left with is exactly what's being seen in a number of people living with HIV: abnormal fat changes. The medical literature also refers to lipodystrophy as the "fat redistribution syndrome."

//

Some people see the amount of visceral fat—fat deep within the body—around their gut increase significantly. The medical term for this is lipohypertrophy (excessive fat growth).

//

Some people see the fat in their legs, arms, buttocks, or face diminish. This can cause veins to protrude in the arms and legs and sunken cheeks in the face. The medical term for this is lipoatrophy (decrease in fat tissue). source

//

Weight loss and wasting syndrome are two AIDS-related complications that, if not adequately treated, can be life threatening. Even though anti-HIV therapies have helped reduce the risk of weight loss and wasting syndrome, both problems still occur. According to a study reported in late 1997, as many as 25% of HIV-positive people receiving triple-drug anti-HIV therapy still experience some degree of weight loss and/or wasting. source


V, Miss P is correct. Wasting and lipo issues are completely different, although in the case of lipoatrophy, the resulting appearance can sometimes be the same, especially when concerning the face. In fact, sometimes facial lipoatrophy is referred to as "facial wasting", but that is just "common usage" and has no relation to aids related wasting syndrome.

Ann
« Last Edit: October 18, 2009, 10:26:26 am by Ann »
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Offline veritas

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Re: Having a hard time dealing with slowly wasting away
« Reply #17 on: October 18, 2009, 10:57:42 am »

Ann,

He did not specify syndrome, he just said wasting. Lipoatropy is facial wasting among other things. Thus my statement : All lipoatrophy is wasting, but all wasting is not lipoatrophy. Did you not read my post? Here is another link:

http://napwa.org.au/?q=node/558

"What is lipoatrophy?
Lipoatrophy is the technical term for the loss or ‘wasting’ of fat from the face and other areas of the body such as the buttocks, upper arms, legs and thighs. Moderate to severe lipoatrophy of the face has a noticeable ‘sunken cheeks’ look and may also include loss of fat around the nose, mouth, temples and eye sockets"
Or perhaps Miss P wasn't clear enough in his posts. He did not say wasting syndrome and mewithu did  not say wasting syndrome. He said lipoatrophy is wasting and he is correct. In your haste to prove me wrong,you seem to overlook the pertinent points.

v

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: Having a hard time dealing with slowly wasting away
« Reply #18 on: October 18, 2009, 11:07:05 am »
Veritas, you were responding to mewithu.  If you read his sig line he specifically mentions the word "syndrome".  In your haste to prove Ann and I wrong, you seem to overlook the pertinent context of his commentary.

The bottom line is that it's possible to have HIV wasting and not have lipo.  It's possible to have lipo but not have HIV wasting.  It's possible to have both HIV wasting and lipo at the same time.  HIV wasting can, in many cases, be solved and reversed.  Lipo can't really be reversed as it's a metabolic dysfunction.

All of us do a disservice on this board by conflating the two syndromes.
"I’ve slept with enough men to know that I’m not gay"

Offline veritas

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Re: Having a hard time dealing with slowly wasting away
« Reply #19 on: October 18, 2009, 11:47:23 am »

Miss P,

And why could he not have both? As a matter of fact, if you read his signature line, he seems to have had both, having weighed 95 pounds and then coming back to 115. Then look at all the medications he has had to endure,lipoatrophy is almost a given.  Did you not take that into consideration? I was responding to what he said in his post not his signature line.
Again pertinent points missed !

v

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: Having a hard time dealing with slowly wasting away
« Reply #20 on: October 18, 2009, 11:54:21 am »
I've never stated that you can't have both, in fact my last post said it's entirely possible.  But they're not the same thing.  In fact, I've personally had both syndromes.  Have you?  However, neither my doctor nor I conflated the two issues.  My wasting issue was reversed, but I still have lipo and have so for a decade.  That doesn't mean HIV wasting and lipo are the same thing.  They aren't.

Again, pertinent points missed.
"I’ve slept with enough men to know that I’m not gay"

Offline veritas

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Re: Having a hard time dealing with slowly wasting away
« Reply #21 on: October 18, 2009, 12:36:33 pm »

There you go again Miss P !

Your attempting to confuse the issue. No one said they were the same thing. However,  wasting is a lipoatrophy problem and that is what mewithu was referring to. He should know, he had both. Oh, by the way, so have I.

It's pretty amusing that both you and I seem to have followed the same path in the course of our disease. Not only have we had most of the complications from the early 90's, we are also on the same regimen today.  Our cd4s are about the same (1280),ud and cd4%40. Your name is "David", my name is "Dave". So let's stop the nonsense. We both know what we are doing here and it's gone far enough. Another thing we have in common, we're not afraid to speak our minds (I have to admit I kinda like the jousting). I like jousting with Ann too. I can tell she's seething sometimes when answering my posts.
 
By the way, do you have any meds left to take that you haven't tried? I've got two left. But I like the regimen I'm on now.

So let's not piss each other off again.( But that doesn't mean we won't joust!).


v

Offline nicknatpatywack

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Re: Having a hard time dealing with slowly wasting away
« Reply #22 on: October 19, 2009, 01:54:47 am »
What about the meds today? do they cause Lipdystrophy or however you spell it?

Offline veritas

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Re: Having a hard time dealing with slowly wasting away
« Reply #23 on: October 19, 2009, 06:11:29 am »

nick,

The latest meds seem to be more forgiving and and don't have that problem, however, they are new and time will tell what other AEs will crop up. The meds that seem to cause this problem are the nrti's with Zerit being the worst offender ( there are others also). Check out your meds and their potential side effects here:

http://www.aidsmeds.com/list.shtml

Remember, all medications are personal and it will depend on how your body reacts to them. With the meds out today, your Doctor should be able to have you  avoid lipoatrophy .
Good luck!

v

Offline Dachshund

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Re: Having a hard time dealing with slowly wasting away
« Reply #24 on: October 19, 2009, 08:05:11 am »
What about the meds today? do they cause Lipdystrophy or however you spell it?

Nick this forum is for Long Term Survivors and we respectfully ask that you not post here. If you have a question start a thread in that particular forum and not in LTS.

Thanks

Offline joejoe1972

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Re: Having a hard time dealing with slowly wasting away
« Reply #25 on: December 15, 2009, 03:49:33 pm »
I was diagnosed in 1991 and have always been a thin guy.Recently i have lost 20 pounds in about a month and I have chosen to not worry about it.All you can do is own it, its your body.Who cares what anybody else thinks you have to learn to live with yourself.Its the only way to survive the mind numbing side affects and problems that will occur as you age with this disease. I've been diagnosed full blown AIDS since 2001 and was also diagnosed with wasting as well, my weight fluctuates going from as high as 160 to as low as 120.In time it will get easier as it becomes a fact of life you can not change.Believe in yourself.This is how I look now, not bad huh.

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Hiv+ since 1991, AIDS since 2001

 


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