New to hiv

[Newtolife]

Hi there

Took me a while before deciding to post here. Till now i cannt believe that i am positive. The story started in May when i got mild fever and that time i though i have flu. I took some antibitiotics because i though it would be a normal flu symptoms. After three days i felt my fever is a bit high 38.1. I visited my gp who requested for cbc. After one day my cbc result wasnt tht good and my doctor asked me to stop any antibiotics. The next day i felt realy bad and went to emergency doctor who prescribed for me voltaren and augmuntin. After three days i couldnt handle the fever then i went to the hospital and the specialist after running cbc, he asked me if i had been exposed to any hiv or stds and i said no because i never had unsafe sex. After three days of not sleeping i decided to go and check for hiv and i did and the result came back negative which made me soo happy . Few days later i started gettng mild fever again and my doctor though i might have lymphoma, viral attack like ebv or cmu. After runng all the tests , all of them were negative then he said it might be fever of unknown origin and gave me prednisolone for 10 days. Thankfully after two days fever went off, but i was still not feeling ok!!! After a month i decided to visit infectious specialist since i felt i am gettng itchy skin etc... And here where i got shocked again when the dr directly asked me did i do hiv test!! I said yes and was negative back in May!! She said we need to do the VL to make sure it is negative. Unfortunately after one day i came to knw i am hiv positive which till now after two weeks i am unable to believe it. I dnt do unsafe sex, too careful of my health. My cd4 was 336 and vl 63,000 , the doctor gave me viraday( generic of atripla) he did other tests like hepatitis and stds to ensure i am negative which came back negative, been on atriple now for 10 days i only face disturbance or kind or insomnia but in general it is not that bad.
I am really depressed and i knw this is nt good for me since i need to forget it to be able to fight the virus. I am tryng not to think about it but i cannt . Mornng and evenng all day . Been isolated from everyone. My mom knew about it and she is tryng to be near me supportng me but i am still unable to accept it
I hope i will be over it soon

[Newtolife]

I am feeling lonely, how i can connect with people? I meant online or through whatsup! Arent there any chating room?

[mecch]

Hey welcome to this forum.

Unfortunately, this forum doesn't have live chat rooms. 

Where do you live, if you want to say?  Any way to connect with HIV+ people where you live?  What about your friends (other than mom)? 

It sort of difficult to suggest ways of cutting the loneliness unless we know something particular about your life situation.

Listen its perfectly routine for someone with a new HIV+ diagnosis to have rolling, preoccupying thoughts about HIV and going forward with it.  But eventually, that settles down and for many, eventually it disappears. Really.

Let me tell you, you can be depressed or anxious and it doesn't matter as along as you take the pills, the pills fight the virus. This is a hard thing for some newly diagnosed to realise, but really, its not the mind that fights this disease, its just the stupid (but MOST APPRECIATED) medicine.  So don't worry about not being strong to fight the virus - the pills are doing it.

After the shock calms down, you'll need your mental energy, true, to adjust to being an HIV+ person - the status of that.

As for the little side effects you notice, for many, they settle down on Atripla.  Try not to take it with a lot of fat in your meals or snacks.

Hopefully you will feel calmer soon and even if you are thinking about HIV all the time, when you are ready, it would be a good idea NOT to avoid your usual social contacts. Even if you suspect you might have to "go through the motions", going through the motions in many instances is the first step in cutting the rolling thoughts about HIV.  Eventually the daily life just comes back and occupies the mind, like before. You don't even have to disclose to these social relations if you don't want to.  Just hang out and eventually someone or something is going to distract you from your thoughts of HIV.

[Newtolife]

Thanks mecch for your reply, well i live in middle east, i am trying to be surrounded by people but i am always thinking about my status. I am really affraid of future prognosis of the disease!!! Regarding the medication i am taking it on daily basis same timing with multivitamins as well, vit D and planng to get some calcium and selenium pills because i knw they are good for immune system and bones.
I am feeling worried about tomorrow which i didnt before i knew i am poz.
Adding to this, i dnt use to smoke alot but since i knew two weeks ago, i am smokng alot but i dnt drink alchohol or use drugs !! Is it normal reaction?

[mecch]

Listen its normal to smoke if one's mind is racing!  Its a kind of distraction, and its meditative. You can worry about cutting down on the cigs when your mind calms down
Exercise could help you, and you can do that alone, if you don't want to be with people.

I want to tell you what doctors in Western Europe say - you don't need any supplements for living with HIV and living well - you just need the medicine - the antivirals.

Unless you are specifically tested and a nutritionist says you have a lack of vitamins or minerals, you don't need calcium and selenium.

Yes, its really common that people think they need to take supplements or change their diets to support the immune system when they get HIV.  Well, how was your diet before diagnosis? Do you eat good food? Thats probably enough. 

Again, its the drugs we take that fight HIV. That's it. 

Yep its usual to worry about tomorrow when you get a diagnosis.  But, look above, I'm telling you and others will repeat.  Just like what my swiss specialists told me - plan on your normal lifespan, your normal health. 

You are taking a very effective medicine. It will knock down the virus.

Take your combination with a light snack and not too much calories or fatty food.

I can only imagine all the delicious food you can eat where you live, and I'm jealous cause these days I am craving koshari which of course is impossible to find in Switzerland or maybe anywhere outside egypt?

I'm going to go have a boring greek salad and clean my kitchen. 

Keep cool. Others will welcome you in this forum in the next day or two when they see your post.

[Wade]

Hi and Welcome !
I know things seem overwhelming to you now but you will be fine .
There are many wise people here some have been living with HIV for more than 30 years myself included. Im sure many of the newer folks will weigh in on their own experiences and journeys most are like your own.

Continue to take your meds and don't let HIV rule your life, as Meech said once you are back into your normal routine you wont even think about this disease. One more thing,  make sure your doctor is aware of all supplements you are taking its just a good idea.
Now...go out, enjoy your life and have some fun 

Best Wade

[Newtolife]

Thanks alot for supporting but it is really hard . I am unable to minggle with people!
It is just about time i believe. And really good to get connected with u guys. It made my day today better !! Just a question, how long does it take for complications of the disease to start?

[Ptrk3]

You shouldn't have any "complications" of HIV infection, now that you are on meds.  Just keep on taking your meds and live your life! 

[Newtolife]

Why i have read that most hiv patients will get hepatitis or pneumonia or osteoporsis etc...

[Jim Allen]

This is the truth, every time you are worried read this post back to yourself. 

You shouldn't have any "complications" of HIV infection, now that you are on meds.  Just keep on taking your meds and live your life! 

Just Like I said in my first post to you, you are on the right track, you have started treatment and have your followup appointments planed. So attend your doc appointments,take your meds, be adherent and you will be grand.

Jim

[Newtolife]

You are right Jim !! I need to live and havng it with me in my life nt having it controling my life

[Jim Allen]

 

Look it takes a while to get your mind around the fact that you are living with HIV.
Try not to overthink it.

Jim

[mecch]

Why i have read that most hiv patients will get hepatitis or pneumonia or osteoporsis etc...

Read very current things, like this blog, or articles in magazines published now.  You would get hepatitis from contact with that virus and it has nothing to do with you being HIV+ or HIV-.   Pneumonia is a risk if someone is untreated for HIV and loses their immune system. This is not your case.  Osteoporosis - that I can't comment on, but you could ask a doctor about that. I never heard of a link.

The experience of living for a long time with HIV infection is being written now.  people who are in their 60s and have it 30 years are having a DIFFERENT experience than a person getting HIV now and who will live their lifespan in the future.

I told you what my doc said - take the medicine and go about your life as normal. Be ambitious at work and pursue love and save for retirement.

[Newtolife]

Just a clarification , i am
Using viraday ( generic of atripla ) because this is the one offered in my country for free. From your experience , both have same effect ?

[mecch]

Yes your drugs are the exact same 3 molecules as the branded Atripla version. Millions use the generics, they work.

[Expat1]

Welcome to the forum. 

You will have a normal life span.  The drugs do their job.  Atripla and the generics that are based on it are exactly the same.  So dont be concerned by that.   

Take the drugs as recommended by your doctor.

Regarding supplements I quote my HIV specialist.  "Supplements, I know nothing about them.  I suggest you throw them all away.  Its the HIV medicine that will keep you healthy."

In fact many supplements render some hiv drugs ineffective.  The advice about only taking medicine/supplements at the Dr.  recommendation is good.

Know that you started treatment before any complications and if you keep up the treatment you shouldnt get any hiv complecations.  Occasionally they might need to modify the regiment for various reasons.  Thats why we get monitored by liver tests, virus load, CD4 counts.

[Newtolife]

Thanks all for replying
Really makinng a difference in me day by day
One thing that with atripla i am facing irregular sleeping !! I knw this is one of the side effect, but will i be back to normal sleepng pattern after sometimes!! Been on atripla for 14 days now.

[Gladiator]

Newtolife I hope my new post can help a bit
http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=63669.msg709867#msg709867

Hugs

Gladiator

[Newtolife]

@gladiator , thanks alot for your post
Really helpfull .

[Gladiator]

@newtolife glad to know this. I've been in hell for one month. Now I am doing great. Undetectable after 2 weeks on meds, no side effect, apart from those I was imagining and auto-inflicting , I am perfectly healthy with prefect blood values. I bet you'll be the same.

Be strong and live.

Hug

Glad.