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Author Topic: Concerned , some feedback please  (Read 7663 times)

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Offline lopez

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Concerned , some feedback please
« on: June 23, 2006, 01:43:05 pm »

Hi there, first of all i would like to thank anyone reading this post,
in all honesty ive been feeling preety bad on these last few days cause of a situation i will describe ...

My friends had a bachelor party which i attended, they hired 4 very beautiful girls (exotic dancers) from
a known club here in Panama, as expected we were pretty drunk and in my case i think i did two
very stupid things.

First one girl put some chantilly cream on her vagina in front of all of us, for someone to eat the
chantilly and silly me i jumped in and literally ate the chantilly and her like i was doing it to my girlfriend ...

Then, the offered private sessions, again, as im a moron i paid one and she offered to give me a blowjob which she did with a condom, but i gave her oral sex without any protection. Thats pretty much what happened, im sure we all have little scratches or little wounds on our mouths most of the times, (we bite our cheeks , etc etc) , so next day i woke up first of all with a terrible moral hungover, and with this terrible worry i had contracted HIV.

I dont know that girls hiv status, i only know its a decent club where they work but obviously that means nothing, a couple friends, one which is a doctor told me not to worry, but reading a lot on the internet made me sick ...

2 days after that stupid event, i started feeling some thorat pain, today, 4 days after that my tonsils have white spots and there is obviously some kind of infection going on. I know this can be cause of the rough party we had, lots of alcohol until very very late, maybe my defenses went down a bit, but i am really stresses about all this.

Mostly waiting 3 months under the stress levels im handling at this moment, i want to clear that i had no intercourse whatsoever, the part that worries me is giving that girl oral sex
(who in the world gives oral sex to a stripper? it had to be me, im such a freaking moron i tell you)

I read the welcome hiv explanation, but i want to know if you guys/gals know about a case of 'HIV cause of cunilingus, please help me a little bit ...

Thanks for your consideration.

Fred Lopez

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Concerned , some feedback please
« Reply #1 on: June 23, 2006, 03:27:03 pm »
Fred,

Good news, you haven't had a risk of hiv infection and you don't need to test over this specific incident. Going down on a woman is NOT a risk for hiv infection. There has never been a documented case of infection in this way and you won't be the first.

Please read through the Welcome Thread and follow the lessons links for more information on hiv transmission.

And while you're here, let me fill you in on a few other things.

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL STIs together. To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with a sexually transmitted infection.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results. Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

You haven't had a risk of hiv infection in anything you bring to us. No risk.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline lopez

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Re: Concerned , some feedback please
« Reply #2 on: June 23, 2006, 03:45:01 pm »
Ann, thanks a lot for the prompt response,
i really admire you people for the work you do here, and i say that cause ive been reading a lot on the forum on the last couple hours.

Thanks a lot for the response, in all honesty im usually a very relaxed guy, im not into hookers or casual sex since im on a stable relationship, however my animalistic part jumped that night, i guess cause of the moment, the mixture of the moral hungover and my panic ... cause HIV makes me panic really have taken a load on me on the past few days, i even cried at night thinking that i might transmit HIV to my girlfriend in this period before i take a test.

I really appreciate your comments, they made me feel way more confident about me being negative, some people may find this amusing, but I intend and will try to remain away from this events, as it showed there is a part on my flesh i was unable to control , i guess we all live with that inner hunger and basic instincts ...

God bless you all, in all honesty im amazed at the work here, you turned such an evil thing as AIDS / HIV into a blessing for lots of people, information makes miracles in people, and you are informing people, and doing it without all the usual moral barriers you find in some other places, i see you people are blunt, direct and dont mind talking about it freely, without barriers.

Kudos!

Im even feeling compelled to work with hiv/aids people locally, its a terrible decease, its a terrible society the one we live in, its not easy, and Ann and the rest, you are survivors !

I dont know if you people beleive in a God or not, but i do, and i ask HIM to bless you from the bottom of my heart.

Fred
« Last Edit: June 23, 2006, 03:47:01 pm by lopez »

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Concerned , some feedback please
« Reply #3 on: June 23, 2006, 09:03:32 pm »
I'm glad you found the exchange to be so helpful.

Like Ann I feel confident you were not exposed to HIV during that bachelor party.


I can certainly understand that you may want to get tested just to collect the inevitable negative result and remove any lingering doubts you may have. 

Cheers,
Andy Velez

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Concerned , some feedback please
« Reply #4 on: June 24, 2006, 05:31:05 am »
Fred,

Glad to help.

If you want to help out at an organisation near you, you can find one by going to aidsmap.com's world-wide organisation database.

Even if you don't volunteer at an hiv/aids organisation, you can do your bit by making sure your friends and family members understand the risks - and non-risks - of hiv transmission and prevention. Lead by example and urge them to get regular sexual health care check-ups and to use condoms.

Use condoms and avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline lopez

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  • Posts: 9
Re: Concerned , some feedback please
« Reply #5 on: June 26, 2006, 01:49:30 am »

Thx a lot for the link Ann ...

and thanks everybody :)

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Concerned , some feedback please
« Reply #6 on: June 26, 2006, 06:29:26 am »
Lopez,

You're welcome.

And don't forget, like charity, hiv awareness and education begins at home. Make sure your teenage children, nieces, nephews and any other sexually active family members know the score about condoms and regular sexual health care check-ups. Your friends too - you just might save some lives.

Have a nice life... ;)

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline lopez

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  • Posts: 9
Re: Concerned , some feedback please
« Reply #7 on: August 14, 2006, 02:15:39 pm »


Hi all ... its me Lopez again,

although as you people told me my risk was non - to extremely low i felt that for my complete sake of mind i needed a test, i just came back from my test, they will be giving me the result at 5pm, its noon down here.

On regards to this, the event in question happened on June 20 and its August 14 ...

54 days since the event , when i get the result, as i hope it tunrs negative, you people think i can consider that 54 day window conclusive? or ... almost conclusive?

Thanks and blessings

Offline Ann

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  • Member
  • Posts: 28,134
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Concerned , some feedback please
« Reply #8 on: August 14, 2006, 02:45:06 pm »
Lopez,

Considering you did not have a risk in the first place, your negative result will be conclusive.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline lopez

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  • Posts: 9
Re: Concerned , some feedback please
« Reply #9 on: August 14, 2006, 03:09:29 pm »
Thanks for your response Ann,
but my question is more related towards the 54 day window, a test on a 54 day window is considered a serious test? or its a too small window of time?

Thanks a lot for your patience

Offline jkinatl2

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  • Posts: 6,007
  • Doo. Dah. Dipp-ity.
Re: Concerned , some feedback please
« Reply #10 on: August 14, 2006, 03:42:22 pm »
For people who have had an identifiable HIV risk, a test 13 weeks past the incident is considered definitive. Most people seroconvert within six weeks or so, with the average being 22 days. But three months is the standard, to make sure. Anything before that is helpful, but not conclusive.

However, and I think this information has failed to penetrate your psyche:

you had NO risk for HIV.

Therefore you do not need to test specifically over the incident.

Now, if you ACTUALLY had unprotected vaginal or anal intercourse, this concern is warranted.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline lopez

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Re: Concerned , some feedback please
« Reply #11 on: August 14, 2006, 03:45:19 pm »
Thanks a ton for the answer ...

no i did not have unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse ...
my main issue is oral sex.

Altohugh its been like 7-8 weeks since the incident, i will consider it as definitive. Im a hard headed and i worry a lot,

i appreciate the patience again.

Blessings

Offline lopez

  • Member
  • Posts: 9
Re: Concerned , some feedback please
« Reply #12 on: August 15, 2006, 12:04:41 am »
Well, i got my result and its negative ... i feel so good.

Thanks a lot :) i am happy guy ... although its 54 days since the so called event ...
i think i will call it quits

;)

 


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