POZ Community Forums
HIV Prevention and Testing => Do I Have HIV? => Topic started by: stiilshaken on March 07, 2007, 12:49:18 pm
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I just got back from being tested after 6, 10 and 14 weeks - negative. I also tested for syphilis and gonnarhea and chlamydia at local health dept - negative. I had an encounter with another male who performed rimming on me and then I was the receptive partner for anal sex with condom used from start to finish no breaks in the condom and he ejaculated outside of me. My common sense told me I was OK and this was safe but I have seen some conflicting information on the web about these activities and some conflicting and maybe some misinformation from the CDC hotline ( 6 month window period) and the counselor regarding transmission. So I been freaked for a pretty long time, I am married and now feel terrible about the whole thing. The guy I was with did not know his status, also married but was a stranger. I was worried about fluid on the condom and was told rimming is not safe. So, whats the real deal on my risk? Secondly, I do not want to be nervous about having sex with my wife and some sights had a six month window period. I took the orasure hiv1/2 test with the oral swab each time. He told me I was negative and not to come back, 3 months is good with that test it is very accurate. Please set me straight. Why the conflict in window period?
Am I safe to have sex with my wife? I promised myself i will no longer worry or surf the net if you guys say all is well...i may just have a drink to celebrate. Thanks
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The quick answer is you are HIV negative. Period. End of story.
Condoms provide very effective protection. They do the job whether intercourse is vaginal or anal.
There's absolutely no reason based in HIV science for you to doubt the validity of your negative test result.
The CDC has for quite some time recommended 13 weeks as a reliable testing point except in situations involving either IV drug use or when someone has a severely depleted immune system such as during treatment for cancer. Neither of those qualifications apply to you.
You can have safely have unprotected intercourse with your wife.
It seems to me your concerns are really about head stuff -- discomfort with having strayed and specifically with another man. In any case, whether I am right about that or not, HIV is not an issue for you. Get on with your life.
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Thank you for your quick reply. My heart was still pounding as I wrote my story, probably for the reasons you mentioned regarding msm. It's tough to have those scary thoughts with no one to tell about it, and the web is usually not a good place to go, except in this case I feel much better. It's time to put away this sexual addiction stuff and just be happy nothing went wrong. It's good to have a clean slate. I think there are differences in what is theoretical risk vs what is reality and special thanks for expaining the 3 vs 6 month caveat. Even though you said I had no risk either, I'm still glad I tested out. Thanks alot for your reassurance and best of luck and health to you Sir. I will begin my celebration!
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Being isolated with that stuff running around in your head is its own kind of living hell. So I'm glad you benefited from the support we can offer here.
Forgive yourself for being a dawg like all the rest of us guys. The most loving thing you can do for all concerned is to get on with your life. No kidding.
Cheers,
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hi ,i did not want my email address to show . what do I do? the box is checked..ty
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You can always see your own email address in your profile, no one else can see it.
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thanks rod, sorry bout that!
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I recently gave a guy a blow job using protection. I was careful to roll the condom down all the way and did not see anything unusual.
However, when he was semi erect I went down deep and may have made skin to skin contact with his groin area.
It was fun but I had some remorse about it. My concern is, I had read that condoms are not as effective at protecting you from syphilis and that this STD is becoming more and more common. Do you think this is something to be concerned about? I may be just paranoid, but I respect your opinions. On that same subject, is it ok to kiss or give or get a handjob regarding syphilis?
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Keep all your questions and concerns in your orginal thread. Your question will not be answered until you put it in your orginal thread.
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Rod, it's been over a year and wanted to start a new topic..what do I do just hit reply?
thanks
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I recently gave a guy a blow job using protection. I was careful to roll the condom all the way down and did not see anything unusual.
however, when he was semi-erect I went down deep and may have made skin to skin contact.
My concern is, I had read that condoms do not protect you as well regarding syphilis for this very reason. I had read ths STD is on the rise, so I wanted to know what you think. I may be paranoid, but i respect and trust your opinions. On that same subject, is it safe to get or give a handjob or kiss regarding syphilis. Sorry I posted wrong before.
Was this a safe encounter?
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Please follow our rules and keep all of your entries in this same thread. I've merged your threads.
This is an HIV-specific website. We don't discuss other STDs. Other STDs are much easier to acquire than HIV, so what we do say is that anyone who's sexually active ought to regularly have a full STD panel done. That means at least annually.
As far as risk in relation to giving a blowjob, there is much more evidence to support that it's not risk than the other way around. Yes, from time to time we hear of someone who insists their only risk was giving head to some guy. But those cases simply don't hold up under scientific scrutiny. Certainly if you have an open oral sore in your mouth from surgery or poor oral care it seems wise to not be giving head or at least not unprotected.
But the stronger evidence against risk is well supported by the longterm studies of sero-discordant couples, both gay and straight. Over extended periods of time with lots of mutual unprotected oral and only protected vaginal/anal intercourse, not one sero-negative partner has become infected.
So you have to choose your own comfort zone about this issue. Nothing you have reported suggests risk for HIV to me.
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I suppose I can be confusing. The quick question should have been do condoms protect you from other STDS, like syphilis, as well, HIV?
I promose not to bother you guys with another follow up
Peace
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Syphilis is a complicated organism with complex modes of transmission. As Andy notes we're an HIV site so an in depth discussion about syphilis of the kind you seek is beyond the scope of what we do here.
I suggest you contact your local sexual health service and seek advice from them.
Oh, and by the way:
I promose not to bother you guys with another follow up
You will be held to that promise.
MtD
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I recently had an encounter with another male and we engaged in protected oral and he fingered me. I come to find out he was into barebacking. I wanted to know if I need to be tested and if there was an risks, including HIV in being fingered analy. He was not into using the condoms so I kind of cut our meeting short, I'm just trying to be extra safe and feel worried. He was not bleeding but I could not tell if he had any small cuts or scrapes on his fingers. I also dont think there was any precum or saliva on his finger.
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At no time were you at risk of contracting HIV from fingering.
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Thank you Rod, appreciated.
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The only confirmed risks for sexual transmission of HIV are unprotected vaginal and anal intercourse. Other sexual activities are risky theoretically but experience and time have proven that sexual risk is about unprotected intercourse. Use condoms all the time for those activities and you will be well protected.
Cheers.
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Hi...I had given oral to another male and received. He did not come in my mouth nor did I notice any precum. I did come in his and just wanted reassurance this is a safe activity re:HIV. Do I need to test or get pep ?
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I should have just reread the answers you already gave me.
Sorry bout that, I am all good