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Author Topic: True Confessions  (Read 16075 times)

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Offline ademas

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True Confessions
« on: July 31, 2006, 11:09:05 am »
Sometimes I call the dog by buzzing the electric can opener.

Offline MSPspud

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  • Joined Mar 2005 - Formerly UofMurbs
Re: True Confessions
« Reply #1 on: July 31, 2006, 04:23:43 pm »
Sometimes I postpone feeding the cats in the morning so they keep getting louder to irritate my sleeping boyfriend.

Offline lydgate

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #2 on: July 31, 2006, 06:24:02 pm »
Sometimes I'll have two pints of ice cream for dinner.
Her finely-touched spirit had still its fine issues, though they were not widely visible. Her full nature, like that river of which Cyrus broke the strength, spent itself in channels which had no great name on the earth. But the effect of her being on those around her was incalculably diffusive: for the growing good of the world is partly dependent on unhistoric acts; and that things are not so ill with you and me as they might have been, is half owing to the number who lived faithfully a hidden life, and rest in unvisited tombs.

George Eliot, Middlemarch, final paragraph

Offline Dachshund

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #3 on: July 31, 2006, 06:59:09 pm »
Sometimes I'll have two pints of ice cream for dinner.


From your pic you might want to drop down to one pint. ;D

Offline Life

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #4 on: July 31, 2006, 07:08:07 pm »
Sometimes I stick my fingers in empty light sockets.. ;D

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #5 on: July 31, 2006, 07:18:34 pm »
Sometimes I stick my tongue out and let my ferrets lick it.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline Life

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #6 on: July 31, 2006, 07:19:18 pm »
Eeeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwwwww ;D

Offline J.R.E.

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #7 on: July 31, 2006, 07:45:45 pm »
 :o


I had a cockatiel for about 15 years. When he would sit perched on my finger, he would immediately start rubbing his little sex organ against me. His wings would open up wide, and he was basically humping away on my hand twisting himself all over the place, trying to get off At first I thought perhaps he had mites and was just trying to scratch himself on me. But I knew what he was doing. After he was through rubbing himself ( about 40 seconds) he would fly back to his cage, with what appeared to be a smirk on his beak  :)


My bird was gay like his master. I always thought he was,He always kept a tidy cage :D

Does that make me a prevert ?  :)




Ray
Current Meds ; Viramune / Epzicom Eliquis, Diltiazem. Pravastatin 80mg, Ezetimibe. UPDATED 2/18/24
 Tested positive in 1985,.. In October of 2003, My t-cell count was 16, Viral load was over 500,000, Percentage at that time was 5%. I started on  HAART on October 24th, 2003.

 As of Oct 2nd, 2023, Viral load Undetectable.
CD 4 @676 /  CD4 % @ 18 %
Lymphocytes,absolute-3815 (within range)


72 YEARS YOUNG

Offline lydgate

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #8 on: July 31, 2006, 07:46:57 pm »
Sometimes I'll drink several glases of wine while listening to sad songs so that I feel all weepy and self-pitying in a satisfying sort of way.
Her finely-touched spirit had still its fine issues, though they were not widely visible. Her full nature, like that river of which Cyrus broke the strength, spent itself in channels which had no great name on the earth. But the effect of her being on those around her was incalculably diffusive: for the growing good of the world is partly dependent on unhistoric acts; and that things are not so ill with you and me as they might have been, is half owing to the number who lived faithfully a hidden life, and rest in unvisited tombs.

George Eliot, Middlemarch, final paragraph

Offline J.R.E.

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #9 on: July 31, 2006, 07:47:37 pm »


I've got to add also, I bought him a female and he wanted nothing to do with her....
Current Meds ; Viramune / Epzicom Eliquis, Diltiazem. Pravastatin 80mg, Ezetimibe. UPDATED 2/18/24
 Tested positive in 1985,.. In October of 2003, My t-cell count was 16, Viral load was over 500,000, Percentage at that time was 5%. I started on  HAART on October 24th, 2003.

 As of Oct 2nd, 2023, Viral load Undetectable.
CD 4 @676 /  CD4 % @ 18 %
Lymphocytes,absolute-3815 (within range)


72 YEARS YOUNG

Offline Teresa

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #10 on: July 31, 2006, 08:00:41 pm »
Ray,

it only makes you a pervert if you got off also....LOL
Hubby HIV+ 5/5/06
CD4:320
  %: 26.7
 VL: <20
Atripla (started it 8/24/06)

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #11 on: July 31, 2006, 08:04:20 pm »
I think the line is crossed when you start putting birdseed in your underpants.

:)
"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline J.R.E.

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #12 on: July 31, 2006, 08:12:17 pm »
Lol,

I would have crushed the poor thing, if I rubbed against him.

"I think the line is crossed when you start putting birdseed in your underpants." Wouldn't be the first time I had two peckers in my underpants ;D  LOL.....  Did I say that   !!
Current Meds ; Viramune / Epzicom Eliquis, Diltiazem. Pravastatin 80mg, Ezetimibe. UPDATED 2/18/24
 Tested positive in 1985,.. In October of 2003, My t-cell count was 16, Viral load was over 500,000, Percentage at that time was 5%. I started on  HAART on October 24th, 2003.

 As of Oct 2nd, 2023, Viral load Undetectable.
CD 4 @676 /  CD4 % @ 18 %
Lymphocytes,absolute-3815 (within range)


72 YEARS YOUNG

Offline Basquo

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #13 on: July 31, 2006, 08:59:35 pm »
Quote
Sometimes I'll drink several glases of wine while listening to sad songs so that I feel all weepy and self-pitying in a satisfying sort of way.

I do the same thing listening to a disc I burned for my ex after leaving him...one that I never sent him. :-\

Offline allopathicholistic

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #14 on: July 31, 2006, 09:22:26 pm »

From your pic you might want to drop down to one pint. ;D

LOL!!

Jay, please tell me you'll do your best to not subject your body to ice cream atrocities

Offline Teresa

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #15 on: July 31, 2006, 09:33:05 pm »
Lol,
"I think the line is crossed when you start putting birdseed in your underpants." Wouldn't be the first time I had two peckers in my underpants ;D  LOL.....  Did I say that   !!

LMAO!!!

Teresa
Hubby HIV+ 5/5/06
CD4:320
  %: 26.7
 VL: <20
Atripla (started it 8/24/06)

Offline HIVworker

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #16 on: July 31, 2006, 09:39:31 pm »
I once tried to trip someone up in a school sprint race because I was losing, in kindergarten. I was 32 at the time.

R
NB. Any advice about HIV is given in addition to your own medical advice and not intended to replace it. You should never make clinical decisions based on what anyone says on the internet but rather check with your ID doctor first. Discussions from the internet are just that - Discussions. They may give you food for thought, but they should not direct you to do anything but fuel discussion.

Offline whizzer

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #17 on: July 31, 2006, 09:53:35 pm »
This brings to mind the quote:

"Kinky is using a feather; perverted is using the whole chicken"

It wasn't you that was perverted Ray - just the bird. 

I've heard of being a bird-brain, but this is the first I've heard of a bird-bottom.

In all seriousness, I think it may have been the cage that was the problem.  They say prison does things to a guy.

Just Sayin' TM

-Whizzer
(who sometimes puts his extra garbage in the next-door-neighbor's can)

Offline ademas

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #18 on: July 31, 2006, 09:58:16 pm »
Sometimes I stick my tongue out and let my ferrets lick it.


HAR!!

(I've kissed Bob the yorkie on the lips before...freaks him out more than me!)

and it was I who put my sister's favorite troll doll in a tuperware container filled with water and froze it in a block of ice. 


Offline lydgate

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #19 on: July 31, 2006, 10:35:16 pm »
Played King Herod ("Jesus, I'm overjoyed to meet you face to face...") in the high-school production of Jesus Christ Superstar, but secretly wanted to play Mary Magdalene ("I don't know how to love him..."). Jesus was hot!
Her finely-touched spirit had still its fine issues, though they were not widely visible. Her full nature, like that river of which Cyrus broke the strength, spent itself in channels which had no great name on the earth. But the effect of her being on those around her was incalculably diffusive: for the growing good of the world is partly dependent on unhistoric acts; and that things are not so ill with you and me as they might have been, is half owing to the number who lived faithfully a hidden life, and rest in unvisited tombs.

George Eliot, Middlemarch, final paragraph

Offline joyluckclub

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #20 on: July 31, 2006, 10:46:44 pm »
As a teacher, you try to be the professional at all times.  Sometimes one of your student's parent is a real HOTTIE.

This year I had a student who was as sweet as can be.  Her father....ohhh.....her father was an ADONIS.

I made sure to ask

1.  Is your daddy coming in for parent/teacher conference?

2.  When your mom comes, make sure your dad comes too!

3.  Make sure you invite your dad to awards day!  Its a special day for you.  He should be here to see you receive your awards! (It was a special day for me because he came!)

4.  Is your dad coming to the carnival?  I think he would enjoy seeing you have fun!

Anyway,  I think I would have made a wonderful stepmother!! LOL
« Last Edit: July 31, 2006, 11:07:18 pm by joyluckclub »
"Honey, be who you is"  Madea.........

Offline livingpositively

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #21 on: August 01, 2006, 02:31:27 am »
At a work meeting a couple years ago, a friend of mine and I snuck away from the bar while everyone else stayed and got their party on.  We went around to all of the rooms in the hotel that we knew were occupied by "our" people and put gobs of "shit" all over the doorknobs.
4/6/07   CD4 450, % 23, No VL
2/19/07 CD4 487, % 26, VL 47,500
1/4/07   CD4 357, % 27, No VL
10/3/06 CD4 500, % 26, VL 18,000
7/6/06   CD4 530, % 29, VL 83,800
4/6/06   CD4 555, % 28, VL 13,000

Offline Life

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #22 on: August 01, 2006, 11:13:26 am »
I kneed Santa in the nuts when getting on his lap when I was very  little and all I remember him saying was "Ho HO HO. SON OF A BITCH!"  All the little kids looked up at their Mom's and covered there mouths.  It was weird.. I still got my presents however... Later I was diagnosed with ADD...  That was the last time I got to sit on Santa's lap.. :o
« Last Edit: August 01, 2006, 11:24:18 am by Eric »

Offline livingpositively

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #23 on: August 01, 2006, 12:06:49 pm »
OMG...That is hysterical, Eric.   ;D ;D
4/6/07   CD4 450, % 23, No VL
2/19/07 CD4 487, % 26, VL 47,500
1/4/07   CD4 357, % 27, No VL
10/3/06 CD4 500, % 26, VL 18,000
7/6/06   CD4 530, % 29, VL 83,800
4/6/06   CD4 555, % 28, VL 13,000

Offline MSPspud

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #24 on: August 02, 2006, 07:26:36 pm »
At a work meeting a couple years ago, a friend of mine and I snuck away from the bar while everyone else stayed and got their party on.  We went around to all of the rooms in the hotel that we knew were occupied by "our" people and put gobs of "shit" all over the doorknobs.

Ok, where'd you get the "shit" ?

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #25 on: August 02, 2006, 07:36:18 pm »
Years ago, when two vegetarian friends would visit for dinner, I would make the vegetable soup with chicken stock and not tell them.  ;D

They raved about my vegetable soup.

MtD

Offline Joe K

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #26 on: August 02, 2006, 08:22:54 pm »
After my abusive ex-partner was put in jail, tried and convicted and sent packing back to Michigan I still had all of his clothes.  They made the most satisfying bon fire that I have ever had.  I then mailed him the ashes when his parents called and inquired about his clothes.  Never heard from him since... hum.

Offline DingoBoi

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #27 on: August 02, 2006, 09:05:54 pm »
i chased a baby salamander down the hallway wall to a foot or two off the ground.... it probably would have went lower but puppy ate it.   

She loves her living treaties.   I think she likes the wiggle.


Offline Mouse

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #28 on: August 02, 2006, 09:21:13 pm »
My cat has this issue where if you scratch the base of his tail he starts biting his chest and biting out fur and stuff and meowing.



I'm sure it annoys him, but I do it all the time anyway and laugh because it's so ridiculous.



The vet said it's because he's fat and he can't reach back there to clean, so it's like overwhelming for him.
Hahahahaha.


I'm mean. :D

Offline fearless

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #29 on: August 02, 2006, 09:34:18 pm »
I attacked my sister and tried to suffocate her with a pillow once when sleep walking  ;D
(anyone wanna share a room with me in Montreal. lol)
Be forgiving, be grateful, be optimistic

Offline livingpositively

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #30 on: August 02, 2006, 10:11:31 pm »
EEEWWW!!!!  It wasn't really SHIT, as in feces.  LOL

Just "stuff" because they would all be drunk and just walk into their room and plop into bed.

Although the REAL THING would have been much funnier...but I can't handle getting that close to it.  hehe  Guess you could say I'm a little fecaphobic.
4/6/07   CD4 450, % 23, No VL
2/19/07 CD4 487, % 26, VL 47,500
1/4/07   CD4 357, % 27, No VL
10/3/06 CD4 500, % 26, VL 18,000
7/6/06   CD4 530, % 29, VL 83,800
4/6/06   CD4 555, % 28, VL 13,000

Offline Sdgirl

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #31 on: August 02, 2006, 10:42:03 pm »
Okay sometimes................all right damn it.......ALL the time I let my cat Moe suck on my ear til his slobber drips down my neck.  He has been doing this since he was a baby and I love it!  He sits there in anticipation and starts to drool, it's the cutest damn thing you ever saw!

[attachment deleted by admin]
"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.  Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.  It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.  We ask ourselves.."Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?  Actually, who are you not to be?"

Offline MSPspud

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #32 on: August 02, 2006, 11:33:37 pm »
I'm a little fecaphobic too - that's why I had to ask  :)  It would have been an awesome prank though... maybe if you had really thick gloves and a doggy near by!

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #33 on: August 02, 2006, 11:43:43 pm »
I attacked my sister and tried to suffocate her with a pillow once when sleep walking  ;D
(anyone wanna share a room with me in Montreal. lol)

eep.

:)
"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline Teresa

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #34 on: August 02, 2006, 11:57:07 pm »
I have an evil older sister. We were born on the same day 5 years apart. When I was little she would tell me I was the worst birthday present she ever got. I would just cry.
I have another older sister and a younger brother. We all slept in the same bedroom (we were poor but didn't know it). We had 2 set of bunkbeds and the evil sister slept on the top bunk.

She did something that really pissed me off. Cant remember what she did....but I took a straight pin and lifted up her fitted sheet and stuck it point up so she would turn over and get stuck.

She woke the whole house up later that night with her scream. My mom came running in there and found the straight pin and said I wonder how that got in there.

I was about 7yrs old at the time. She isn't near as evil today...actually we are very close.

Teresa
Hubby HIV+ 5/5/06
CD4:320
  %: 26.7
 VL: <20
Atripla (started it 8/24/06)

Offline GSOgymrat

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #35 on: August 03, 2006, 12:56:14 am »
The only time I have ever stolen anything was when I was 19. I really wanted to buy a particular Playgirl magazine but didn't have the nerve to face the middleaged woman working the counter at the local newsstand. When she wasn't looking I stuck the magazine down my shirt and walked out. I felt so guilty as I was driving home that I returned to the newsstand put the money on the counter when she wasn't looking. I still have that magazine!

Offline allopathicholistic

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #36 on: August 03, 2006, 01:55:32 am »
Sometimes I hang up on chatty people and blame it on the cell phone battery

And I feel no guilt whatsoever

When they say "You should get a better phone" I think "YEAH, UH-HUH, IN YOUR CHATTERBOX *WET-DREAMS*"

Joe, I would have tossed in a few live scorpions with those ashes

Offline JeffInNYC

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #37 on: August 03, 2006, 07:22:00 am »
:o


I had a cockatiel for about 15 years. When he would sit perched on my finger, he would immediately start rubbing his little sex organ against me. His wings would open up wide, and he was basically humping away on my hand twisting himself all over the place, trying to get off

Ray I hope thats not how the colonel coined the phrase "finger lickin' good".
ewww
 :o

Offline Lwood

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #38 on: August 03, 2006, 07:59:22 am »
I switch the stickers on the 'expensive' Tomatoes with the cheap ones.  call 911.
"Fortunately, I Keep My T Cells Numbered For Just Such An Emergency"
  -Either Foghorn Leghorn or Johnny Cash

Offline ACinKC

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #39 on: August 03, 2006, 10:28:44 am »
One time when I was little, and not NEARLY the physics genius I am today, I convinced my roller skating sister she would go SUPER fast down our laminated hallway if she let me tie a rope to her feet and the other end to a door knob and let me open the door real fast! 

Luckily for us, a dentist was on call 24 hours a day, her 2 front teeth look PERFECTLY normal NOW!
LIFE is not a race to the grave with the intention of arriving safely
in a pretty and well-preserved body, but, rather to skid in broadside,
thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming--WOW! WHAT A
RIDE!!!

Offline Alain

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #40 on: August 03, 2006, 01:32:16 pm »
.
« Last Edit: November 03, 2006, 09:47:44 pm by cowandalehouse »

Offline Life

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #41 on: August 03, 2006, 09:22:22 pm »
I pushed my sister down a double diamond once..  She was young and she bounces... :D


Offline ademas

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #42 on: August 03, 2006, 09:55:16 pm »
Hahaha @ Alain and Eric!
Too funny.

Offline AlanBama

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #43 on: August 03, 2006, 10:16:39 pm »
Fang was snatched away from her mother too soon.....I stepped in as 'surrogate' mom, and even though she is one year old now, she still 'nurses' on my neck every morning.   She purrs and makes her little baby cat noises...
it is incredibly sweet (but extremely weird)

Alan and Fang the Vampire Cat

[attachment deleted by admin]
« Last Edit: August 03, 2006, 10:27:51 pm by AlanBama »
"Remember my sentimental friend that a heart is not judged by how much you love, but by how much you are loved by others." - The Wizard of Oz

Offline Life

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #44 on: August 03, 2006, 10:21:10 pm »
Oh Alan.... Your so cute!  You wana go skiing baby doll? ;D

Offline AlanBama

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Re: True Confessions
« Reply #45 on: August 03, 2006, 10:29:09 pm »
Me, on skis? that should be interesting...... :o
"Remember my sentimental friend that a heart is not judged by how much you love, but by how much you are loved by others." - The Wizard of Oz

 


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