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Author Topic: hiv positive and cancelled ivf cycles  (Read 11922 times)

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Offline tinashura

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
hiv positive and cancelled ivf cycles
« on: January 05, 2009, 04:09:18 am »
happy new year to all the wonderful women in this forum and let me also use this opportunity to thank the moderator of the forum for finding a channel where we can freely discuss.here is my story

  I am 30yrs of age, originally from Africa and live in USA.i got diagnosed 4yrs back on a routine check up.At first i was in denial because i have never been exposed but after a second test that confirmed the result,it finally downed to me that I've came to the end of the road.My viral load then was 10.000 and my CD count was 350.i was placed on sustiva and comborvir twice daily.AT first i thought my life was over and wanted to commit suicide.i prayed allot and got my strength from praying. I have never had the guts to tell my family of my diagnosis.i kept it to myself until i met my husband of today.

 When i met my husband,i was so scared to tell him the truth.i thought if i tell him,he will run away,so i kept it to myself for 1year.i was trying to get pregnant all along so that with me being pregnant,it will be very hard for him to go and even if he does,i will have a little friend.i guess that was very selfish of me.i know he was very suspicious of me because he kept asking me why i was on a regular medication and all i could tell him was that they were vitamins

 One year after trying unsuccessful to get pregnant,we decided to see a specialist.the specialist asked us to to do the screening test.i had never told him that i was positive.when the results came out,i told him i still don't want my husband to know.he advised me to tell him and if he really cares about me,he will stand by me.so i did.i had worked out everything,i knew i was going to kill myself after telling him,because i knew for sure he was going to leave.But he surprised me;he has been soo nice to me and always reminds me to take my meds.he keeps reminding me that we need to look after each other which is really true.we still carry out a very romantic relationship with use of condoms.

  The biggest stress I'm having now is i can't get pregnant.When i told my infectious dx Dr that that we were trying to get a baby,he changed my meds to rayataz,norvir and truvada;still no luck. I had an HSG to see if my tubes were open,no they were not.i had fluid in the tubes.i had a laporoscopy and my left tube was taken out.then we tried for 8months,no luck.we proceeded to iui (insemination) twice,yet no luck still.we were referred to an ivf Dr.with an undetected viral load and CD count of 500+,we were ready to proceed with ivf.My first cycle got cancelled because i was not responding to the medications.the Dr changed protocol,and re comended i did acupuncture.i did that,but the second cycle still got cancelled because i was not responding still.Then on a followup appointment with him,he told us i might be having premature ovarian decrease and will need an egg donor.Then he went again to tell me that i should be looking for the donor because he is not very sure someone will want to do not their eggs to a positive woman.PLEASE SOMEBODY TELL ME THIS IS NOT TRUE BECAUSE I READY TO LOOSE IT.

  Has anyone in the forum ever had an egg donor?if so please help me.i have been asking close people if they can help do not eggs for me but nobody is taking it seriously.i really do not know where to turn to except here on the forum.sometimes i cry and ask god WHY ME!!!!!! why do i have to be positive and infertile,i cry and pray,that for the sake of my husband,let him answer my prayers and bless me with a child.He does not deserve this.

Thank you all for taking time to read.i have never taken the time to put it out there.maybe this will make me feel better

Offline BT65

  • Global Moderator
  • Member
  • Posts: 10,786
Re: hiv positive and cancelled ivf cycles
« Reply #1 on: January 05, 2009, 08:32:56 am »
Tinashura,

I don't know anything about egg donation, but I wanted to welcome you.  I also wanted to suggest you might want to seek counseling. It sounds like you're letting your happiness depend on other people, and not yourself.  That usually only ends up in heartache. 

Please feel free to keep talking and I really hope we hear more from you.
  Luv,
Betty
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Condom and Lube Info https://www.poz.com/basics/hiv-basics/safer-sex
Please check out our lessons on PEP and PrEP. https://www.poz.com/basics/hiv-basics/pep-prep

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Offline tinashura

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: hiv positive and cancelled ivf cycles
« Reply #2 on: January 06, 2009, 02:47:14 am »
thanks Betty for welcoming me to the forum and thanks for your kind suggestions.All i need is just to live a normal life,that is why i needed to have kids.i think the fertility issue is my main problem b/c being POS has actually helped me see life in a different perspective.i will keep praying and maybe one day god will show me the path to being a mother.

Offline 27years

  • Member
  • Posts: 145
  • What I did for love I will still do it for love
Re: hiv positive and cancelled ivf cycles
« Reply #3 on: January 06, 2009, 04:43:44 am »
Just want to welcome you to the forums although i have no knowledge about your problem, but just want to wish you luck and pray that miracles will happen to you and you can conceive, Have you considered adoption if things are not working in your favour.  Don't loose hope things happen for a reason.
Nobody dies a virgin life screws us all up

Offline carmen

  • Member
  • Posts: 6
Re: hiv positive and cancelled ivf cycles
« Reply #4 on: July 23, 2009, 07:33:51 pm »
happy new year to all the wonderful women in this forum and let me also use this opportunity to thank the moderator of the forum for finding a channel where we can freely discuss.here is my story

  I am 30yrs of age, originally from Africa and live in USA.i got diagnosed 4yrs back on a routine check up.At first i was in denial because i have never been exposed but after a second test that confirmed the result,it finally downed to me that I've came to the end of the road.My viral load then was 10.000 and my CD count was 350.i was placed on sustiva and comborvir twice daily.AT first i thought my life was over and wanted to commit suicide.i prayed allot and got my strength from praying. I have never had the guts to tell my family of my diagnosis.i kept it to myself until i met my husband of today.

 When i met my husband,i was so scared to tell him the truth.i thought if i tell him,he will run away,so i kept it to myself for 1year.i was trying to get pregnant all along so that with me being pregnant,it will be very hard for him to go and even if he does,i will have a little friend.i guess that was very selfish of me.i know he was very suspicious of me because he kept asking me why i was on a regular medication and all i could tell him was that they were vitamins

 One year after trying unsuccessful to get pregnant,we decided to see a specialist.the specialist asked us to to do the screening test.i had never told him that i was positive.when the results came out,i told him i still don't want my husband to know.he advised me to tell him and if he really cares about me,he will stand by me.so i did.i had worked out everything,i knew i was going to kill myself after telling him,because i knew for sure he was going to leave.But he surprised me;he has been soo nice to me and always reminds me to take my meds.he keeps reminding me that we need to look after each other which is really true.we still carry out a very romantic relationship with use of condoms.

  The biggest stress I'm having now is i can't get pregnant.When i told my infectious dx Dr that that we were trying to get a baby,he changed my meds to rayataz,norvir and truvada;still no luck. I had an HSG to see if my tubes were open,no they were not.i had fluid in the tubes.i had a laporoscopy and my left tube was taken out.then we tried for 8months,no luck.we proceeded to iui (insemination) twice,yet no luck still.we were referred to an ivf Dr.with an undetected viral load and CD count of 500+,we were ready to proceed with ivf.My first cycle got cancelled because i was not responding to the medications.the Dr changed protocol,and re comended i did acupuncture.i did that,but the second cycle still got cancelled because i was not responding still.Then on a followup appointment with him,he told us i might be having premature ovarian decrease and will need an egg donor.Then he went again to tell me that i should be looking for the donor because he is not very sure someone will want to do not their eggs to a positive woman.PLEASE SOMEBODY TELL ME THIS IS NOT TRUE BECAUSE I READY TO LOOSE IT.

  Has anyone in the forum ever had an egg donor?if so please help me.i have been asking close people if they can help do not eggs for me but nobody is taking it seriously.i really do not know where to turn to except here on the forum.sometimes i cry and ask god WHY ME!!!!!! why do i have to be positive and infertile,i cry and pray,that for the sake of my husband,let him answer my prayers and bless me with a child.He does not deserve this.

Thank you all for taking time to read.i have never taken the time to put it out there.maybe this will make me feel better

Offline carmen

  • Member
  • Posts: 6
Re: hiv positive and cancelled ivf cycles
« Reply #5 on: July 23, 2009, 07:39:06 pm »
My husband and I are in a similar situation, we can not find a doctor to do  the procedure? Can you please give me your doctor's name, number, and address.

Offline Langie

  • Member
  • Posts: 19
Re: hiv positive and cancelled ivf cycles
« Reply #6 on: July 26, 2009, 12:59:56 pm »
greetings to all.

please read this carefully and hopefully it causes no offence.

i suppose life holds different views, worries and concerns to all of us either seroneg/ seropoz.
iam having an appointment with my doctor to see if they can make me sterile ( not able to have kids). i was on a coil even before i tested poz bacause  of the same issue but was removed 2 years ago when it started giving me painful periods.

Anyway, i have always wanted to be an egg donor but in my situation (poz) it makes me unconfortable incase someone is seroneg. anyway, just to say that i can help...please find out how the prodecure can be and if it doesnt affect my health..a happy to help you.
keep me informed or will give you my contacts so that we can talk more.

good luck.

Offline carmen

  • Member
  • Posts: 6
Re: hiv positive and cancelled ivf cycles
« Reply #7 on: July 29, 2009, 07:10:57 pm »
Do anyone know the name of a doctor to do ivf or a tubal reversal for dual hiv positive couples?
My husband and I would really like to have a child of our own. We are both undetectable and in good health.

Offline Victory101

  • Member
  • Posts: 33
Re: hiv positive and cancelled ivf cycles
« Reply #8 on: August 22, 2009, 07:08:19 pm »
Tinashara...I can understand your desire to have a baby. I had it to and have been blessed with 3 beautiful boys. I started having my kids at 35 and by 39, I had had 3. In my early 30s i was desperately trying for kids and so know how if feels and if anyone had told me that I would have 3 I would have never believed them. My advice to you is try not to be too anxious. you are still young and it is still possible and I really hope and pray that for you it does.  Hope things work out.

 


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