Suicide over possible HIV Pos

[Dume]

I have been thinking a lot recently, and to be honest, I'm getting quite scared over my situation.

I'm going to the hospital next week for a HIV test, and I've been feeling quite depressed, stressed and quite suicidal for the past couple of months. I've been talking to a friend about my situation and dose not know fully how I feel, no matter how hard I have tried telling him.

Like I've said, I've been thinking about the situation, and I know people can live well with HIV, but what scares me the most is the fact I could pass it to someone else, some one I could care about in the future. Plus it doesn't help with having the stress of education on my back too (University, Drama course).

I have reached out to a couple of people on my course, and they all say the same thing of keep positive, don't let it get to you until you get the results. But I'm scared that if it comes back positive that it could be it for me, game over.

Please help.

[Jeff G]

If you are feeling suicidal please call a friend or family member or if you need to go to the emergency room .

If you feel like you have had a risk for HIV I can move your thread into the AM I INFECTED forum for a risk assessment .

I have been HIV Poz for 30 years and I promise you that people who are HIV positive can lead fulfilling lives . If your worst fear is passing on the virus then that's easily dealt with , simply use condoms and it wont happen . I'm wishing you the best of luck .

[Ann]

Dume,

As you have not yet tested hiv positive, you are not permitted to post anywhere outside the Am I Infected forum. I have moved your thread into that forum - please keep all further posts in this thread only.

Unless you've been having unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse, or sharing drug injecting equipment, then you are quite possibly worrying for no good reason.

If you have been having unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse or sharing needles, then you need to test at three months past your last risky encounter to receive a conclusive negative result.

The earliest you should test is at six weeks. The vast majority of people who have actually been infected will seroconvert and test positive by this point, with the average time to seroconversion being only 22 days.

A six week (or more) negative must be confirmed at the three month point, but is highly unlikely to change.

Ann