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Author Topic: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen  (Read 532941 times)

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Offline denb45

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  • "1987 Classic Old School POZ+"
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #950 on: July 18, 2009, 01:07:29 pm »
Hey Ron
Hang in there Buddy.  Its going to be ok.  Watch that shower now...if you dont have a matt in it so you dont slip...get one.  I know...I really hurt myself in a slip and fall in the tub whist showering and we now have a WALK IN SHOWER.

Joel

Isn't Old age HELL.........that happen to me too Joel, and I did buy a rubber bath mat, so I won't slip or fall, I hate the fact that, I'm becoming an Geriatric AIDS patient, that is what happens when all of your friends DIE, and you have no one left :o  :'(
« Last Edit: July 18, 2009, 01:09:41 pm by denb45 »
"it's so nice to be insane, cause no-one ask you to explain" Helen Reddy cc 1974

Offline rondrond

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  • 22 years HIV+ yet a yard could be the death of me
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #951 on: August 01, 2009, 06:40:58 am »
At the Beach...



I now have: backyard beautiful. There is still some cleanup to do in the far back, but you can't see it from the house, so it can wait until I get another energy burst. I milked this last burst for all it was worth. I got the old rusted lawn furniture out of the basement and spray painted them. They are now on the front porch along with a coffee can full of dirt for Daniel's cigarette butts.

The stale smell of tobacco smoke turns my stomach every time I go out the door, but I got tired of harping about finding butts all over the porch, driveway and front curb. Daniel was supposed to already be at work, yet, he is still here. I'm afraid we have made it too comfortable for Katie's 'baby boy', with a free washer'dryer, free detergent/bleach/and dryer sheets, (which I kept finding all over the floor) and home cooked meals, though I did prepare some dishes I knew he didnt' especially like.

He ran out of money, and I caught Katie giving him her credit cards for gas and cigarettes. (I bit my tongue) I would feed him, but I refused to buy his cigarettes, harping that you might as well take two dollar bills and roll them up and burn them. If you can't afford your habits, drop them.  >:(

I got poison oak on my legs, which affected my INR level. (go figure?) Fortunately, poison oak is not like poison ivy and it didn't itch for long, it was just the red marks and scratches that looked like I had some exotic communicable disease. They are just now starting to fade and it has been over two weeks.

Last week, I got my haircut, finally. I told her short on the sides and long on the top. Well, that's what I got: one of the weirdest haircuts I have ever had, in a long time. It has had four days growth and is starting to look better, or I'm learning how to make it look better.  :-\

The next day, my nose was running like a faucet. Then I got a fever and a sore throat. I was swallowing every allergy medication I had as the Zyrtec wasn't working. Sudafed, Dayquil, store generics, nothing was working. I had tissue shoved up my nostrils, which stopped the drip for as long as it took for them ot become saturated and then start dripping again.

After three days of suffering, I finally eyeballed the Nasonex that DrD had given me months ago and I had never used. I don't like to spray things up my nose, but with Mom and Katie on me to try it, I gave in. I couldn't snort as my nose was running and it came running back out, but some of it must have stuck, because about 3 minutes later, my sore throat went away and where I had rubbed my nose raw stopped hurting. The running stopped, but there was still a drip, if I bent forward.

So, now I snort.  ::)

Daniel's boss finally called and they had a contract for a job site west of Abilene. He was supposed to leave Saturday. Then Sunday. Then Tuesday. I had already maxed out my food card and Katie's food card. Now Katie started to chime in, "when are you leaving?" he got upset, like we were throwing him out. Got that cleared up, but still couldn't get a departure date out of him.

It has rained every day for the last week. Thunderstorms and tornado sightings.  My yard is green and my flowers are booming. Finally, Wednesday, we got Daniel packed up. He must have washed 7 loads of: something, because I only ever saw him wear one thing, which had a skull on the front, some wrestling thing, I hope. Waved bye- bye and an hour later he was knocking at the door.

He had forgotten his hard hat. I think I ate all my finger nails trying to keep from saying anything that could be: misconstrued. But, he is finally gone back to work.

Binder/Binder called and my case is in appeals with a judge, somewhere. The letter gave the same info that all previous letters had given: determination could take up to 45 days: or longer. I just glance at it now: after three years, I have become numbed to any promises from SSA.  

The boy's birthday was July 27 (Robert) and July 28 (Daniel/Dewayne) July31 would have been JW's birthday. and Mom's sn on Aug 18th. (I've already got her card.) It sings Happy 'Burp'Day
Katie thinks that it sounds like someone is sick. I said that they are burping as they sing.
Will probably have to find a more suitable card. (sigh)




"I'm not done yet"....Glen Campbell

"I may not be exactly where I want to be, but I sure as Hell am not where I was"
Wynnona Judd

Diagnosed/HIV
1993
AZT
Norvir
1994-2001
Crixivan/Epivir/Zerit
No Meds for 7 Years

04jul07/DVT-right leg/Bi Lateral PE's     
16oct08/DVT-left leg
Aug09 Diagnosed: COPD

05may2015
Un-detectable
Tcells 700
44%

Offline rondrond

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  • 22 years HIV+ yet a yard could be the death of me
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #952 on: August 05, 2009, 08:38:20 am »
Back in my day: there were 9 Planets......





Dennis,

You are not old....I am old. shhh...don't argue.  

I am waiting for the phone to ring: between 10-11am. Another phone interview to continue Food Stamps.

The sun is coming up. Boy, has it been humid. I have been having a time breathing: it's more like I'm panting. When getting my INR checked, the Dr asked if I had asthma..@.@

I've been taking the Zyrtec everyday. It just isn't helping anymore. I don't want to use the Nasonex too much as I found out that it has steroids in it. DrG stated that it would be ok that snorting it up the nose: it won't go in to my system?? I just looked at her: "Girl, everything I've ever snorted in my life has gone straight to my system: what are you talking about?"

So, she gave me a RX for Rhinocort and Allegra. I took my first dose last night and I'm sitting here with my sinuses just a'burnin: and my throat feels sore: I think I'm goin got have to go snort some Nasonex: why? cause it worked.

She stated that if the allergy meds didn't help my breathing, then she would schedule me to have my heart checked, especially since my ankles are swollen and hurt.  She had taken me off my water pill, Hydroclorth,  and now wants me to start it again at 2.5mg instead of 5mg.  

Then I got her to fill out a 9 page Multiple impairment Questionnaire for Binder/Binder and then faxed it to them. Then went to the Food Pantry and flirted, with Carl and Sean got some groceries. Found out that our AOC is merging with Tarrant County Aids Interfaith Network (there's a mouthful) and the will be moving to a new building in another part of town: so don't come here after this month, because the building will be empty.

Didn't know how I felt about that. They have been there since before my diagnosis. I just hate change. Hopefully, the services will be the same or improved. At least it's on a bus route, as the Apt Complex built for Aids Clients was across the street, and now they will have to take the bus. I've ridden the bus before, it's ok. Except for winter, when the wind is blowing, and it's icing: then it's not so ok.

Creatnine level in my liver is still too high. She will give it one more test before deciding on a med change.  I had been concerned that my last labs were going to be 'fornicated', due to my hospital stay and no meds for a week, plus the pneumonia.  They went down, but they went back up. Not to where they were before, but still not a downward trend.

I actually got excited for a shot bit, when at the doctors office. Why does their lighting show things you can't see at home? I looked down at my right leg, which had the DVT and is permanently swollen. Well, the hair on my leg: died.from the knee down: or went into hiding, but I actually saw some hairs and said "oh look, my hairs growing back." She disagreed, stating that it would not grow back. (every time we end our visits, she always asks, "is there anything else?" and I say" yes, I want my leg hair back"

She wanted to know why, and I said that it would hide all the ugliness........





« Last Edit: August 05, 2009, 08:40:56 am by rondrond »
"I'm not done yet"....Glen Campbell

"I may not be exactly where I want to be, but I sure as Hell am not where I was"
Wynnona Judd

Diagnosed/HIV
1993
AZT
Norvir
1994-2001
Crixivan/Epivir/Zerit
No Meds for 7 Years

04jul07/DVT-right leg/Bi Lateral PE's     
16oct08/DVT-left leg
Aug09 Diagnosed: COPD

05may2015
Un-detectable
Tcells 700
44%

Offline denb45

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  • "1987 Classic Old School POZ+"
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #953 on: August 05, 2009, 08:54:10 am »
OK Ronnie I won't argue ( you know I'm only 2 yrs younger than you Ronnie) ;D  Wow  your ID Doctor sounds a lot like mine, I'm falling apart faster than she can fix me, it's gotta be very frustrating for her, to even treat people as sick and old as I'am, she's only 25 yrs. old and I'm 53, the last time I saw her, I told her welcome to the world of Geriatrics patients with AIDS.......she didn't think that was so funny, but it's the truth ya know, I also told her to give-up-now, cause, the older I get the harder it's gonna be to even treat me, after I said that, she looked as if she wanted to run outta the room  ???
« Last Edit: August 05, 2009, 09:00:49 am by denb45 »
"it's so nice to be insane, cause no-one ask you to explain" Helen Reddy cc 1974

Offline rondrond

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  • Posts: 1,729
  • 22 years HIV+ yet a yard could be the death of me
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #954 on: August 13, 2009, 09:37:03 am »
Dennis: a cantankerous 'ol man? hmmph.. I don't believe it. I'll have to see that with my own eyes.


Well, there has been a family meeting, of sorts. Mom is thinking that this house is going to be the death of me and that we need to buy another house with less yard work: for me: and less walls: for Katie and my sanity. I cringe every time she attempts to go through a doorway and we might as well bring the walls in the hall on down.

I am supposed to be looking for what I want: and what we need, as I am the one living with this wheelchair, and understand what it does: *the Dalek..'destroy'...'destroy'....'ex-ter-min-ate'*

Since the seed has been planted, I have gone wandering around the property, looking at my accomplishments: and my failures. I don't have the energy to to do it anymore, yet am having a problem of 'letting go' or admitting defeat: drop your weapons, turn and flee the battle.

I'm not used to being told that I might just not be able to do something: that it is beyond me: to give up. Is this a part of aging : gracefully? Letting go of that you can no longer do?

Ok, so the property is too big for my health, and the chair is too big for the walls. I have made one half-hearted search online for handicapped accessible houses for sale in Fort Worth. I got a slew of them for Dallas: but the real estate agent states that she is handicapped and works the metroplex and understands the needs of the handicapped: so maybe. Everyone says that it is for my health and own good. When did I become an invalid in their eyes? Well, there was that week in the hospital with pneumonia, then the kidney stones, then a severe sinus infection, which, by the way, that Allegra will dry up a rock and turn it to dust. :-\

I'm out watering my newly planted grass, admiring my flowers, and the vine covered fences that have been tamed. I mowed the yard Tuesday evening and my neighbors all appeared, like some tribal call: the sound of a lawn mower signaling that someone is outside doing yardwork: join them. Both neighbors across the street came out and were doing hedges and watering as I mowed, then watered.

In a concerted effort (more from resignation) we all sweep the street and curbs from Neighbors three mammoth, ancient pine trees that have just gone through a seasonal shedding of pine needles, making a blanket over driveways, streets, cars...but, it could be worse:

I could have a butt hole for a neighbor: :o





Coming inside, I look around and cringe at the thought of moving. I'm certain when the time comes, I will find the right combination of muscle relaxers and pain killers to get it done. But, first things first: I've got to find the house of my dreams: that is till in my AOC service area, and Katie's medicaid doctor's list: and of course, not too far from Mom.  :D
« Last Edit: August 13, 2009, 09:53:36 am by rondrond »
"I'm not done yet"....Glen Campbell

"I may not be exactly where I want to be, but I sure as Hell am not where I was"
Wynnona Judd

Diagnosed/HIV
1993
AZT
Norvir
1994-2001
Crixivan/Epivir/Zerit
No Meds for 7 Years

04jul07/DVT-right leg/Bi Lateral PE's     
16oct08/DVT-left leg
Aug09 Diagnosed: COPD

05may2015
Un-detectable
Tcells 700
44%

Offline denb45

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  • "1987 Classic Old School POZ+"
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #955 on: August 13, 2009, 10:02:14 am »
Ronnie........would it be a lot cheaper, if you could somehow get your old place, walls and doorways wheelchair assessable? and maybe you could look into hiring a Gardener? I mean moving is a REAL BITCH , and I hope I never have to do that again, next time I move, I'll hire a Moving Company, if it's affordable to do so, if not, it's gonna be HELL, as Bob cannot move anything, and I have to do all the Grunt-Work, however he's great at packing up boxes  ???
« Last Edit: August 13, 2009, 10:06:15 am by denb45 »
"it's so nice to be insane, cause no-one ask you to explain" Helen Reddy cc 1974

Offline rondrond

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  • 22 years HIV+ yet a yard could be the death of me
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #956 on: August 13, 2009, 11:20:50 am »
Oh, Dennis, I just don't think I could take living through another remodel....the noise, the strangers, hot in summer, cold in winter, because the door is always open...

well I found two houses:



It's just down the road, so moving would be easier. ::)  and it's only a measley 5 million...wait, we could probably negotiate..Katie can use the servant's entrance...

 :(oh, very well:

another one down the road...well, it's still 5 milion.. ::)  oh yeah, there is the garden: yardwork.  :(

I'm going to...Mom?  MOm?  Well I don't know, she must have fainted... :D



I'll keep looking.....


"I'm not done yet"....Glen Campbell

"I may not be exactly where I want to be, but I sure as Hell am not where I was"
Wynnona Judd

Diagnosed/HIV
1993
AZT
Norvir
1994-2001
Crixivan/Epivir/Zerit
No Meds for 7 Years

04jul07/DVT-right leg/Bi Lateral PE's     
16oct08/DVT-left leg
Aug09 Diagnosed: COPD

05may2015
Un-detectable
Tcells 700
44%

Offline denb45

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  • Posts: 5,048
  • "1987 Classic Old School POZ+"
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #957 on: August 13, 2009, 11:42:30 am »
Ronnie.....if you buy that 5 million dollar one down the street, I'll move in with you and your sister, I'll do all of the cooking, cleaning, yard work, and driving you both around....I'd do this FOR NOTHING just for a chance to live in 5 million dollar mansion, you would never have to lift a finger, to do ANYTHING for the rest of your life, as long as you left it all to me when you die...LOL  ;D
« Last Edit: August 13, 2009, 11:47:04 am by denb45 »
"it's so nice to be insane, cause no-one ask you to explain" Helen Reddy cc 1974

Offline rondrond

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  • 22 years HIV+ yet a yard could be the death of me
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #958 on: August 28, 2009, 11:23:38 am »
^.^ Dennis, it's a deal. UNfortunately, Mom has quoted me a figure that is considerably smaller than what I was looking at.  :-\   I still haven't found anything. We know that it is going to be difficult to find what we want: but at my stage in life, might as well do it right.

A Fixer-Upper:




I have not been doing well for the past couple of weeks. My sinuses have been outrageous and though the Allegra is working, it gives me a headache: which is a small price to pay to stop Niagara Falls.

I crossed over into another world for awhile. Not sure I have completely come back. Katie's Home Health Aide, Myra, who is absolutely wonderful and Katie loves to death, came in one morning all down in the mouth. Her mother is in the hospital. Her mother is over the services that Katie receives at home, and she and I have become thicker than thieves.

Her name is Frankie, and she was just in my living room, a week ago, laughing, asking my advice on how to please her husband: or how to get him to please her.. ::) and we were just having a grand day of camping.

Two days later, she was in the hospital, and as Myra was explaining why, I could feel a vortex opening and pulling me in. Frankie had had a blood clot, that gave her a heart attack and went to her brain, giving her a stroke: she doesn't even know who she is. I totally freaked out.

I have lost all my friends to Aids and now, when I start to make new friends, they are leaving because of blood clots? Once again, I am the survivor and asking "Why not me?"

I was already having sleeping issues, and became terrified to go to sleep: not because I was afraid that I wouldn't wake up, as before: but now that I would wake up, and not know who I was.

The DR states that there is a possibility that she could come out of it, that it could only be temporary.I have been visiting her, and it is so heartbreaking to see this woman, cowering in her bed, wondering who all these people are, and just a week before, I was talking and laughing with her.

So, Mom, decides to take my mind off things, and takes me to buy new tires for my truck. Then, I started going to Physical Therapy for my back/hip pain. Yesterday was my first session, and I left, hurting more, than when I went in. :-\ Checking out and getting my next appointment, I was leaning, all over the counter:

Receptionist: "are you all right?"
Me: "She hurt me"




« Last Edit: August 28, 2009, 11:29:13 am by rondrond »
"I'm not done yet"....Glen Campbell

"I may not be exactly where I want to be, but I sure as Hell am not where I was"
Wynnona Judd

Diagnosed/HIV
1993
AZT
Norvir
1994-2001
Crixivan/Epivir/Zerit
No Meds for 7 Years

04jul07/DVT-right leg/Bi Lateral PE's     
16oct08/DVT-left leg
Aug09 Diagnosed: COPD

05may2015
Un-detectable
Tcells 700
44%

Offline Jeff G

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Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #959 on: August 28, 2009, 11:31:53 am »
I'm sorry about your friend Ron . Some time what life gives us is so hard to except .
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Offline aztecan

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  • 36 years positive, 64 years a pain in the butt
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #960 on: September 01, 2009, 11:20:33 pm »
Ron, I'm sorry to hear about your friend.
It seems to be a fact of life we cannot escape.

Hang in there.;

HUGS,

Mark

"May your life preach more loudly than your lips."
~ William Ellery Channing (Unitarian Minister)

Offline aztecan

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  • Posts: 5,530
  • 36 years positive, 64 years a pain in the butt
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #961 on: September 01, 2009, 11:22:52 pm »
On a somewhat lighter note, I thought I would help you look for homes.

Here are some that may be within your price range and would definitely be a steal - albeit they do seem to all need just a smidge of TLC.



[attachment deleted by admin]
"May your life preach more loudly than your lips."
~ William Ellery Channing (Unitarian Minister)

Offline aztecan

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  • 36 years positive, 64 years a pain in the butt
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #962 on: September 01, 2009, 11:23:54 pm »
I think they may need a bit of elbow grease indoors as well.



[attachment deleted by admin]
"May your life preach more loudly than your lips."
~ William Ellery Channing (Unitarian Minister)

Offline rondrond

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  • Posts: 1,729
  • 22 years HIV+ yet a yard could be the death of me
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #963 on: September 02, 2009, 01:28:52 am »
^.^ Suddenly, I feel like Goldie Hawn in 'Overboard'  ::)  ...and I could clean those up and make them very presentable: I just don't want to: unless I have Patrick Swayze bringing home the bacon. :D

At home....like the Armadillo...



I reported to Jury Duty on Monday: 8am. Parked free in the Stockyards and public transportation 'The 'T'  will give a free ride if you show your jury summons. The place was packed: standing room only: I got there early enough to have a chair instead of some floor space. The judge was rounding us up in groups of 60.

A young man, kind of tall, dark hair styled like Carey Elwes in ' The Princess Bride' Stated that he was a self employed dance instructor. After a few moments, we were chatting : well, i was chatting away, as I tend to do when I'm bored, and he got involved and I got him to slip up and come out to me.  :D

Then I asked which club he was dancing for: of if he was really an instructor: which drag show? He laughed....but, never answered. Then he went to the bathroom, and returning and taking his seat, I looked over and he had pulled his hair straight back into a pony tail: only his hair was too short, so he looked like Jack Nicholson in the 'The Witches of Eastwick"  ::)

Four hours later, he got called, and I was left to my own devices: I had brought a book. Glory Be: I had had the foresight to take a pain pill and an Allegra with my AM meds. As she was calling names for the third group, there was a change to her spiel. These people were to report back in the morning on the next day. Everyone groaned, myself included, as now, every group after that was scheduled was for the next day.  

Five hours later, after I had sought every sitting position imaginable in a chair and using the back of the chair in front of me:  the judge stated that this was last call. She called forth a group, stating that they would be the reserve group.

Everyone that was left, including me started to cheer, when she called us up and said that we were the second reserve group. @.@ I finally got to go home at 3pm. I got home and Myra was still cleaning, and she was singing. Her good mood?....

Frankie, her mother, started recognizing family members. She is coming out of the stroke.
I cannot express my feelings on hearing this: except for gratitude.





« Last Edit: September 02, 2009, 01:31:04 am by rondrond »
"I'm not done yet"....Glen Campbell

"I may not be exactly where I want to be, but I sure as Hell am not where I was"
Wynnona Judd

Diagnosed/HIV
1993
AZT
Norvir
1994-2001
Crixivan/Epivir/Zerit
No Meds for 7 Years

04jul07/DVT-right leg/Bi Lateral PE's     
16oct08/DVT-left leg
Aug09 Diagnosed: COPD

05may2015
Un-detectable
Tcells 700
44%

Offline AndyArrow

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Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #964 on: September 04, 2009, 02:45:23 am »
Sounds like some good news all around ... something we certainly need around here!!
It is not the arrival that matters.  It is the journey along the way. -- Michel Montaigne

Offline rondrond

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  • 22 years HIV+ yet a yard could be the death of me
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #965 on: September 05, 2009, 09:47:02 am »
...911...please state the nature of your emergency......




Last Saturday. I was sawing a fallen tree in the back. It was leaning across into another tree on neighbors side and was completely covered in Trumpet Vines ands it's red flowers that the Humming birds love so much.

I had put my left hand above me to steady the thing as I sawed, when I felt an intense burning on my arm . I looked and all I could see were the flowers. I've been stung by ants before, and after the intital stinging calmed, I ignored it.  The only activity to the site that showed there had been a bite was this crusty little mountain which would appear: I just flicked it off.

I had forgotten about it, until Tuesday, when I noticed a white bump. Not having the capability to leave a bump alone, I mashed it: it bled, and bled, and bled. Then it started to hurt and my arm started to hurt from the elbow to the wrist. I had a scheduled appointment with DRD on Friday, so I made a mental note to show it to her,

As if I was going to forget about it: my arm and wrist started to swell and turn red. I hydrogen peroxided it: rubbing alcohol, and neosporin. It started to look like a miniature relief of a mountain range, then these white blisters appeared: which I did not pop: though I really, really wanted to.

By Friday morning it was throbbing and I showed up at at the DR office early: to get the results of my labwork and to show her my new boo-boo. She diagnosed it as shingles. @.@ and cellulitis from a secondary infection. Apparently any trauma to the body can trigger the reaction, especially since I've already had shingles three times. She took a culture to send off to the lab to see if I did have herpes on my arm. ::)

So, I got Bactrim, Acloyvir, Tramadol and put mowing the front yard on hold. This morning, my hand had joined the swelling, so currently have an ice pack ace bandaged to my hand, promising Mom that I would go to the ER if it did not go down.

I am not happy.

I am happy with my lab results. CD 533 33% VL<48

DRD is not happy that the creatnine levels continue to go on an upward trend.


« Last Edit: September 05, 2009, 09:50:24 am by rondrond »
"I'm not done yet"....Glen Campbell

"I may not be exactly where I want to be, but I sure as Hell am not where I was"
Wynnona Judd

Diagnosed/HIV
1993
AZT
Norvir
1994-2001
Crixivan/Epivir/Zerit
No Meds for 7 Years

04jul07/DVT-right leg/Bi Lateral PE's     
16oct08/DVT-left leg
Aug09 Diagnosed: COPD

05may2015
Un-detectable
Tcells 700
44%

Offline AndyArrow

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  • Posts: 1,197
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #966 on: September 09, 2009, 10:05:06 pm »
Ouch!!!!

I hope you get some relief soon.  My shingles are almost cleared up and the pain is long gone so I am full of empathy for you.  I'd kiss it to make it feel better but your description of it was GROSS!!!!  :-X

Hugs!
AA
It is not the arrival that matters.  It is the journey along the way. -- Michel Montaigne

Offline rondrond

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  • 22 years HIV+ yet a yard could be the death of me
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #967 on: September 12, 2009, 04:32:48 am »

lend-me-your-ear...




I got no relief. My symptoms worsened over the weekend. Katie wouldn't leave me alone in my denial that something was wrong. My hand/arm/ were red. The wound on my wrist was a blackened circle of dead flesh and full of icky, gooey, liquid tan soup. The whole apparatus throbbed and progressed to this 'ol leftie reverting to the the barbaric use of the right arm/hand. I did not want another hospital stay. I was trying everything and saying anything to avoid going to the hospital.

Katie handed me the phone on Tuesday afternoon " It's Mom"
mom:" get dressed. I'll be there in 20 minutes...end of discussion"

I was madder than an old wet hen. So, I was admitted, and placed on IV antibiotics and morphene, and vicadent, and just as I was starting to think that I was 'cured' DRL is standing at bedside surrounded by nurses in training and these 'words' are falling from his mouth to my ears: "needs to be lanced and drained for healing to occur"

I pointed to my roommates bed stating that they must have the wrong bed. They didn't. I got: excited: so was given two shots of morphene and two vicadent to calm me. As he unwrapped my wound, I could only stare in disbelief that I was going to be awake for what I just knew was not going to be anywhere near what I would even loosely define as a good time.

He deadened the area: juat like the dentist does, and that hurt, so I got another shot of morphene: and the almost crapped my pants when I saw the scalpel in his hand. Obviously, I survived.

I now had a gaping, raw, red hole on my wrist, which he took what appeared to be giant dental floss, stating that he was now going to 'pack it' ..@.@

The thread is treated with antibiotics and they take these clips and push it into the wound: packing it as tight as they can. I thought I was going to die: again.

6 hours later, with more morphene, vicadent, and two antibiotic drips, it actually stopped throbbing. The swelling and redness are still there, but the throbbing has stopped. I did not have the energy to keep up my defenses, so I allowed myself to think that the worse was over, and it would be downhill from there.

Well, the next morning, there was DrL at my bedside, looking suspicious again. These horrible, nightmarish words were falling from his lips. The packing needed to be repeated: everyday, until the wound healed from the bottom up. I looked around for fiery pits and demons with pitchforks. I must have passed on and gone to Hell.

Two more shots of morphene and two more vicadent managed to shut me up. He grabbed a little tail (the tip end of the thread) and started to pull it out. I had truly gone to Hell....and the Devil's true persona is that of a doctor. Then, He packed it again. It hurt even worse than the day before. I was considering amputation.

After 5 hours and more drugs, the pain subsided, but I did would not let myself be fooled into any false sense of security and trust. Friday: He stated that I could go home. They would schedule a visiting nurse to come out and pack my wound: that the worst of it should be over. I don't think so, but, then, I am in Hell, what else could I expect?

Mom wants me to call her when the nurse calls to say she is on the way. Mom...that little bugger. She sat there and watched all this without even flinching: she found the whole thing fascinating: and wants to be there when the nurse does it at home.

« Last Edit: September 12, 2009, 04:34:19 am by rondrond »
"I'm not done yet"....Glen Campbell

"I may not be exactly where I want to be, but I sure as Hell am not where I was"
Wynnona Judd

Diagnosed/HIV
1993
AZT
Norvir
1994-2001
Crixivan/Epivir/Zerit
No Meds for 7 Years

04jul07/DVT-right leg/Bi Lateral PE's     
16oct08/DVT-left leg
Aug09 Diagnosed: COPD

05may2015
Un-detectable
Tcells 700
44%

Offline bear60

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  • Posts: 4,105
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #968 on: September 12, 2009, 08:12:46 am »
Oh Ron
I am sending you a big hug. Its not enough to have HIV but to have to go thru all this other stuff must be hard to take.
Hang in there big guy.

Joel
Poz Bear Type in Philadelphia

Offline denb45

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  • "1987 Classic Old School POZ+"
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #969 on: September 12, 2009, 10:21:27 am »
Oh My Ronnie, I'm wishing you a very speedy recovery, you'll be up and at em' in no time flat, I just know you will, being sick & in the hospital is NO FUN AT ALL. get well soon soon hon  :-*
"it's so nice to be insane, cause no-one ask you to explain" Helen Reddy cc 1974

Offline Snowangel

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Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #970 on: September 12, 2009, 04:32:16 pm »
I am glad you survived! That sounded awful.  Doesn't it hurt to type?

Your Mom sounds like a wonderful and strong women!
Of all the things you wear, your expression is the most important

The heaviest thing you can carry is a grudge..

One thing you can give and still keep...is your word.

One thing you can't recycle is wasted time.

Offline AndyArrow

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Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #971 on: September 14, 2009, 04:13:38 am »
Ron,

I'm so sorry it didn't heal and you are having to go through all this.  I completely understand the packing bit because that's what I'm having to do with the cavity in my partners chest (except rather than that floss stuff I use gauze that I have wet with "Wound Wash" using a really long Qtip type thing and then cover with dry gauze & tape.  All the time wearing latex gloves, I make a real cute nurse.  :D  Too bad you don't live up here I could do you both at the same time!  ::)

Hugs!!!
AA 
It is not the arrival that matters.  It is the journey along the way. -- Michel Montaigne

Offline aztecan

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  • 36 years positive, 64 years a pain in the butt
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #972 on: September 14, 2009, 09:48:59 am »
Ron, you know I'm not one to kvetch,

BUT . . .

You had what sounded like an infected abscess in your wrist. Those are not only painful, but potentially dangerous.

You take care of that arm and do what the nurse tells you.  >:(

Just think of this post as your having two mothers - temporarily.  ;)

HUGS,

Mark
"May your life preach more loudly than your lips."
~ William Ellery Channing (Unitarian Minister)

Offline rondrond

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  • 22 years HIV+ yet a yard could be the death of me
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #973 on: September 15, 2009, 12:41:25 pm »

all-about-cats....



Suddenly: I'm having to do homework again. I was contacted by MASH: an advocacy program at the hospital that is trying to get my hospital stays paid for by Medcaid/Medcare. She asked why I had not applied for SSI.

Sometimes, one simple statement, made in the midst of chaos, will center you. I now had something to do than lick my wounds. Apparently. I was never told: I was told but was on morphene and in too much pain to listen: or I was being discharged and could only think of getting out of there and going home: but, once your assets drop below the two thousand mark, you are supposed to notify them, as you are now eligible to apply for SSI... @.@

So, I've been calling and making all these follow up appointments that were put on my discharge papers, and hopefully will have at least got a request date, starting today.

I am glad you survived! That sounded awful.  Doesn't it hurt to type?

Your Mom sounds like a wonderful and strong women!

Thanks Snow. Yes. I must have one of the most wonderful Mothers on the Planet. I am typing with my right hand. like a piano, and this key, which is
my-best-friend:

Joel, Dennis,  :-* :-*

Andy....Ouchieeee....I can only wish you were my nurse. Fortunately, the visiting nurse they sent is a male. early 20's and cute as a button. He has a wedding ring on, though.  :-\  The story of my life.

Mark...hmm... I've been kvetched. :D  The cultures have shown that there is no more infection in my blood and they have determined that it was a spider bite: Brown Recluse.

"I'm not done yet"....Glen Campbell

"I may not be exactly where I want to be, but I sure as Hell am not where I was"
Wynnona Judd

Diagnosed/HIV
1993
AZT
Norvir
1994-2001
Crixivan/Epivir/Zerit
No Meds for 7 Years

04jul07/DVT-right leg/Bi Lateral PE's     
16oct08/DVT-left leg
Aug09 Diagnosed: COPD

05may2015
Un-detectable
Tcells 700
44%

Offline rondrond

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  • 22 years HIV+ yet a yard could be the death of me
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #974 on: September 17, 2009, 12:55:44 pm »

Building Bridges....



My little sister: Barbie Doll, Cheerleader, blonde w/gray eyes, Terry, has started to open up to me and share some of what she went through when she lost her right breast to cancer. She has always avoided the topic before: but responded to my posting of my last hospital stay:

"Any time I go to a Dr’s office the pit of my stomach is churning and I try anything to get my mind off of what is going on around me. I call them the torture chambers.  You can walk in feeling that you are on top of the world (been exercising, eating right ….. feeling great). Then wham  within 1 day they have removed a breast, dug out your arm pits, reconstructed your missing breast with a flap of tissue and muscle they got from below you bikini line that they tunneled under your chest wall.
     After over 18 major surgeries  you start getting wise to their tricks.  I now ask for something to relieve anxiety before I walk into their hallowed halls. And if they ask you if you feel any pain ( even if I am floating up to the tiles in the ceiling) I tell them “YES!!!”.  While in the hospital if the Dr. is coming to see me after his initial assault on my  body I ask when he is suppose to come in to see me. If I am due for my next pain medication I will hold off taking it to make sure I take it about half an hour before he comes in.  I know that I got them when I hear them remarking to each other,  “None of the other patients were able to take it as good as I did”.
  When I had my Sinus’s roto-rootered  they had to pack (stuffed to the max) long strips of gauze into my sinus cavities in order to stop the bleeding. When I was finally able to go to the bathroom (without throwing up ) I was shocked to see how big my nostrils where. Like your dental floss it makes your toes curl up like the wicked witch of the east when they slowly peel it away and your body has tried to attach itself to it."[ /i]

...and I thought I had problems..... :-\

You are supposed to get back on a horse if you get thrown: so I m still gardening:

...have no idea what these are, but they are all over one of the fences in the backyard:







..and the red spider lilies came out for all the rain we have been having:






This afternoon, I have an appointment with DRD as all the blood tests that were run while hospitalized have shown that my creatnine level has reached critical 1.5....We are going to discuss a med change, which is somewhat worrisome to me as I have no idea what to change to:  darn kidneys.




"I'm not done yet"....Glen Campbell

"I may not be exactly where I want to be, but I sure as Hell am not where I was"
Wynnona Judd

Diagnosed/HIV
1993
AZT
Norvir
1994-2001
Crixivan/Epivir/Zerit
No Meds for 7 Years

04jul07/DVT-right leg/Bi Lateral PE's     
16oct08/DVT-left leg
Aug09 Diagnosed: COPD

05may2015
Un-detectable
Tcells 700
44%

Offline AndyArrow

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  • Posts: 1,197
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #975 on: September 17, 2009, 04:40:06 pm »
Sounds like your little sister has been through the wringer.  I guess most of us have a love/hate relationship with our doctors.
It is not the arrival that matters.  It is the journey along the way. -- Michel Montaigne

Offline rondrond

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  • Posts: 1,729
  • 22 years HIV+ yet a yard could be the death of me
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #976 on: September 19, 2009, 01:30:58 pm »
I totally agree Andy. At the moment, I have too many doctors involved with my life and health and I am really working it trying to be the 'go between' and keeping one informed of just what the others are saying and doing:

"clowns to the right of me,
jokers to the left,
Here I am,
stuck in the middle with you"



I saw DRC, on Thursday to dsicuss the hospital findings on my creatnine level. She just smirked: stating that they always point to HIV meds first, before looking at the big picture.

In April, my creatnine level was at 2.95, which was when she stopped the Epzicom and broke it down to Epivir and Ziagen so she could reduce the dosage of Ziagen: and, according to her, I am showing improvement, from 2.95 to 1.5. Though it is still high, there is an improvement. Also, the Gemfribozal, and Neurontin can also affect the kidneys, and so she cut my doses of these two meds in half: which, I'm not too certain about:

wake up, sleepy toes...



My neuropathy has increased with the decreased dosage. I was hoping that the Tramadol would step in and take the place of the missing neurontin: maybe it is in an adjustment phase: but at the moment: I don't like it.

My blood pressure has been low in my last couple of visits. My cholesterol, and lipids are outrageously high and I just don't understand it. I am doing right, exercising, and following the dietician's guidelines and still there is no improvement. My weight keeps going up and then down and then up again.

I am really tired of hearing: "do you want to schedule with the dietician?"  "WHY?"  I have already seen three, they each say something different, and it just seems that no matter what I do, nothing is working. I should probably sign up for Meals on Wheels from the hospital cafeteria. Maybe then, they will shut up about it: I'm tired of them not believing me.

...and my feet/toes hurt..I need to get away..


« Last Edit: September 19, 2009, 01:40:53 pm by rondrond »
"I'm not done yet"....Glen Campbell

"I may not be exactly where I want to be, but I sure as Hell am not where I was"
Wynnona Judd

Diagnosed/HIV
1993
AZT
Norvir
1994-2001
Crixivan/Epivir/Zerit
No Meds for 7 Years

04jul07/DVT-right leg/Bi Lateral PE's     
16oct08/DVT-left leg
Aug09 Diagnosed: COPD

05may2015
Un-detectable
Tcells 700
44%

Offline AlanBama

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  • Posts: 3,670
  • Alabama: the 'other' 3rd World Country!
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #977 on: September 23, 2009, 02:00:07 pm »
Ron, sending you big hugs honey....you've really had a time lately.

Hope it all begins to get better.   How's the wrist healing now?   Sounds like a nasty spider bite....my friend got bitten by one a few weeks ago, took a lot of meds to clear it up.....

I've decided that Alabama mosquitos really want AIDS.   Every time I try to sit on the porch, they attack me.   They make the biggest whelps on me when they bite....I have given up trying to enjoy the outdoors.   Just can't do it anymore....

HUGS -- Alan   :-*
"Remember my sentimental friend that a heart is not judged by how much you love, but by how much you are loved by others." - The Wizard of Oz

Offline rondrond

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  • 22 years HIV+ yet a yard could be the death of me
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #978 on: September 25, 2009, 04:32:28 am »
Thanks for the hug, Alan:

Here's one for you: (HuG)

busy as a bee..



My wrist is still draining, but not as much as last week. The hole was 1 3/4" deep and now is 1" deep: so it is healing. I saw DrG on Thursday and, disagreeing with DrD, she change the halved meds back to their original dosage.

She thinks that the bactrum is the main culprit and after my last dose of antibiotics, tomorrow, my creatnine levels and cholesterol should return to normal: or close enough to it. She states that as long as I am on antibiotics that she cannot get a true lab result.

I don't know: I'm not a doctor: but I am glad for the neurontin: it was getting to where I couldn't walk. My big toes were shooting out with jolts of pain and the top of my feet were having waves of sharp tingles run across them. The Tramadol is not strong enough to conquer the pain of neuropathy and I do not want to get hooked on hydrocodone: even though it does work.

I keep asking if I can mow the yard as I have been forbidden to mow the yard. I asked the visiting nurse how much longer and he stated that it would be three weeks at least. I still don't understand why I can't mow the yard. It is wrapped in gauze, and I could even wrap it with an ace bandage, to boot, but they insist: NO. *harummph*

I go to have my INR checked tomorrow and it will be 'off' because antibiotics and coumadin, don't party well together. I'll have to make sure that they have faxed the pharmacy, as I was turning a new Rx for Tramadol and already had turned one in for Coumadin, but the three month program requires a week to fill: for some reason, known only to the pharmacists.

He wasn't going to refill it stating that it wasn't due until Oct 3. I tried to explain that I was on 2.5 mgs M/W/F and 5 mgs Tu/Wed/THurs/Sat/Sun so I had to take 2 of the 2.5's which made the bottle empty, pretty darn quick. Well the instructions on the label don't show what the doctor stated to me: only showing 2.5mgs daily.
After trying to explain about the latest hospital stay and the antibiotics and the DR changing the dosages to fit my INR level, which keeps changing every week....I finally just blurted... "call them"

He stated that they weren't allowed to call ?? but could fax them....so I said "then... Fax them" and I had to walk away from the sheer stupidity of the whole situation: and I thought that my head was going to explode.

Frankie. who had the stroke from the blood clot, is now at home and was actually cooking in the kitchen, so she is recovering from her stroke, very well.
"I'm not done yet"....Glen Campbell

"I may not be exactly where I want to be, but I sure as Hell am not where I was"
Wynnona Judd

Diagnosed/HIV
1993
AZT
Norvir
1994-2001
Crixivan/Epivir/Zerit
No Meds for 7 Years

04jul07/DVT-right leg/Bi Lateral PE's     
16oct08/DVT-left leg
Aug09 Diagnosed: COPD

05may2015
Un-detectable
Tcells 700
44%

Offline rondrond

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  • 22 years HIV+ yet a yard could be the death of me
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #979 on: October 01, 2009, 01:59:58 pm »


...3 Tarsiers....



My wound has stopped draining and is filling from the bottom up. NO aliens or baby spiders have issued forth, so I guess I won't be Spider Kingdom's Halloween Roast Beast for their feasting pleasure...(sighs of disappointment from the spider world)

It gives off a sharp bolt of pain now and then, as though some nerves are trying to reconnect. I have avoided the Hydrocodone for a week and am only taking the Tramadol: life is tolerable.

Daniel came to town, in between jobs and has mowed the front yard. I worked his nerves as I was 'hovering' pointing out that he was trying to run over my flowers: "those are flowers"

But, what goes round comes round, he's working my best nerve. He has a new girlfriend and she had been here now with him every day, sleeping over, eating, using my bathroom. I have a holder that holds 5 rolls of TP that last me for a year. It is empty, gone in a week  >:(

They are like two dogs, as wherever Daniel goes, there goes Lindsey. He was only supposed to be here for three days, and that was a week ago. His phone keeps going off as Lindsey had a child, and her mother keeps calling....and they don't answer...If I was her, I would have driven the town, on the hunt, until I found them....just saying. I love my nephew...but love tarnishes, now and then...

So as far as I know, my app for SSI has been submitted, but I haven't heard anything ...is this going to be another SSDI situation? (I'm waiting to hear, if I I'm on a waiting list, for waiting.....)

This is the month for Gay Pride in Fort Worth....I already have two dates from the Food Bank...totally unexpected. haven't said yes, but the silent no, should cover it: I'm not ready for it: I'm ugly.


"I'm not done yet"....Glen Campbell

"I may not be exactly where I want to be, but I sure as Hell am not where I was"
Wynnona Judd

Diagnosed/HIV
1993
AZT
Norvir
1994-2001
Crixivan/Epivir/Zerit
No Meds for 7 Years

04jul07/DVT-right leg/Bi Lateral PE's     
16oct08/DVT-left leg
Aug09 Diagnosed: COPD

05may2015
Un-detectable
Tcells 700
44%

Offline denb45

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  • "1987 Classic Old School POZ+"
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #980 on: October 01, 2009, 02:11:12 pm »
Well let's hope your nephew Daniel hasn't taken up permanent residency , that wouldn't be a good thing for you and kattie  :o , glad your on the mend ronnie  ;D, and NO your not ugly  ;D
"it's so nice to be insane, cause no-one ask you to explain" Helen Reddy cc 1974

Offline rondrond

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  • Posts: 1,729
  • 22 years HIV+ yet a yard could be the death of me
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #981 on: October 01, 2009, 02:17:23 pm »
 ;D Daniel knows better than to try and take up residency. It has already become an established fact, from once he moved out: the first time: that when Uncle Ronnie starts acting: weird: it's time to go.

The older I get, the more scars I seem to be accumulating. I wonder if a tattoo works over scars?
"I'm not done yet"....Glen Campbell

"I may not be exactly where I want to be, but I sure as Hell am not where I was"
Wynnona Judd

Diagnosed/HIV
1993
AZT
Norvir
1994-2001
Crixivan/Epivir/Zerit
No Meds for 7 Years

04jul07/DVT-right leg/Bi Lateral PE's     
16oct08/DVT-left leg
Aug09 Diagnosed: COPD

05may2015
Un-detectable
Tcells 700
44%

Offline bear60

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  • Posts: 4,105
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #982 on: October 01, 2009, 04:42:43 pm »
I'm glad you are feeling better Ron. You sound like your old bitchy self.  Hugs.
Poz Bear Type in Philadelphia

Offline rondrond

  • Member
  • Posts: 1,729
  • 22 years HIV+ yet a yard could be the death of me
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #983 on: October 02, 2009, 02:51:52 am »
Hey Joel ((HUG)

...just cashing in my stamp book when it gets full  ::)

It must have worked. I not only got my yard mowed, but my truck washed and waxed, and a cooked dinner that I did not even have to go get my plate: curbside service!








"I'm not done yet"....Glen Campbell

"I may not be exactly where I want to be, but I sure as Hell am not where I was"
Wynnona Judd

Diagnosed/HIV
1993
AZT
Norvir
1994-2001
Crixivan/Epivir/Zerit
No Meds for 7 Years

04jul07/DVT-right leg/Bi Lateral PE's     
16oct08/DVT-left leg
Aug09 Diagnosed: COPD

05may2015
Un-detectable
Tcells 700
44%

Offline AndyArrow

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  • Posts: 1,197
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #984 on: October 03, 2009, 05:19:46 pm »
Ron,

I'm so glad to hear that you wound is filling.  My partners is taking a little longer because it goes all the way down the breast bone (you can actually see part of the wire they used to hold the bone together) so sides have to fill in to cover it but then they said it should heal quickly once that happens.

Hugs & Smooches to make it feel better!  :-*
AA


It is not the arrival that matters.  It is the journey along the way. -- Michel Montaigne

Offline rondrond

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  • 22 years HIV+ yet a yard could be the death of me
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #985 on: October 08, 2009, 05:13:28 am »
Oh, Andy, You are a stronger person than me. I can't even cut Katie's toe nails. I'm afraid of cutting them too close and hurting her. But, I guess, we do what we have to, in the end.


purple cat...




I still have a visiting nurse packing my wound. It is now 3/4" across and 1/2" deep. It doesn't hurt all the time: just when I turn it to whatever it thinks is the wrong way. I'm still forbidden to mow the yard.

Daniel is supposed to to to a job site in Oklahoma this coming Monday. He and Lindsey are an item now and he stays here, and she stays at her parents, so they mostly stay here and her nesting instincts are turned on and I am turning into a sentinel, especially in the kitchen.

She will make something for Daniel to eat, and then rearrange the cabinets. I have to sit there and  "uh-uh..that goes down there...and so does that. I know there is a lot of space up there, but you have to remember that there is a wheelchair bound individual living here, and she has to be able to reach things, for those times like when I get admitted to the hospital."
                                                  *Is it Monday, yet?*

The upside is, she is going to college and is a definite upgrade from what Daniel usually dates. Daniel has finally agreed to have a DNA test done to see if he is paying child support for two boys that Charlotte says are his. Katie and I have bitten nailsl from the first time she got pregnant: it didn't add up, no matter which calendar you used. I'm certain that Lindsey had an influence in this decision as she and Charlotte used to be bff.  ::)

Life continues to change. Myra is now going to college, so she comes later in the day: like school has let out.  She has a 5 year old, 'J' , who I have allowed her to bring with her. He sits with me in the living room and we watch 'Spongebob Squarepants' or 'ICarly'...he can sing both theme songs: perfectly: I am getting there. I don't know what will happen after she graduates: interviews for another Home Health Aide.

I did not go to Gay Pride Parade on the 4th, but the Picnic is on the 10th at Trinity Park, which is just down the road, so I might make an appearance: at least get a hot dog. For some reason, I only like hot doge from Sonic Drive in, or if they are at a cookout.  It continues to rain at least once a day, so I hope it doesn't get rained out.

I got a haircut today and I've managed to do some exercises so I should be 'beautiful' by this Saturday. I've been thinking that I could buy some leather arm guards to cover the scars/wounds on my arms.



 I don't think they will tattoo over a scar, or I'd be looking for something exotic to try and hide the scars. I would wear long sleeves, but I can't stand long sleeves. I am constantly pulling on them as I feel so  'constrained'





« Last Edit: October 08, 2009, 05:17:18 am by rondrond »
"I'm not done yet"....Glen Campbell

"I may not be exactly where I want to be, but I sure as Hell am not where I was"
Wynnona Judd

Diagnosed/HIV
1993
AZT
Norvir
1994-2001
Crixivan/Epivir/Zerit
No Meds for 7 Years

04jul07/DVT-right leg/Bi Lateral PE's     
16oct08/DVT-left leg
Aug09 Diagnosed: COPD

05may2015
Un-detectable
Tcells 700
44%

Offline rondrond

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  • 22 years HIV+ yet a yard could be the death of me
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #986 on: October 17, 2009, 03:56:44 am »

cat-and-bowl




I did not make it to the Gay Pride Water Ballet Picnic...it rained. The sun finally came out ...today, as I was driving to JPS to  get my INR checked. Since the spider bite, the antibiotics have wreaked havoc with Coumadin (they do not mix) and my INR has been too low. Therapeutic Range is 2.0-3.0  I have been 1.6,  then 1.4 today. It went down.... unbelievable.

I was dressed for the weather, cold wind, cloudy: so no sandals or shorts. I ugghed and grunted and put on long pants and a long sleeve sweater and shoes: with socks. I was miserable. Became even more miserable when the sun came out and it warmed up: called sweating.

My wound has healed to the point of not needing to be packed anymore, just wrapped. If I turn it, like you're using a key in a lock, I get a shock of numbness in my thumb and first finger. Apparently, I was lucky. There were some other spider bite victims and they had gaping wounds that covered extremely large areas: like one was from wrist almost to the elbow: it looked like someone had taken a knife and sliced down the arm and pulled it open.: spider venom should be considered as a weapon.: and it probably has been used, I just never heard of it.

I had an appt with DrG on Thursday to discuss my lipids/liver. She called me that morning: she was calling in sick... o.o So I have to be rescheduled. I want to blame my poor kidney functioning on my low INR, but the Comadin Clinic pooh-poohed that idea. Then I brought up that there are some people in this world whose bodies reject being poisoned the Coumadin. They pooh-poohed that too. I  know why: the alternative to Coumadin is Heparin and Lovenox, and at $1200,00 a shot, NO they really weren't considering it at this time.

I have a feeling that if I ever get on SSI/SSDI and Medicaid, they will probably start throwing treatment options at me I could only think of from watching the ScyFy Channel. (they changed their name from SciFi: I don't get it)

After my appt this morning, I drove to Benbrook and visited Mom. She had a crick in her neck the other day, and it has gotten worse: to the point where she couldn't turn her neck. She goes to these workouts at a 'Curves' gym and I think she has hurt herself on one of the machines. She doesn't think so. believing that she just slept the wrong way.

I told her that I would be most happy to drive her to the ER..(payback)

Isn't that the way life goes? You get the youth all patched up, and then the seniors spring a leak.

"I'm not done yet"....Glen Campbell

"I may not be exactly where I want to be, but I sure as Hell am not where I was"
Wynnona Judd

Diagnosed/HIV
1993
AZT
Norvir
1994-2001
Crixivan/Epivir/Zerit
No Meds for 7 Years

04jul07/DVT-right leg/Bi Lateral PE's     
16oct08/DVT-left leg
Aug09 Diagnosed: COPD

05may2015
Un-detectable
Tcells 700
44%

Offline bear60

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  • Posts: 4,105
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #987 on: October 17, 2009, 09:55:02 am »
Hi Ron
Sorry you didnt make it to Gay Pride.  We had OUTFEST here last weekend but I didnt go because I was busy trying to finish up an outdoor project here at the house and none too soon because we are having two ( back to back) nor'easters here.  The temp dropped to 40's and a cold nasty rain.
Maybe you can offer your MOM a session with a massage therapist?
I know I would like to have a massage right now!
Joel
Poz Bear Type in Philadelphia

Offline AndyArrow

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Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #988 on: October 17, 2009, 10:40:30 am »
I'm surprised they didn't have you halve your dose of coumadin while on those antibiotics since they just don't play well together.  Hopefully, they will be able to get it back in range quickly.
It is not the arrival that matters.  It is the journey along the way. -- Michel Montaigne

Offline rondrond

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  • 22 years HIV+ yet a yard could be the death of me
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #989 on: October 24, 2009, 12:54:07 am »
Hi Ron
Sorry you didnt make it to Gay Pride.  We had OUTFEST here last weekend but I didnt go because I was busy trying to finish up an outdoor project....
Joel

I don't think I've ever heard of an OUTFEST.

I'm surprised they didn't have you halve your dose of coumadin while on those antibiotics since they just don't play well together.  Hopefully, they will be able to get it back in range quickly.

I'm not surprised by anything they do: here lately.

Grim Reaper...




I have gone from famine to feast. Waiting for any response from SSA: well, last week, I got a letter, stating that per our discussion on Oct 1 that I was not eligible: reason: I had stated that I did not want SSI. ??

I'm calling all my case workers and SSA and getting nothing but machines. First call back was the rep from the hospital. It turns out that she had called on my behalf trying to establish a start date. She used to work for SSA and has connections, and told me not to worry about the letter, it was just a computer generated letter and meant nothing.

Another letter arrives, in a different format, but stating that I was scheduled for a phone interview and that they needed me to send them my birth certificate, medical records and a signed, and witnessed medical release form. This was on Thursday: the phone interview is on Nov 2.

I determined that I was not going to send my original birth certificate through the mail: especially when SSA is downtown, and only 10 minutes down the road. Called my advocate and she called her contact and was told not to worry about the requested documents, especially as I stated that they should already have all this info as I sent it in my application.

She looked and  "oh, yeah, here it is. ." ..O.o  

Then they start talking bs..."oh, you have an IRA" well this should be no surprise: I included it in my application. bs continued to flow my way: you may not be eligible, if they determine that your IRA is a liquid asset (which nobody else has heretofore done)

 So, I spent two hours at the Credit Union today making arrangements: in case, and if they force me to cash it in. I'm going to give it all to Mom: for back rent.

Get home, and a third letter arrives, but this time it says all kinds of things that the other two had not: like needing to make sure that I have my account info available that I want to use for direct deposit: this was promising.

So, I am in a whirl, and not really knowing just what the heck to expect: somehow, I don't think this twister is going to drop me in Munchkinland.....

« Last Edit: October 24, 2009, 12:55:50 am by rondrond »
"I'm not done yet"....Glen Campbell

"I may not be exactly where I want to be, but I sure as Hell am not where I was"
Wynnona Judd

Diagnosed/HIV
1993
AZT
Norvir
1994-2001
Crixivan/Epivir/Zerit
No Meds for 7 Years

04jul07/DVT-right leg/Bi Lateral PE's     
16oct08/DVT-left leg
Aug09 Diagnosed: COPD

05may2015
Un-detectable
Tcells 700
44%

Offline denb45

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  • "1987 Classic Old School POZ+"
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #990 on: October 24, 2009, 11:27:27 am »


Get home, and a third letter arrives, but this time it says all kinds of things that the other two had not: like needing to make sure that I have my account info available that I want to use for direct deposit: this was promising.

If they wanted that info SSA (your bank account number for direct deposit) that does sound promising, however the previous 2 letters, are somewhat confusing, to say the least, I don't recall getting that many letters form SSA 12 yrs ago, before I was approved for SSDI, but the good news is , I do remember getting that direct deposit letter a few months before I got my reward letter, (the one that wanted me to fill in all the blanks for my bank account, if I wanted direct deposit or not) let's hope it all turns out that way for you too  ;)............and to answer the other question about your IRA, YES I would definitely put that in your mom's name, I'd do it right away, if I were you.........
« Last Edit: October 24, 2009, 11:36:12 am by denb45 »
"it's so nice to be insane, cause no-one ask you to explain" Helen Reddy cc 1974

Offline rondrond

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  • 22 years HIV+ yet a yard could be the death of me
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #991 on: October 24, 2009, 02:21:42 pm »
Dennis!  Where have you been? (hugs)

That's why I was at the Credit Union, making arrangements. very nice lady...gave me her personal number to call if I needed to get things done. I am pleased to see them asking for account numbers also: I love direct deposit.  

haunted house:



I've been increasing my computer skills, and I 'burned a cd' today. It was 'my first'. Unfortunately, it will only play in my computer and not in the CD player...

« Last Edit: October 24, 2009, 02:30:16 pm by rondrond »
"I'm not done yet"....Glen Campbell

"I may not be exactly where I want to be, but I sure as Hell am not where I was"
Wynnona Judd

Diagnosed/HIV
1993
AZT
Norvir
1994-2001
Crixivan/Epivir/Zerit
No Meds for 7 Years

04jul07/DVT-right leg/Bi Lateral PE's     
16oct08/DVT-left leg
Aug09 Diagnosed: COPD

05may2015
Un-detectable
Tcells 700
44%

Offline denb45

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  • Posts: 5,048
  • "1987 Classic Old School POZ+"
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #992 on: October 24, 2009, 02:39:59 pm »
Dennis!  Where have you been? (hugs)



I'm always lurking in the background, I'm still here ronnie, I haven't gone anywhere hon  :-*
« Last Edit: October 24, 2009, 02:42:06 pm by denb45 »
"it's so nice to be insane, cause no-one ask you to explain" Helen Reddy cc 1974

Offline rondrond

  • Member
  • Posts: 1,729
  • 22 years HIV+ yet a yard could be the death of me
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #993 on: October 25, 2009, 11:03:36 am »
Ok, as long as you're lurking near me.. :P

dark pumpkin...




I have further uncreased my computer skills: my 'burned' disc will only play in my computer and not in my player. because I used:
CD-R: which is for music. Videos are CD+R: who knew?

Maybe I can burn a CD of my brain, downloading everyhing I've learned: in case dementia sets in, I can 'Restore' myself using my backup files.
"I'm not done yet"....Glen Campbell

"I may not be exactly where I want to be, but I sure as Hell am not where I was"
Wynnona Judd

Diagnosed/HIV
1993
AZT
Norvir
1994-2001
Crixivan/Epivir/Zerit
No Meds for 7 Years

04jul07/DVT-right leg/Bi Lateral PE's     
16oct08/DVT-left leg
Aug09 Diagnosed: COPD

05may2015
Un-detectable
Tcells 700
44%

Offline leatherman

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  • Google and HIV meds are Your Friends
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #994 on: October 25, 2009, 11:37:58 am »
Maybe I can burn a CD of my brain, downloading everyhing I've learned: in case dementia sets in, I can 'Restore' myself using my backup files.
send me a copy of that software!  :D

thankfully, I've kept a blog since 1999. It started out as a way to "show" my Mom that teh aids and PCP really hadn't killed me ;D Now anytime I can't remember when something happened in the last 10 yrs or so, I go looking for the pictures or stories I posted. I really need to put a search function on the site now that it's been there so long. It's getting to be as hard to look through all those years as it is to just remember with my brain. ROFL
leatherman (aka Michael)

We were standing all alone
You were leaning in to speak to me
Acting like a mover shaker
Dancing to Madonna then you kissed me
And I think about it all the time
- Darren Hayes, "Chained to You"

Offline bear60

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Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #995 on: October 25, 2009, 11:42:31 am »
Hi Ron
OUTFEST coincides with national "COMING OUT DAY".  I think its Oct 15.  Part of the reason we have Outfest here is to generate funds for the June Gay Pride event.  Outfest is  a lot of fun if the weather is nice.  Lots of shirtless "boys".
Keep the faith brother....I think you are on the road to success.

Joel
Poz Bear Type in Philadelphia

Offline denb45

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  • "1987 Classic Old School POZ+"
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #996 on: October 25, 2009, 11:54:19 am »


Howdy there, Joel and Mickie, nice to see you fellas around here  ;D
« Last Edit: October 25, 2009, 01:15:56 pm by denb45 »
"it's so nice to be insane, cause no-one ask you to explain" Helen Reddy cc 1974

Offline rondrond

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  • 22 years HIV+ yet a yard could be the death of me
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #997 on: October 27, 2009, 03:26:23 pm »
Mikie,

I've haven't been to your blog for a month now, I gotta catch up.

Joel...shirtless boys...p

Hi Dennis.

restrictions...




I saw Dr G yesterday. I am in trouble, bubble. My blood pressure is spot on.
My triglycerides at 535 ~ are Baaaad
my bad cholesterol is good at 102
my good cholesterol: LDL is good,  HDL is Baaad...

blood sugar at 117!  Congratulations, you have crossed over form being pre-diabetic to Diabetic.

weight 274 ...Baaad

..and I thought I was going to have a good report with maybe a few gold stars. :(

My wound has healed over and I am working on trying to make the scar disappear. I am using neosporin: some say to use coco butter.
When I turn my hand, the area from the wound site to the thumb around to the first finger goes numb. DrG thinks that there is scar tissue involved with the nerves.
I can still use it, though.  :-\

Then, she kept looking at me. "What?" There is something wrong with your breathing. (I've been telling everybody that for years.) But now, I guess she decided to listen to me: especially since I was labopriouly trying to get some air: apparently some kind of asthma attack or she said COPD..which I did not want to hear.

 I reported that I have been having difficulty breathing ever since the rain started last month. The humidity is killing me. when I step outside it feels like a plastic bag has enveloped me and I can't breath.
So, I have an appointment to check my pulmonary distress to see if I have asthma or COPD.

I have an appointment with Physical Therapy

I have an appointment with the dietician: I have been ordered  to lose an incredible 74 lbs. She will hod off on the diabetes diagnosis: 110 is borderline 117 is diabaetic, I am just 7 over, which she thinks will go down WHEN i lose the weight. I am standing, looking at a craggy summit that is unsceable.

I have to admit defeat, that I can't do it on my own. Mom has suggested Weight Watchers. I will bring it up at the dietician appt. I am a whipped doggie on this weight issue. I have seen three other dieticians and am following their recommendations: to  no avail.

All my anticipated gold stars were littering the floor. I am a failure.

 But, I don't want diabetes: so I will listen. I will empty my head of all my intelligence that got me where I am now, and try something new, foreign and alien.

.and no more rice. What the heck am I supposed to..>.< there I go...clear your mind....oommmm...
auommmm...ommm.ommmm=

« Last Edit: October 27, 2009, 03:34:57 pm by rondrond »
"I'm not done yet"....Glen Campbell

"I may not be exactly where I want to be, but I sure as Hell am not where I was"
Wynnona Judd

Diagnosed/HIV
1993
AZT
Norvir
1994-2001
Crixivan/Epivir/Zerit
No Meds for 7 Years

04jul07/DVT-right leg/Bi Lateral PE's     
16oct08/DVT-left leg
Aug09 Diagnosed: COPD

05may2015
Un-detectable
Tcells 700
44%

Offline bear60

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  • Posts: 4,105
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #998 on: October 27, 2009, 04:02:36 pm »
Ron
This whole "DIET" thing as response to triglycerides and weight is such a bitch!!!!!!! Kurt has to maintain weight but so he is not overwight, but has to lower triglycerides.  So...no rice no bread no pasta....just lean meat and veggies basically.  ITs SO boring. Oh and he cant drink beer or any alchohol as it makes his blood sugar out of control.

Lets just say I wish he were on valium.
Poz Bear Type in Philadelphia

Offline denb45

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  • "1987 Classic Old School POZ+"
Re: Trials and Tribulations of an Old Poz Queen
« Reply #999 on: October 27, 2009, 04:31:12 pm »
Ron
This whole "DIET" thing as response to triglycerides and weight is such a bitch!!!!!!! Kurt has to maintain weight but so he is not overwight, but has to lower triglycerides.  So...no rice no bread no pasta....just lean meat and veggies basically.  ITs SO boring. Oh and he cant drink beer or any alchohol as it makes his blood sugar out of control.

Lets just say I wish he were on valium.
:-[
"it's so nice to be insane, cause no-one ask you to explain" Helen Reddy cc 1974

 


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