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Author Topic: My Take on the issues  (Read 14407 times)

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Offline Grinch

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  • Posts: 325
My Take on the issues
« on: November 14, 2006, 11:12:23 am »
   I've been giving the happenings here a lot of thought.  I've decided to post my feelings and be done with it.  I have no desire to get into a flame war with anyone.  I just feel that things are wrong.  This site is hardly the helpful friendly place it was in early '04. It has steadily evolved into a private club of sorts in which those that have certain views on life prevail. Woe upon the fool that stands up to those that dictate the way life ought to be.

   I have had heated discussions with a couple of members that feel differently than I do about different subjects but until recently I have respected the person behind the post (with one exception).

Joe, Moffie, Matty, we'll never agree on politics etc, but I have the utmost respect for you and your attitudes. Moffie I always, without fail gain something from your posts. You are indeed the wise old man that gives me hope and inspiration. Jas, hang in there. You've a future ahead of you.

   On to the meat of my post. I was chastised for openly criticizing a member of these forums. That by itself is not an issue with me.  For those that I offended, my apologies. My issue stems from the fact that the person I called out, constantly and with every post, belittles and makes claims against our elected officials.  He has every right to his opinion, however, by entering the political arena himself he is now open to the very same criticism he so openly engages in on a daily basis.

   Members of this forum have made statements that various politicians should be put in jail, should be murdered, and any of an entire list of such things.  Let me call out one single person and question his politics and the wrath of the moderators swoops down on me with a gag order.
If I had made the exact same statements about Bush or any other Republican politician, I would have been clapped on the back and welcomed to the other side with open arms.

   There have been discussions about the “Face of AIDS” Guess what folks, look at anyone walking down the street. You're looking at the face of AIDS. This is not a gay, or drug user, or any other group of people disease.  It effects all of us.  Unfortunately most of us have no safe place to go to be around those other people that endure this horrible disease. There are 500 people in the entire state in which I live listed as HIV+.  Do you think there are many people for me to talk to? My outlet, this site.  My problem? I get to watch every day as people make strong statements I disagree with.  I get to watch one individual promote his personal agenda in a manner I find personally offensive.  That individual has not only the right but the backing of the owners of this site to spread his hate and self promote himself.  I however may not call him on it.

   Please tell me, what is the difference between me questioning the morals of a politician that happens to be a member of this site, and others “bashing” other politicians?

   Please tell me why people with zero medical training can make statements about health care issues that are against what physicians will tell you, yet if I call those people out and dispute their claims, I get chastised.  I'm the one with a lifetime in the medical field, but my opinion doesn't match that of one of the “in crowd” I believe it is because my opinion places some responsibility on us as HIV+ people. Again we are all entitled to our opinion, but over and over I have seen one opinion is OK, if however you dare to argue that opinion, look out.

   As I see it there is one path to posting anything you'd like here. You must be gay or female, you must be socially and fiscally liberal, you must be willing to accept anything that the “In crowd” says as gospel.  That's not my idea of a support group.  Thats a private club.  Non-conformists need not apply.

Offline Moffie65

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  • Posts: 1,755
  • Living POZ since 1983
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #1 on: November 14, 2006, 11:25:19 am »
Thank you Grinch,

It is not easy to sometimes say what is uncomfortable to the "group", but here you have made it very clear that you have not only the right to your opinion, but the responsibilty to share the same, even though it might be uncomfortable for you and some of the readers.

I am also guilty of some insensitivity here, and to combat that, I am now making every attempt to read the posts with the mind that the author is typing genuine life altering situations, and it is my responsibility to treat each one with the respect that they deserve.  Thanks once again for letting us in on your very uncomfortable feelings at this time.  I trust that you will not leave, and that you will find the ability to stay and work with us to allow you to have the feelings which are yours and yours alone; yet still honor them.

In Love,
The Bible contains 6 admonishments to homosexuals,
and 362 to heterosexuals.
This doesn't mean that God doesn't love heterosexuals,
It's just that they need more supervision.
Lynn Lavne

Offline ACinKC

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  • Bring it VIRUS! #2 Ranked In-crowd Member!
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #2 on: November 14, 2006, 12:19:49 pm »
Agree with moffie.

With one subpoint.  Keep in mind I have NO CLUE to what the back story is.

It seems to me you are complaining about people not agreeing with your opinion which is not in agreeance with the majority (supposed) opinion.  Doesnt that seem a little pot calling the kettle black?

Please take that as an outsider reading and summarizing your post and NOT belittling your feelings at all.  I neither support you or disagree with you.  As I am not gay and not a female they do not allow me to form opinions!!! LOL  Had to do it.... Im the funny non-gay brother of this site!
LIFE is not a race to the grave with the intention of arriving safely
in a pretty and well-preserved body, but, rather to skid in broadside,
thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming--WOW! WHAT A
RIDE!!!

Offline Boo Radley

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  • Not a "real man" and damn proud, mithter... FAB
    • Animal Rescue New Orleans
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #3 on: November 14, 2006, 12:46:06 pm »
   ...    I was chastised for openly criticizing a member of these forums. That by itself is not an issue with me.  For those that I offended, my apologies. My issue stems from the fact that the person I called out, constantly and with every post, belittles and makes claims against our elected officials.  He has every right to his opinion, however, by entering the political arena himself he is now open to the very same criticism he so openly engages in on a daily basis.

   Members of this forum have made statements that various politicians should be put in jail, should be murdered, and any of an entire list of such things.  Let me call out one single person and question his politics and the wrath of the moderators swoops down on me with a gag order.
...

You were rightly chastised for posting what amounted to a hissy fit against a forum member, going so far as to tell him he was stealing money from others who were truly in need (my paraphrase).   Your attack had absolutely nothing to do with the thread.   Mr. Staley's warning to you was warranted.

Except for one post about herpes in which you scold Ann for providing accurate information I saw no others among the 26 you've made which dealt with medical issues so don't know why you make that complaint.  One does not need to be a physician or scientist to be well-informed about HIV/AIDS  and your "lifetime in the medical field" may or may not be relevant in this situation.  Breast cancer and AIDS are not comparable.


...As I see it there is one path to posting anything you'd like here. You must be gay or female, you must be socially and fiscally liberal, you must be willing to accept anything that the “In crowd” says as gospel.  That's not my idea of a support group.  Thats a private club.  Non-conformists need not apply.

   

Those claims are simply asinine.  The vast majority of people on the forums are extremely supportive on issues for which one needs support.  Politics is not an issue on which you can ask for support.  The support offered here has nothing to do with one's sexuality, gender, or political views.  If you don't like the tone of political threads don't read them.  Start your own threads exalting the virtues of GW Bush or Cheney or Condi Rice or whomever you please. 

Boo

P.S. Shouldn't this thread be in the off-topic arena?
« Last Edit: November 14, 2006, 12:47:48 pm by Boo Radley »
String up every aristocrat!
Out with the priests and let them live on their fat!





Everything I do, say, think, excrete, secrete, exude, ooze, or write © 2007 Sweet Old Boo, Inc.

Offline Grinch

  • Member
  • Posts: 325
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #4 on: November 14, 2006, 01:48:03 pm »
I guess my point wasn't expressed clearly.  My complaint is not that someone disagrees with me. My point is. If I disagree with someone, and this goes back before the new boards, I get the wrath of the vocal minority.  They may say what they like, in any manner they like, with no repercussions.

  I did not “Throw a hissy fit” with the member I find offensive. I spoke in the same manner he speaks of other politicians. Because he is a politician himself he should be open to the same “bashing” that others are subjected to. The same tone he uses when speaking about other politicians.

 I have seen time and again, relentless attacks on people that have just given up.  Yet it seems to me those that don't go along with the group will get swift retribution if they dare open their mouth. This includes official censure from the powers that be.

  The key phrase in my gay/ female...  statement is post “ANYTHING THEY WANT”
I was by no means saying you weren't allowed to post. What I was saying is, unless this is by and large your demographic, you must post in a manner as to not offend.  Those in the “in crowd” may speak in any manner they choose.  This “in crowd” I speak of is the demographic I spoke of.

  Regarding Ann's post I do feel it is irresponsible for a moderator to tell anyone that you can't spread herpes if you're on prophylaxis anti viral meds.  I do have training in this area and I have asked a physician his opinion.  He concurred that while it significantly reduces the risk it does not take it to “Virtually nonexistent”  I scolded her not because of her opinion, but because of her position as moderator. As a moderator her opinion is taken as set in stone by new people. That is what I took issue with.

  Regarding skipping political threads, sure no problem, get rid of politically based signatures, quit interjecting political views into threads, quit advertising for your political web sites that you disguise as HIV web sites, quit promoting your agendas each and every time you sign on. 
Force these things on me and eventually I'll push back.

   My whole issue is I'm forced to read the opinions of the chosen few but heaven help me if I disagree. There is no open exchange of ideas, there is only the accepted group opinion.

  Belittling my beliefs and taking snippets of conversation out of context will not change this opinion. I would welcome someone to explain how I am wrong in my over all feeling.  This is not about politics, meds, or any one subject.  It is instead the overall feeling I get when taking this forum as a whole.

    Moffie, nah I'm pretty much done here friend.  I'm looking for somewhere else to talk about AIDS in a manner that's comfortable.  Somewhere that won't force me to sift through agendas and rhetoric. Somewhere that ten or so people don't dictate the “Correct view” on any given issue.

Offline poet

  • Member
  • Posts: 934
  • Poet living and working in Central Maine
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #5 on: November 14, 2006, 02:09:31 pm »
I, too, have missed the backstory on things.  I did pick up (as a gay man) this: Please tell me why people with zero medical training can make statements about health care issues that are against what physicians will tell you, yet if I call those people out and dispute their claims, I get chastised.  I'm the one with a lifetime in the medical field, but my opinion doesn't match that of one of the “in crowd” I believe it is because my opinion places some responsibility on us as HIV+ people. Again we are all entitled to our opinion, but over and over I have seen one opinion is OK, if however you dare to argue that opinion, look out.

Having been positive since 1984, having been told by a now AIDS medical expert then that my acute retroviral syndrome was a bad case of the flu or that I must, must, must take AZT (when we had mono-therapy) and yes, having bought in for a time with AL721 (?) and read the NATIVE articles about the cause or not of AIDS/hiv, I hope that all of us are open to learning, are open to expressing our opinions even if what we feel to be right or true might vary with medical 'experts.' There is, has been, and most likely will continue to be much about hiv and AIDS which we don't quite understand.  (Remember when the cocktail was deemed 'the answer' which would end AIDS?  Or when we thought, as some still do, that a medication break is ok?)   I hope that everyone reading our posts looks at them as posts, thinks about what is typed on the page and makes his/her own decision based on posts, opinions from personals doctors, articles read elsewhere.  Win
Winthrop Smith has published three collections of poetry: Ghetto: From The First Five; The Weigh-In: Collected Poems; Skin Check: New York Poems.  The last was published in December 2006.  He has a work-in-progress underway titled Starting Positions.

Offline Lis

  • Member
  • Posts: 604
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #6 on: November 14, 2006, 02:47:02 pm »
Grinch,

as a woman who is a political conservative , I knew that my views of the world were not "going with the flow" I have tried to stay out of all the gov bashing.. but on the other hand, Ive gotten myself in a whole lot of trouble for other opinions... it is what it is... i am like you.. there is NO ONE that i know in my area with AIDS/HIV  i am the poster child.. ( and jeez... I wish that I could get alittle airbrushing!!!)  I for one hope that you stay.. you offer so much..  Crap, for all i know, I'm one of the people your talkin about... NONE of the petty shit matters... its about the big picture! and you have the power, mind and will to make it a GREAT SHOT!!

lisbeth
poz 1986....

Offline skeebo1969

  • Member
  • Posts: 5,931
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #7 on: November 14, 2006, 03:18:19 pm »


  Grinch,

     I am not familiar with what is exactly behind this and don't have the time to go through your posts to see your validity, if it's there that is.   I will say this though you do not have to be gay or a female to enjoy the support of these forums.   Now that's not to say that I have not been called things like a breeder, but I have used that myself as a joke.    We have had members come in gay, flirt with everyone... turn straight and frown on the same people they flirted with months ago...  Same said person suddenly finds the gay lifestyle offensive.   That is the closest I have ever seen anyone here come to having an issue based on sexuality and it was only because of the hypocrisy of it all more or less.    Not because he wanted to screw a woman who was.....  Ok I'll stop there going to far.

    I have seen flirting from gays.  Flirting from straights...  I was never admonished for my flirting or perceived straightness.   Everyone here knows my story and how I came to be because of my ramblings in the past...

   I have never been made to feel uncomfortable here...  Except when I was an asshole and being highly disrespectful to both new and old members.  Yes some of it was legit, but I need to learn to deal with people with a certain amount of respect.... and that is a work in progress.    People like Matty.....  who stayed up many a night on IM with me when I came here and helped me through rough times..   People like Moffie who called after a long day at his ASO (if I can remember correctly) because I was just a mess..   People like Joe who gave me an asskicking over the phone because I was acting like a child concerning my fears...   No they knew who I was....

    Matty had me rolling one terrible night with the following comment...


   Tommy your not gay, your queer!   I told him I don't know the difference...  He said a gay guy likes men, a queer posts recipes in the off topic forum.  Which is what I was doing at the time...  I still remember that because it was one of the many times Matty made me  smile.

    I try (without to much luck) to stay out of heated debates like politics, racial issues, and religion.   Whether your here or anywhere those things will always wind up heated and debated......

    I just take exception that this place is for gays and females.  That is simply not the case and not true at all.

     I have made amends to a few here this past week and it is strictly because I lost site of what this place is here for and realize where I made mistakes.   I need this place for education, support, and just plain friends who understand..  I've fractured a few but hope I can gain their trust back one day because what they did in the past came from the heart and for that I am grateful....

   Grinch....  I wish you all the luck in the world if you choose to stay away.  I've looked there is no place like this one.. 

Thomas

I despise the song Love is in the Air, you should too.

Offline skeebo1969

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Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #8 on: November 14, 2006, 03:19:20 pm »

   Ditto what Lis said..... Ditto Ditto Ditto.


     Good stuff Lis....
I despise the song Love is in the Air, you should too.

Offline bocker3

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  • You gotta enjoy life......
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #9 on: November 14, 2006, 03:51:48 pm »
Grinch,

I have to give my "take" also -- although I generally try to stay clear of these types of threads.
First, I would be right up in front supporting your, or anyone's, right to speak their mind on here.  I HAVE fought and bled for our right to do so in the US and would again (except I would no longer be welcomed back into the Army).  I do believe however that on this site we need to keep it civil.  That last part being the key.  Now I have not gone back and reread all of your posts, but I did see the posts in the thread that I think is behind this.  What I have read was not you stating your political thoughts, expressions, etc, what I read was an attack on a forum member.  It would seem to me that this is why you were called to the carpet.  If you have examples of where you expressed your feelings/beliefs without attacking another forum member and were subsequently chastised, please let me know.
Now -- you can certainly leave this forum, but I would hope that you will stay.  While, we are probably going to be on different sides of many issues, I LIKE being challenged by the other side's views.  I like to be caused to rethink and at times, have my mind changed.  However that only happens when we have civil discussions and not personalize others thoughts.  Attack ads turned me off in the election and they will turn me off here.  What will get my attention is thoughtful discussions.  Politics is a dangerous discussion because people no longer accept that other views are simply that -- OTHER VIEWS -- not necessarily right or wrong.  We have developed into an area where the "other side" is evil and wrong, if they don't agree with us.  That is true of both sides -- and I fall into it at times too.
We are all here for support around a virus -- let's keep that out front.  Let's agree to disagree on some things, but let's also know (or hope) that we would be there to help anyone in their battle with HIV, whether gay or straight, male or female, Red state or Blue state, etc. etc.

That's my 2 cents anyway.

Hugs to all,
Mike

Offline Boo Radley

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  • Not a "real man" and damn proud, mithter... FAB
    • Animal Rescue New Orleans
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #10 on: November 14, 2006, 05:14:36 pm »
I guess my point wasn't expressed clearly.  My complaint is not that someone disagrees with me. My point is. If I disagree with someone, and this goes back before the new boards, I get the wrath of the vocal minority.  They may say what they like, in any manner they like, with no repercussions.
...
   My whole issue is I'm forced to read the opinions of the chosen few but heaven help me if I disagree. There is no open exchange of ideas, there is only the accepted group opinion.

Can you provide an example?  I have gone back to look over your posts and don't see evidence of your claim.  In one thread you started there were a couple of posts you were unhappy with (and one of them was, IMHO, valid) but there were other posts which directly responded to your question and there was no single, monolithic opinion railing against you.   You stopped posting in the thread even after a couple of people directly responded.  How is that an example of "groupthink" haranging you?

Quote
  Belittling my beliefs and taking snippets of conversation out of context will not change this opinion. I would welcome someone to explain how I am wrong in my over all feeling.  This is not about politics, meds, or any one subject.  It is instead the overall feeling I get when taking this forum as a whole.

Who belittled your beliefs or used your words out of context?  Did I?  If so I apologize.

No one can disprove a feeling as feelings are emotional.  I often get the feeling I'm invisible here and don't fit in with the clique but that doesn't stop me from posting when I find something of interest.   I'll never find a site which is a perfect fit for me but AIDSmeds is close enough.  I skip over the crap and benefit from what I can.  I sincerely suggest you do the same.

You seem to have major issues with one person so put him on ignore.  I haven't had to resort to this feature on the "new" forums but I certainly did on the previous incarnation.  If one person is such an irritant it's not worth bothering with that person.

Boo

String up every aristocrat!
Out with the priests and let them live on their fat!





Everything I do, say, think, excrete, secrete, exude, ooze, or write © 2007 Sweet Old Boo, Inc.

Offline Grinch

  • Member
  • Posts: 325
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #11 on: November 15, 2006, 09:00:26 am »
  Boo,

I am commenting on the state of these forums as a whole.  I am not commenting and dissecting each and every post and response to my posts and my posts alone. Please try to get away from the common practice of looking at a post. Pulling it apart word by word and arriving at a different meaning than the author intended. Instead read the entire post and understand what the person behind the post is trying to say. Not everyone is an eloquent writer, but if one looks at the entire thought the person is trying to convey, I think you'll see a lot less argument and dissension.  Joe and I once had a major disagreement because both of us read the parts of a post we wanted to, not the whole idea. Once we got past that we "Shook hands" and went away with a bit of respect for each other.

   This forum is not friendly to those that do not toe the party line. That is what I am saying. I am further saying that once one has achieved a certain status, that person may post what he wants, in any manner he wants with very little worry about moderators/owners jumping in. I understand that there exceptions to this rule such as recent events.  These however are so rare that we must have a stickied thread asking if it's OK to gag them until things calm down.

   I also stated that with very rare exceptions a person must be of a certain demographic in order to achieve this untouchable status.

   Regarding my personal attack on a member.  I followed the rules that member laid out when discussing politicians. He is a politician therefore he is subject to the same treatment he gives others. You step into the ring sir you're fair game to get hit, end of story.  I feel no remorse for attacking a politician that I feel is acting unethically. My actions were no different than his or any of a whole list of others. Those people were not and have never been chastised for attacking a politician. They were in fact encouraged by the "Leadership" of this forum.

 Like it or not the individual I attacked is an active politician.

   Never did I enter into political discussions with other members that are not crossing into active politics themselves. If anyone here is unable to make that distinction well...  I apologize I simply can't make it any clearer.

   These are my opinions.  These opinions were formed by nearly three years of watching, reading, and occasionally participating. A person doesn't need to be in the midst of a debate in a forum in order to see that there is a problem that goes far beyond one particular argument.

Now, before you start replying, go back, read the entire thing again, figure out the "Big Picture" of what I'm saying and wait 30 seconds before you call me a closed minded idiot.

Offline MoltenStorm

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Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #12 on: November 15, 2006, 10:48:26 am »
I agree with Grinch because I have been on the receiving end of that "clique" mentality. I'm not saying everyone does it, but it is a valid, and sadly, very true point.

I'd also like to add to Grinch's point, I have also found that when someone doesn't like what you're trying to say, they will nit-pick your post to death with specifics in an attempt to discredit you and thus nullify your point. I have found that to be the case when speaking against the "Elite Minority."

Most will remember a certain thread I started asking why certain behaviors were accepted in certain forums. I dared to question a member that is in the "Elite Minority," and the thread was basically locked and ignored after a series of flame wars broke out trying to silence me and nit-pick what I said to death by a certain other loquacious member. If this other member isn't in the Inner Circle of the "Elite Minority," he's at least in the Outer Circle of it.

My point is that Grinch is right. Sadly, he is.

(Edited for spelling corrections)
« Last Edit: November 15, 2006, 11:01:26 am by MoltenStorm »
"Love is always patient and kind. It is never jealous. Love is never boastful nor conceited. It is never rude or selfish. It does not take offense and is not resentful. Love takes no pleasure in other people's sins, but delights in the truth. It is always ready to excuse, to trust, to hope, and to endure whatever comes." - 1 Corinthians 13:4-7, adaptation in A Walk To Remember

CD4: 555 / 29% / Undetectable - 7 Nov 2006
CD4: 555 / 29% / Undetectable - 5 Feb 2007

Offline ACinKC

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  • Bring it VIRUS! #2 Ranked In-crowd Member!
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #13 on: November 15, 2006, 10:58:25 am »
Molten.... Discredify isnt a word, so we must throw out your entire post.

Sincerest apologies,
Exalted Leader
American Clique International Corporation Inc. of America

NO FAIR MOLTEN!!! YOU CHANGED IT!!!  CHEATER CHEATER!!!
Edited because Molten cheated and now "I" look like the idiot!
« Last Edit: November 15, 2006, 11:09:02 am by ACinKC »
LIFE is not a race to the grave with the intention of arriving safely
in a pretty and well-preserved body, but, rather to skid in broadside,
thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming--WOW! WHAT A
RIDE!!!

Offline David_CA

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  • Posts: 3,246
  • Joined: March 2006
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #14 on: November 15, 2006, 12:43:27 pm »
I don't know what the trouble is.  I don't feel like I'm part of a group; actually, I do, as I'm part of a group of people with HIV.  I don't get singled out, my posts don't get nit-picked, and I don't feel left out.  From what I've seen, those who put positive energy into posts, those who don't dwell on the negative seem go get the most out of the forums.  It's funny, but that's kind of like life in general.

Maybe it's because I'm of a "certain demographic" and I've achieved the "untouchable status".  After all, I am a gay male.  It seems like the majority of the members here are gay males.  Perhaps that makes some who are not gay males feel uncomfortable.  That's a subject we wore out a long time ago in these forums.  Some of our most respected members (to me, anyway), are straight females.  I'd say the feelings of not fitting in are specific to those individuals and not to the group as a whole.

I'm not saying that I've not had run-ins with a few members from time to time.  I'm not saying that I particularly like everybody here.  I just try to keep it all in perspective. 

David
Black Friday 03-03-2006
03-23-06 CD4 359 @27.4% VL 75,938
06-01-06 CD4 462 @24.3% VL > 100,000
08-15-06 CD4 388 @22.8% VL >  "
10-21-06 CD4 285 @21.9% VL >  "
  Atripla started 12-01-2006
01-08-07 CD4 429 @26.8% VL 1872!
05-08-07 CD4 478 @28.1% VL 740
08-03-07 CD4 509 @31.8% VL 370
11-06-07 CD4 570 @30.0% VL 140
02-21-08 CD4 648 @32.4% VL 600
05-19-08 CD4 695 @33.1% VL < 48 undetectable!
08-21-08 CD4 725 @34.5%
11-11-08 CD4 672 @39.5%
02-11-09 CD4 773 @36.8%
05-11-09 CD4 615 @36.2%
08-19-09 CD4 770 @38.5%
11-19-09 CD4 944 @33.7%
02-17-10 CD4 678 @39.9%  
06-03-10 CD4 768 @34.9%
09-21-10 CD4 685 @40.3%
01-10-11 CD4 908 @36.3%
05-23-11 CD4 846 @36.8% VL 80
02-13-12 CD4 911 @41.4% VL<20
You must be the change you want to see in the world.  Mahatma Gandhi

Offline yowsaa

  • Member
  • Posts: 86
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #15 on: November 15, 2006, 03:31:45 pm »
Treat people the way you would like to be treated. Simply with dignity and respect. I cannot control what others say or do. I can control how I react or what I say and do.
Gay, straight, whatever, we are all Gods children.

All in my very humble opinion.
When I am wrong, promptly admit it.

Offline ACinKC

  • Member
  • Posts: 2,994
  • Bring it VIRUS! #2 Ranked In-crowd Member!
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #16 on: November 15, 2006, 05:02:46 pm »
I thought I acheived the "untouchable status" the day I was diagnosed!!!

Seriously guys, chill.  It's fun to debate some things, I can't stand Jacks stance on politics but I like the guy.  I mean his side of the argument REALLY hacks me off sometimes but still I have no ill will toward the man.  He can pick apart my posts all he likes as I do it to him sometimes.  Now I am NOT singling out Jack for all of us to start picking on, lord knows he brings that on himself!  Just giving you one instance in my history on this site. 

Attack the message not the messenger is a good motto to follow.  But I understand some people get so wrapped up in "their" message it is hard to distinguish at times.  The world isnt fair, if it was, I wouldnt have cooties!!!
LIFE is not a race to the grave with the intention of arriving safely
in a pretty and well-preserved body, but, rather to skid in broadside,
thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming--WOW! WHAT A
RIDE!!!

Offline jack

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  • Posts: 1,578
  • fomerly the loser known as Jake
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #17 on: November 15, 2006, 05:13:02 pm »
I have always said "if you dont have something nice to say about someone,fuck it,go ahead and say it anyways".

Offline J.R.E.

  • Member
  • Posts: 8,207
  • Positive since 1985, joined forums 12/03
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #18 on: November 15, 2006, 07:07:08 pm »
Treat people the way you would like to be treated. Simply with dignity and respect. I cannot control what others say or do. I can control how I react or what I say and do.



VERY WELL STATED !!! Couldn't agree with you more !!



Ray
Current Meds ; Viramune / Epzicom Eliquis, Diltiazem. Pravastatin 80mg, Ezetimibe. UPDATED 2/18/24
 Tested positive in 1985,.. In October of 2003, My t-cell count was 16, Viral load was over 500,000, Percentage at that time was 5%. I started on  HAART on October 24th, 2003.

 As of Oct 2nd, 2023, Viral load Undetectable.
CD 4 @676 /  CD4 % @ 18 %
Lymphocytes,absolute-3815 (within range)


72 YEARS YOUNG

Offline Iggy

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  • Posts: 2,434
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #19 on: November 15, 2006, 10:47:24 pm »
.
« Last Edit: January 12, 2007, 07:46:21 pm by Iggy »

Offline Eldon

  • Member
  • Posts: 2,664
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #20 on: November 15, 2006, 11:36:32 pm »

I don't know what the trouble is.  I don't feel like I'm part of a group; actually, I do, as I'm part of a group of people with HIV.  I don't get singled out, my posts don't get nit-picked, and I don't feel left out.  From what I've seen, those who put positive energy into posts, those who don't dwell on the negative seem go get the most out of the forums.  It's funny, but that's kind of like life in general.


Hello Grinch,

PERCEIVE --- to attain awareness or understanding of.

The very foundation of this forum was developed to assist others with support with HIV/AIDS. In this forum there are Straight, Gay, Lesbian, and others from all different walks of this life. Each and every person has a different background, they deal with anxiety, they deal with depression and a they have a different "perspective" on topics in this life. We are here to increase our knowledge and our "awareness" of HIV/AIDS.

In fact, this site is a very good avenue that is available to the World for anyone who has been diagnosed with HIV/AIDS to come and ask questions and share other events that occur in their lives. Count your blessings. There are some who do not have a significant other, or a husband or a wife to support them and to talk about things to get it out in the open. When you join a mass number of people together, you are bound to have some sort of disagreement. In this life, it is all about "understanding".

Each and every one of us has a different viewpoint or "take" on certain things from within. This is a means for their "voice" to be heard. Writting it out is extremely therapeutic as well as fulfilling to the individual from within. Each and every person has their own free will to make their own "choices". They either "choose" to be "positive" or they either "choose" to be "negative". There is darkness and there is light. There is the Sun and there is the Moon.

If a certain anger or a disagreement presents itself to us, then (9) nine times out of (10)ten these anxieties are coming from within. When this situation is presented, it is up to each and every one of us to make a "choice" as to "how" we are going to "accept" it. Then after we "accept" it, is when we "communicate" in order to gain and "understanding".

In fact, ALL misunderstandings are from the direct "cause" of not having an "understanding" of what that particular person is trying to "present" to their audience.

When faced in opposition or a disagreement, ask yourself "WHY" are you are having this sort of "perception" from what the writer is saying? The answer is within you, every single time. In fact, you will catch yourself saying "That person really has a point to what they are saying".

Negative thoughts lead to negative actions.

Positive thoughts lead to positive actions.

We feel what we think. It is up to us to have a more realistic view of our world and ourselves. Each and every one of us needs to "realize" that WE are responsible for how WE feel and no one else is to blame for this. Look inside of you and you will see.

In this life, you will experience many different "statements" or "responses" from different people from different places as we all walk on our "journey" in this life. There is a reason that you brought this up, and you are trying to understand the certain aspects of all of actions that have taken place on this forum. The BEST thing that you can DO is to extend as much support as you can to each and everyone and to gain or "understand" their views that they have in this life.

Make the BEST of each and every Day!

P.S. --- "What you put into it, is what you get out of it."
« Last Edit: November 15, 2006, 11:47:15 pm by Eldon »

Offline Terry

  • Member
  • Posts: 339
  • 7/13/82 Infected
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #21 on: November 16, 2006, 01:37:52 am »
Grinch,

I’ve held my two cents worth, back as long as I can bare to do it. You have been receiving some wonderful comments from most people. Except for one person, whom I’m sure doesn't know what the Hell he’s talking about. Seemingly, he might be just a little bit lonely and has the need/desire to lash out at someone. So “Tag” your it.

Un-like most, if not all that have been commenting above, I do know who you were referring to when Peter asked you if you knew this person? You might have asked Peter if He knows this person? I doubt it

I have met that person. And for Your Information, he is not a politician. He is anything but that. In your original comments made directly to him, you were right on and correct in your observations about him. He is not nor does he have anything to do with the Sonoma County Board of Directors or Board of Supervisors. Enough about him.

This whole gay/straight thing that you mentioned, in away, is kind of funny. At least to me it is. Here on this web site, my main focus is about HIV/AIDS. Most of the time when I read something in the threads, it’s not who the writer is, or whether I could get them in the sack. It’s what can I learn and maybe what can I share with them/us.

I recently received a pm from a person (A rather pleasant/sweet man) accusing me of being too homophobic in my comments to some of the “beloved members.” He was shocked to learn that I’m NOT straight but instead Gay. Sadly, I feel he was even more disappointed when he found out how really old I am. LOL.

Grinch, I don’t usually say this to many people, and please don’t let it go to your head, but I like you and I enjoy the contribution you have made to this site. I especially liked what you said to Lisbeth in her thread, FIDO (Fuck It Drive On) She is a very special person. Just as Jake/Jack is also special to me.

Please take some of your own advise and don’t allow one person to annoy you to the point that you take yourself away from persons/people/us that could and do benefit from what you have to offer them.


PS. Read everything I just said and then re-read it again. Plus all of the other wonderful responses you’ve received in your thread. Pretty impressive if I have to say so myself.   ;D











« Last Edit: November 16, 2006, 02:05:33 am by Terry »

Offline Queen Tokelove

  • Member
  • Posts: 6,031
  • Smokey the Smurf
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #22 on: November 16, 2006, 02:01:59 am »
I usually try to stay out of political threads for 2 reasons, first they usually lead to some type of argument and second, I really don't know jack about politics. I think it is quite sad that this has gone on for so long. I am full of cliches but I will use one anyway, opinions are like assholes, everybody's got one. So imho, why get upset?

As far as the cliques go, I have never been a part of any, could've been but has always chosen to be a loner. And from my experience when you try to be in a clique there is always someone's ass you got to kiss to get in it, sorry I don't do ass kissing well at all. Since I have been here such a short time, I do not know about any cliques, I don't care to. I try to look at everyone for their uniqueness, if that makes sense.

As my Mama use to say,"Even a dog is due respect." Think about it......
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

Offline Grinch

  • Member
  • Posts: 325
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #23 on: November 16, 2006, 05:27:16 pm »
  Those that read my posts and responded as if you had read the whole thing, not just 1 little piece.  Thanks.
Those that latched on to one little phrase... forget about it, we'll never be able to communicate effectively.

Moderators/owners/untouchables, this is one thread I'd have liked to hear you chime in on in an honest and open manner.

We spoke about 3 separate issues in the thread, none are resolved, but I said my piece.

For the record, I don't believe for one second we will or should all agree on everything.  I do strongly believe both sides of any argument should be allowed their point of view.

And for clarity's  sake because I guess I have phrased this poorly:
The statement As I see it there is one path to posting anything you'd like here. You must be gay or female, you must be socially and fiscally liberal, you must be willing to accept anything that the “In crowd” says as gospel. means you must be all of the above. gay or female AND socially and fiscally liberal AND...

Do not try to twist this into a gay vs straight thing. If you take the time to look at the entire sentence that should be very clear to you.

Offline David_CA

  • Member
  • Posts: 3,246
  • Joined: March 2006
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #24 on: November 16, 2006, 06:00:18 pm »
At this point, about the best I can say is... whatever.  You're right, we'll (you and 'us') will probably never be able to communicate effectively.  This happens sometimes.  There have been about 20 replies to your initial post and you don't seem to have picked up anything from any of them... at least your replies don't indicate such.  People are taking the time to reply to your post, generally in a helpful and friendly manner, but you don't even acknowledge that ANYBODY BUT YOU has any valid points.  Some people don't get along with certain groups, and that's ok.  I'll state again what I said in a previous reply "From what I've seen, those who put positive energy into posts, those who don't dwell on the negative seem go get the most out of the forums."  How about showing that you're trying to improve things (positive) and not just complaining (negative).  Good luck.

David
Black Friday 03-03-2006
03-23-06 CD4 359 @27.4% VL 75,938
06-01-06 CD4 462 @24.3% VL > 100,000
08-15-06 CD4 388 @22.8% VL >  "
10-21-06 CD4 285 @21.9% VL >  "
  Atripla started 12-01-2006
01-08-07 CD4 429 @26.8% VL 1872!
05-08-07 CD4 478 @28.1% VL 740
08-03-07 CD4 509 @31.8% VL 370
11-06-07 CD4 570 @30.0% VL 140
02-21-08 CD4 648 @32.4% VL 600
05-19-08 CD4 695 @33.1% VL < 48 undetectable!
08-21-08 CD4 725 @34.5%
11-11-08 CD4 672 @39.5%
02-11-09 CD4 773 @36.8%
05-11-09 CD4 615 @36.2%
08-19-09 CD4 770 @38.5%
11-19-09 CD4 944 @33.7%
02-17-10 CD4 678 @39.9%  
06-03-10 CD4 768 @34.9%
09-21-10 CD4 685 @40.3%
01-10-11 CD4 908 @36.3%
05-23-11 CD4 846 @36.8% VL 80
02-13-12 CD4 911 @41.4% VL<20
You must be the change you want to see in the world.  Mahatma Gandhi

Offline Eldon

  • Member
  • Posts: 2,664
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #25 on: November 16, 2006, 06:45:30 pm »
 
And for clarity's  sake because I guess I have phrased this poorly:
The statement As I see it there is one path to posting anything you'd like here. You must be gay or female, you must be socially and fiscally liberal, you must be willing to accept anything that the “In crowd” says as gospel. means you must be all of the above. gay or female AND socially and fiscally liberal AND...


Hey Grinch,

Our dear forum member David has stated it ever so clearly. There is nothing that has been "mandated" that you must be of a certain lifestyle in order to post in these forums. Again, this is a group of different people, with different lifestyles, with different backgrounds, with different perspectives, with anxiety disorders, with depression disorders, and they are dealing with other aspects of their very lives in this life.

This is a support forum in order to encourage, share, and "learn" about our experiences in this life with HIV/AIDS.

Some individuals will "read" what they want to "read"....

Some individuals will "hear" what they want to "hear"...

Some individuals will "perceive" what they want to "perceive"...

The bottom line...It is solely up to the individual to make their "choices" in this life, either to have a "positive" approach, or a "negative" approach to situations in this life.

We are here to support each other through our experiences with "Living With HIV". Their LIFESTYLE has no bearing on this factual statement.

Make the BEST of each and every Day...In fact, It is all up to YOU to make it that way!

Offline Grinch

  • Member
  • Posts: 325
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #26 on: November 16, 2006, 06:50:31 pm »
Those that read my posts and responded as if you had read the whole thing, not just 1 little piece.  Thanks.


Is that not clear?

Those that read my posts. Thank you.
Those that responded as if they had done so. Thank you.

No commentary as to the tone of the post.
No disagreement.
No thank you if you agree with me.
No fuck you if you disagree with me.

Simple statement, aimed at those that took the time to read entire sentances.

Offline Grinch

  • Member
  • Posts: 325
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #27 on: November 16, 2006, 07:09:52 pm »
Eldon, I refuse to believe you are as dense as you last post indicates.

My statement was. There appears to be a selected group of individuals that do not have to follow the same rules of common courtesy as the rest of the members of this forum. I refer to this group as the untouchables. I will say that again. A  SMALL GROUP THAT HAS DIFFERENT RULES.
It is this group and only this group that I am referring to. The statement is: In order to belong to this group that is above the laws we all must live by here you must meet certain criteria.  I then laid out that criteria to belong to this group.

  How  many ways must I state the same thing before you are able to understand the concept of what I am saying? You do not have to agree with me but please make the attempt to hear what it is I am saying.

You know what strike that  please don't make the attempt. I give up.
I have a point of view.  I attempted several times to get that point of view across. Clearly I need to go back to school to learn English because what I'm saying and what many are hearing are worlds apart.

Hows this, I have been assimilated..
Bush sux
Life is wonderful
Coombya
I hereby pledge to never disagree with the vocal minority
Could someone please point me to the official "this weeks official views on the world" paper?  I didn't get my copy.

Eldon I apologize for my proceeding statement, you sir are a genius,  you with one post have broken my will to stand up for what I believe is right and to stand against what I believe is wrong.

Offline ndrew

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  • Posts: 695
  • ....-.-.-.-.-.....
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #28 on: November 16, 2006, 07:13:07 pm »
Grinch,

You had my attention regarding an openness of political difference, however you ended your call for this sensitivity with, "As I see it there is one path to posting anything you'd like here. You must be gay or female, you must be socially and fiscally liberal, you must be willing to accept anything that the “In crowd” says as gospel."  This is where your honest explication displayed your very hue and my sympathy evaporated. 

Why did you have to link political qualities with gender and sexuality?  Perhaps you, just like all of us, are a product of a sexist and homophobic society?  But let us not reduce the blame of your frustrations and insecurities of difference down to being gay or female and link these with the politics that you dislike and claim to be a minority of shall we? 

Anyone that would assume that because someone is trained a certain way is beyond reproach, beyond the potential influence of self-serving goals, dishonesty, corruption, greed, etc., AND EVEN ERROR would be a hollow puppet head. A lifetime in a medical field means absolutely nothing, without an earned respect.  Hiding behind such a shield of proclaimed institutional (whatever it may be in your case) authority means nothing to advance your own sentiment, a sentiment seemingly awash with poor Grinch drowning in a sea “socially and fiscally liberals”… who are all “gay and female.”  Meanwhile, back at the ranch, we still have to deal with homophobic and sexist assholes who whine and cry because they get a taste of difference...

Drew

Offline Grinch

  • Member
  • Posts: 325
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #29 on: November 16, 2006, 07:36:15 pm »
I hereby officially retract any and all statements regarding the qualifications to belong to the group of individuals that in my mind may post with impunity.

  It is very very clear that either my sentence structure or my choice of words did not convey my meaning as I meant it.

I did not mean to infer that one must be of any demographic group to participate in this forum.
I did not mean to infer that one could not be treated in a civil or accepting manner based on any single demographic.
I did not mean to infer that anyone had treated me poorly because of MY demographic.
I sincerely and from the bottom of my heart apologize to anyone that might have mistaken my statement as anti- gay, anti- female, anti anything.
That was not and is not what I was saying.

My statement was and is: This forum has a small group of members that may post in any fashion they choose.  This group occasionally posts information that may or may not be factually correct.  My reference to a medical background was 1 example of how a member posted potentially incorrect or misleading information. My complaint was that this person is in a position of authority and I questioned that individual  not because of the information given but because of her position as a moderator. As I have stated over and over and over again please read the entire post.

Lets just put this to bed folks I clearly have not articulated my thoughts in a coherent manner.  As I stated I have been assimilated. If I ever again post in this forum it will be in the approved manner and will contain the approved point of view.

Offline Eldon

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  • Posts: 2,664
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #30 on: November 16, 2006, 08:21:12 pm »
Hey Grinch,

Thank you for your clarification on the above response. I do agree that each and every one of us should act accordingly as a whole and that their should not be any seperate groups within the group itself.



Make the BEST of each Day!

Offline skeebo1969

  • Member
  • Posts: 5,931
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #31 on: November 17, 2006, 01:26:32 pm »


   Grinch,


       Its sad that both sides here just do not seem to be able to understand.   We can't understand what you are saying and you don't know how to say it.   Now this is what I call a crossroads.   Problem is which way will you go?  And why?   

   Thomas
I despise the song Love is in the Air, you should too.

Offline RevMC

  • Member
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  • It's me!
    • Psychic AwakeningSchool.com
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #32 on: November 17, 2006, 11:05:55 pm »
Not sure about the whole story, but have to put my 2 cents in.  I'm going to be on a roll tonight about a few things, this one first.

First there was a comment made about not following a doctors advice being wrong.  Well if that were the case I probably would have been dead 16 years ago when a doctor told me I had about 2 years to live if I was lucky.  I've been HIV+ for 18 1/2 years.

On December 1, 18 years ago (1988) I declared my candidacy for Mayor of Providence, R.I. openly Gay, openly HIV+.  (You can look at the archies of the Providence Journal to verify, December 1, 1988).  I was doing this to show the true face of AIDS/HIV.  I was diagnosed March 2, 1988.  I had my nurse practitioner tell me I needed to see a psychiatrist because I was in major denial.  The psychiatrist and I talked for quite awhile.  He suggested that my nurse practioner come see him, that I was handling it in a great way.  I was in the news all the time.  I was fighting not only for gay or HIV+ people, I was fighting for everyone.  Why did I come out?  Because I had  nothing to hide.  During my campaigning I was told by many people that I helped change their lives.  I made them more aware that just because someone looked healthy didn't mean they weren't HIV+.

I was never part of any type of in-crowd, yet all of a sudded I was.  I spoke at an Independent National Political convention and did interviews in newspapers, radio, television, etc. . .  I backed down 1 yr later, 1 yr before the race because of the stress.

Don't put anyone down who says they are or were a politician.  Especially one who is open about their HIV status.  They can and do make a difference.  I've thought about getting involved in politics again, but am not sure I want to go through all that again.  It truly was a life changing experience.

I've read many posts on here and have never noticed any types of in-crowds amongst members.  This is a group of very wonderful, caring people regardless of their sex, sexual orientation or race.  I'm sure I've had people not agreeing with things I've posted, just like I've had people who have agreed with me.

When ever it comes to talking about politics, there always ends up being arguments for one reason or another.  Everyone has their opinions, neither is wrong and neither is right.  It is their opinion and a right that we all have.  When we start putting people down because their opinions do not agree with ours, there will never be peace.

Go ahead, verify what I've posted.  It's all documented and recorded and OUT!  You'll probably find many articles about me in the R.I. newspapers.  Also check out the Brown University Newspaper archives, I'm in there too.

If your truly not happy with this group, then may I suggest another, there are many places on the internet for support.  To me, ,this is one of the best places to come to.

Sorry to have rambled on.

Love and Light
Rev.Michael
Part of my story: "Sale Of A Lifetime" POZ December 2003
https://www.poz.com/article/Sale-of-a-Lifetime-752-6797

Started on Truvada and Viramune on 2/15/07

Jan 8, 2007   t-cells 215  Viral Load 10,000  24%
March 26'th  T-cells 306   Viral Load  UNDETECTABLE
June 2007 t-cells 375 Viral Load UNDETECTABLE
August 2007 t-cells 290 Viral Load UNDETECTABLE



Love and Light and Reiki sent your way,
Rev. Michae

Offline Grinch

  • Member
  • Posts: 325
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #33 on: November 17, 2006, 11:21:03 pm »
You see.  This is the problem.
RevMC    Read, comprehend, reply in a manner that suggests you read what was said. 

Your interpretation of my words is not even remotely close to what was written. You chastise me for things that are not remotely close to what I said.
Why is that?

Offline RevMC

  • Member
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  • It's me!
    • Psychic AwakeningSchool.com
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #34 on: November 17, 2006, 11:50:09 pm »
I truly did not mean to sound like I was chastising you.  Far from it.

I posted my own personal experiences, that was it.

I also posted about my personal political history and where it can be verified for accuracy.

I was not telling you to leave, I was suggesting, like I would to anyone else who seems unhappy on ANY group, to try to find one that you would be happy in.

I sense that you are truly a loving and caring person but that you are lonely and afraid.  It's understandable, we are all alone and afraid, that's why we are here, so we are not alone and can be comforted when we are afraid no matter who we are.

I send only love and light your way and hope that you find peace love and happiness in your life.  (I'm not saying that you don't already have these things in your life, just send more your way.  We can all use more.)

I for one am going to stop this  now and forever between us.  I wish you only the best.  No need to reply and keep this going, I'm putting you on ignore.

May you truly find peace and love.

Rev. Michael
Part of my story: "Sale Of A Lifetime" POZ December 2003
https://www.poz.com/article/Sale-of-a-Lifetime-752-6797

Started on Truvada and Viramune on 2/15/07

Jan 8, 2007   t-cells 215  Viral Load 10,000  24%
March 26'th  T-cells 306   Viral Load  UNDETECTABLE
June 2007 t-cells 375 Viral Load UNDETECTABLE
August 2007 t-cells 290 Viral Load UNDETECTABLE



Love and Light and Reiki sent your way,
Rev. Michae

Offline Longislander

  • Member
  • Posts: 2,489
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #35 on: November 18, 2006, 12:00:01 am »
Hi Grinch,

I don't remember reading too much about or from you, except for this thread. I've been popping in here whenever there's a blue thing marking a new post.

I've read your posts here, and I've read all the responses.

I'd like to suggest you take several deep breaths, maybe get a glass of whatever it is you drink to relax yourself a bit, and re-read your first post. Line by line, over and over, until it is clear to YOU what you really said.

Think about why it is, that you are the only one who sees this your way. You had some point you wanted to make, but you must have gone off course with the post.

This is not a fight--starting thread, I don't even know you.

Take it easy,

Paul
infected 10/05 diagnosed 12-05
2/06   379/57000                    6/07 372/30500 25%   4/09 640/U/32% 
5/06   ?? /37000                     8/07 491/55000/24%    9/09 913/U/39%
8/06   349/9500 25%              11/07 515/68000/24     2/10 845/U/38%
9/06   507/16,000 30% !          2/08  516/116k/22%    7/10 906/80/39%
12/06 398/29000 26%             Start Atripla 3/08
3/07   402/80,000 29%            4/08  485/undet!/27
4/07   507/35,000 25%            7/08 625/UD/34%
                                                 11/08 684/U/36%

Offline skeebo1969

  • Member
  • Posts: 5,931
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #36 on: November 18, 2006, 12:10:09 am »


    Man I took my meds an hour and a half ago an d my fingers ain't doing what I want. So I won't try to say to  much other than.   Grinch hang in there buddy
I despise the song Love is in the Air, you should too.

Offline Grinch

  • Member
  • Posts: 325
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #37 on: November 18, 2006, 09:44:52 am »
  I am completely and utterly shocked by the fact that people twisted my words and my meaning into calling me a homophobic bigot.
I'll explain this one last time in simple language, then delete my profile because I give up. Congratulations on driving me away for trying to make this forum better and friendly to EVERYONE.

  My original post was aimed at a very small, very select, group of people. My original post was in response to a series of events, other posts, and "Time Outs" (BTW That term sucks).

  Only one of those people that my OP was meant for responded. He responded in an appropriate manner. He acknowledged that I felt there was a problem. No agreement or disagreement, just acknowledgment. It could have and should have died right there. Moffie one last time thank you for taking the time to read and respond. I may not agree with all that you say, but I always see and appreciate the wisdom of your words.  Your tireless work in your area to make life better for those with AIDS will certainly gain you a special place in heaven.

  The entire point of my original post was to point out that there exists a a small group of people that can and do set the official stance on certain subjects. I was further stating that this group can and will use any language they use choose in response to those that have a differing opinion.  I was also saying that if you were not in this group and you acted in a similar manner you would be both shouted down by them and censured by the moderators of this forum. (I do not think this is some kind of secret club that meets and determines what's what, so keep you "Holy conspiracy theory batman" comments to your self please.)
  I made the unfortunate mistake of noticing and pointing out a common denominator amongst the select few that may post without fear of  reprisal.

 For that I apologize.

The rest of my OP was a couple of examples. These examples were not clearly spelled out because the people I was speaking to knew, without me going into an explanation, exactly what I was speaking of.

  To those of you that that could have and should have stopped this by stepping in and acknowledging my words, and in the process prevent all of the misunderstanding. Shame on you. (Please notice.. no mention of agreement or disagreement)

  To those that took every opportunity to twist my words, shame on you.

  To those that took a moment to actually read entire paragraphs thank you.

When I started coming to this forum  nearly three years ago it was generally a safe place to talk about the day to day issues we all deal with  "Living with HIV"  It has turned into a forum that is anything but safe and comfortable those that don't toe the party line on such things as politics, personal  responsibility, and a host of other subjects.   

  My whole and entire problem is: why? Why do certain people have the right to come here and spew forth hate speech? Why is there two sets of rules? Why is it ok to yell loud and long about one side of any given issue, but not ok to take an opposing stance?  Why do we even have to take a stance or listen to those that do in this forum? Is this not a forum to discuss the trials and tribulations we face as HIV patients? Is this not the place to share our success and failures?

  This still occurs but more and more it has turned into a place in which certain individuals, with the apparent approval of leadership, push their personal agendas and views on non-related subjects.

That was the purpose of my original post, to comment on the state of affairs.  My comments were aimed at a very small group of people. That's it folks, my point of view. Based on my observations, and my experiences.  I could care less if you agree or disagree with that point of view. I only asked that you attempt to see that point of view.  That was clearly too much to ask.  Instead you call me a bigot.  Well done folks.

Bye

Offline anniebc

  • Member
  • Posts: 6,185
  • AM member since 2003
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #38 on: November 18, 2006, 02:08:03 pm »
Hi Grinch

Quote
Is this not a forum to discuss the trials and tribulations we face as HIV patients? Is this not the place to share our success and failures?

It used to be, and I come back everyday hoping that it will be again.

I have been here for 3.5 years now, and over that time there have been disagreements amongst the members, and that will continue to happen no matter what...but they were known as "healthy debates" back then.

Hugs
Jan :-*

-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Never knock on deaths door..ring the bell and run..he really hates that.

Offline skeebo1969

  • Member
  • Posts: 5,931
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #39 on: November 18, 2006, 02:25:55 pm »
   Grinch,

      I think you have more of a problem with your statement about this only being a place for gays and females than anyone here.   We just pointed out that you were wrong in that observation.   That statement did and does not make you a homophobic person at all.   Judging from what I've read no one here seems to think so either.   None the less it was a statement and I am for one am sorry that it upset you that I tried to correct that.

  I still think it important that you see that no one is calling you a homophobic person.   That was an observation made by yourself, you said nothing wrong.

   I wish you would reconsider I for one like you... not that that means anything,although I think it might be tax deductible.

   Thomas
I despise the song Love is in the Air, you should too.

Offline Boo Radley

  • Member
  • Posts: 1,252
  • Not a "real man" and damn proud, mithter... FAB
    • Animal Rescue New Orleans
Re: My Take on the issues
« Reply #40 on: November 19, 2006, 08:21:55 pm »
  Boo,

I am commenting on the state of these forums as a whole.  ...

Now, before you start replying, go back, read the entire thing again, figure out the "Big Picture" of what I'm saying and wait 30 seconds before you call me a closed minded idiot.

Please try to be a tad less condescending.  The term "closed minded idiot" is yours and yours alone.  You seem intent on being unhappy here and finding fault with every response to your posts so I have no further suggestions for you. 

Have a nice day!

Boo
String up every aristocrat!
Out with the priests and let them live on their fat!





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